Things Left Unsaid
by Fuu43
Summary: AU CHAP 11 UP! Present Day AU Leaving Kenshin and the world she had always known behind, Kaoru is faced with tough decisions even as Kenshin is looking for her. KK
1. The Leave Taking

Okay- My first Kenshin fic- and I have to say that I'm excited! I hope you all enjoy this! I got the idea while thinking about just how intense Kenshin is, and how overwhelming it would be to actually be at the center of that intensity. There are so many different interpretations of Kenshin out there, its hard to write him out in a realistic way. It's AU…but I heart AU… so keep that in mind- these characters aren't perfectly like their counterparts- but I tried my best. Please review and tell me what you think!

Rating-R- You know what that means- Kiddies, you've been warned.

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Things Left Unsaid 

Chapter 1

The Leave Taking

* * *

Twisting slightly under the cool sheets, Kaoru scrunched her nose and stifled a sneeze that was trying its best to worm its way out of her. Knowing that she had a long night ahead of her, Kaoru couldn't help but wish it all away for a moment. She burrowed closer into the warm body next to her, and smiled as the hand around her naked waist tightened unconsciously. Even asleep, he didn't want to let go of her. Shutting her eyes, she idly held a piece of his long hair between her fingers and let her other hand rest over his heart, a plain silver necklace resting on around her neck and on his chest. His heart beat steadily against her palm, and she listened to his even breathing. 

Even though it was well before daybreak and the room was too dark to make anything out, she knew that the hair she grasped was the most brilliant shade of red she had ever witnessed and that the body it was connected to it was well toned and riddled with scars. She also had no doubt that the heart that beat beneath her other hand was strong willed, loyal, and passionate.

Slowly untangling their jumbled limbs, she sat up carefully on the edge of the large bed. Trying her best to be stealthy, she made no attempt to take the sheet with her. She couldn't risk him waking, even with the precautions she had already made there was still a chance. Kaoru's bare skin shivered at the contact of cool air, but she ignored it. Her feet dangled over the side, not quite touching the floor, and she braced her hands for leverage. Taking a look over her shoulder, she watched the outline of his sleeping figure. He was always so beautiful when he slept- truly slept. A sleep that seemed to ease away his troubles and temporarily cure the stress that was ingrained in his life.

Turning slightly, she leaned over his prone figure, and couldn't help but brush a stray lock of hair from his face. He didn't stir, and she smiled again at his calm expression. She wondered briefly at how much gold would be in his eyes if he opened them. At how he would react with her right next to him like she was.

Kaoru shut her eyes and took a deep breath, her resolve strengthening. This was not the time to be weak! She had come too far to back off now. Sliding off the bed, she silently picked her way around the furniture, putting on her previously discarded clothing. Stooping slightly over one of the chairs, she couldn't help but grimace. Kaoru was sore from last night, and her body couldn't help but protest. She herself wouldn't have realized just how much exertion, mentally and physically, having sex was on a person. Not that she would have taken it back. No, last night was a memory she would hold close to her heart for the rest of her life.

His body surrounding her, his hot breath on her skin, his gentle yet strong hands holding her close, and a feeling of intense love that seemed to permeate throughout the entire room. It had been terrifying and wonderful.

Shutting her eyes, she fought back sudden tears even as she pulled on her sweater. If someone had asked her six months ago if she could picture herself in this situation- she would have laughed. And yet only four months ago her life had changed irrevocably. Lacing up her shoes, she looked briefly over the darkened room, trying to figure out if she'd forgotten anything. Nodding to herself in satisfaction, she reached into her back jean pocket, and pulled out a note that had taken her hours to write. Pulling it tightly to her chest, she didn't try to stop the tears that haphazardly spilled from her eyes.

Maneuvering around the silent room, she halted her movements and listened. Her breath sounded loud and labored in her ears, but his breath remained smooth and even. She was glad. She wouldn't know what to do if he woke up. Biting her lip in concentration, Kaoru walked to the far end of the room and tucked the note under a folder on his desk. She was sure he'd find it and figure everything out after only searching an hour or so. But she needed that time of confusion, needed all the time she could get.

She cracked the door open and slipped through, allowing a brief moment to watch his still form. Her chest hurt and she shut the gap quietly. Kaoru never realized that it hurt so much to love. Walking down the hall and to the living room, she didn't pause or hesitate. Hesitation couldn't be allowed. Halting in front of the door to his home, she couldn't help but feel a lingering need.

Her fingers closed over the necklace hiding beneath her sweater, her fingers grazing and memorizing the delicate piece of art. Kaoru had something to remember this time, to remember him- and this one thing would be enough. She couldn't get all whinny and weepy. Wiping her wet cheeks, she opened the door and stepped out into the night.

Kaoru walked briskly, ignoring a bitter late spring chill. She wasn't usually the type of person to be out on the New York Streets so late, but it couldn't be helped. Tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear, she crossed her arms tightly over her chest and made her way toward a busier street. She needed to find a cab as quickly as possible. These first hours were the most important. The sleeping drug she had given him would probably only work for a little longer-he would wake to find her missing. And then, in the words of a spiky haired friend of hers, the shit would hit the fan. Walking toward a busier clubbing area, she smiled at her luck. With the bars closing, the were more cabs than she could count in sight.

After finally securing a cab, she quickly gave the address before turning her attention to the window. Lights flickered by, and the city that never slept did its best to fulfill that promise.

On a night like this, it was fitting that her thoughts would be only for him.

Kenshin.

She had met him on an evening similar to this. Walking home from a birthday party her close friend Sanosuke had thrown in her honor, she'd been in an unfamiliar area. At the time she had never felt so tired, lost, and ready for bed. Still dressed in her high school uniform, a punk of kids had decided to have a bit of fun with her. She had never been so petrified in her life. But then he came out of no where,

_"Don't touch her."_

and those that had tried to harm her were down for the count with him only using his hands.

_Exuding charm and danger, the red haired man was barely taller than herself._

_"Are you alright?"_

_Kaoru watched him with wide eyes, drinking in his handsome face and burning eyes of violet and amber. A large 'x' shaped scar adorned one of his cheeks, and her breath quickened as his eyes focused entirely on her. He wore dark clothes, and barely looked winded from the fight. Approaching her steadily, she couldn't help but flinch. She watched him visibly tense at her actions, and his movements stilled. Kaoru wouldn't deny that she had been afraid- terrified actually. What had happened had been right out of a nightmare, and for a moment she had actually thought that she would die._

_"I'm fine."_

_Her words sounded false and hollow in her ears, but she had at least managed to get them out. He nodded at her answer, and looked at her more closely._

_"You shouldn't be out here at this time of night. Not dressed like that."_

Kaoru titled her head back against the cab seat and allowed herself a brief smile. She had been so angry when he had said that to her.

_"What?"_

_She was confused, tired, and now starting to get pissed. She didn't need someone telling her how to live her life on top of that. Trying to focus on him, Kaoru watched him take a deep breath. The muscles on his chest stood at attention, and she couldn't help but notice how yummy he was. He scratched at the back of his head, and once again she found herself tangled up in that mess of hair on his head. He really was sexy, if not a little dangerous looking. Suddenly, she felt quite guilty for being so rude._

_She bowed her head reproachfully._

_"I'm sorry I've been so impolite. Thank you for helping me." _

_Kaoru had to admit, she had never been so disrespectful to a stranger before. She was a person that prided herself on being kind to others, especially strangers. New York needed more friendly individuals. Feeling him closer, she looked up. Only a short distance from him, his eyes had become even more intriguing- the amber becoming mere flecks. He smiled, and she smiled back._

_"It's no problem, let me make sure you get home safe."_

Now that Kaoru thought about it, it seemed rather silly of her to trust a stranger to get her home safely. But then, at that time she had still lived in such a sheltered world.

_They walked next to each other, the sounds of the city filtering through Kaoru's ears. Only minutes earlier, Kaoru had been tired, exhausted. The feeling had disappeared though, and now all she wanted was to get to know the individual next to her. She felt strung as tight as a bow._

_Watching him from the corner of her eyes, she jump as he broke the silence._

_"What were you doing out so late."_

_His voice was clear and precise, a subtle strength lining its edges. Clasping her hands together, she didn't hesitate to answer._

_"I was at a party."_

_Raising an eyebrow at her, he shook his head letting his bangs sweep across his face. _

_"You don't seem like the party type."_

_She laughed at that, laughed because already he could tell so much about her._

_"I'm not really, my friend threw me one for my birthday."_

_He turned to her, and she let herself look at his face. The emotions just beneath the surface of his eyes were so deep, so full of controlled power and emotion. She wondered what they would look like when he was angry. _

_"Today is your birthday?"_

_Although the inflection in his voice hadn't changed, she felt herself shiver. Why should it matter if today was her birthday?_

_"Yes."_

_Kaoru bit her lip at how weak and pathetic her voice had sounded. Like some breathy cry… it made her sick._

_"How old are you?"_

_She watched him warily again, but he seemed completely preoccupied with the streets around them, glancing frequently into dark alleys as they passed. Would it hurt to tell him? She supposed it didn't really matter. _

_"Eighteen."_

_He smiled at her then, and she couldn't help but smile back. He was kind, considerate, and utterly gorgeous. They turned a corner, and Kaoru briefly thanked God for letting this stranger come across her and help her. _

Kaoru dug around in her front pocket for a piece of gum. The drive seemed slower than humanly possible. Taking a deep breath, she tried her best not to dwell on the past. It seemed utterly unavoidable however.

_He had done what he said he'd do, and only fifteen or so minutes later she found herself outside of her family's home_.

_Turning to face him, Kaoru found herself almost sad to be home. His presence was wonderful, comforting, and slightly exhilarating. Just being near him caused her stomach to lodge firmly in her throat, the combination of emotions he evoked in her being altogether new and compelling. _

_"Thank you, again, for helping me out."_

_He nodded, his eyes watching her home before turning to her._

_"It wasn't any problem…?"_

_Raising his eyebrow at her yet again, she smiled at his attempt to learn her name. _

_"Kaoru, my name is Kaoru."_

_He grinned at this, his mouth slowly repeating the name. She shivered at the sound. The noise sounded deep and possessive in his mouth. His smile grew._

_"I'm Kenshin."_

_He held his hand out for her to shake, and she grasped it in her own. It was strong, yet held hers gently within it. The handshake was unhurried and purposeful, causing another shiver to race up Kaoru's spine. Disengaging her hand carefully she walked up the steps slowly, yawning as the night finally seemed to catch up with her. _

_"Thank you, Kenshin- and good night." _

_When she turned back to face him, his eyes were unreadable under the street lights. Pushing her key into the lock, she jumped as his voice broke the quiet._

_"Happy birthday Kaoru." _

Kaoru thoughts paused when the cabbie honked his horn loudly at another car. When looking back and trying to figure out at what moment Kenshin had decided to pursue her, she often came to this moment. Had it been here? Or maybe during their quiet walk to her building. Or perhaps had it been even earlier- Could it have been when he saw her? At that instant had he decided to make her his?

She didn't know, and she supposed that now she never would. Glancing out the dirt smudged window Kaoru watched the city night life go by. She really did love this city. Even with its faults, it was still an intriguing and mysterious place. It reminded her of Kenshin in a lot of ways. The city was so full of different levels, and what you saw at the surface was almost always not a true reflection on what was actually happening underneath. It was going to be sad to leave this all behind.

The day after they had met, she awoke to find a front porch full of flowers. They had all been from him. Flattered, she had never felt so giddy in her entire life. Boys didn't pay attention to her, had never paid attention to her in the past. Not that she blamed them. She got good grades, was nice enough, wasn't hideous or anything, but still always seemed to be the 'sister' in all of her guy friendships. And Kenshin had downright wooed her with the stunt. In that condition, she hadn't stood a chance.

He had called later in the day, and asked if she wanted to go dancing. She hadn't even wondered how he managed to get her phone number. Looking back, Kaoru could see all the warning signs she had so blatantly ignored. Of course she had accepted, it was the least she could do to repay him for helping her and buying her flowers.

The cab halted abruptly, and Kaoru was thrown from her previous thoughts. Digging out money, she paid the man before rushing out of the car and up the steps. Light was just beginning to filter over the horizon. Glancing at the watch on her wrist, she calculated the time she still had left. Twenty minutes. Hopefully that would be enough. She had only been to huge train station twice in her life, but had done her best to commit the path to memory. Walking briskly down several hallways, she entered the locker area and began the last leg of her journey.

Stopping in front of one, she pulled out the key and opened the locker. The small duffle bag seemed to have shrunk since she placed it there only yesterday, but she knew in actuality it hadn't changed size. She pulled the bag out, and shut the locker with a resounding clack. Swinging the entirely too light bag over her shoulder, she kept her head lowered, even as she entered the closest female restroom. Kaoru wasn't sure if he would check the security cameras for her, but she knew that she needed to be careful.

It was empty, and she praised her good fortune. Ripping open the bag, she pulled out a pair of scissors. Her hands shook slightly, and she watched her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were large and wet, almost on the verge of tears, and her face was pale and tense.

"Be strong."

The words felt hollow as they left her mouth, and she tentatively brought the scissors up to her hair. He loved her hair. Kenshin had told her on numerous occasions how it was like glimpsing true twilight. He loved to play with it, loved to see it floating freely around her shoulders. He loved her hair almost as much as she loved his own. But it was so recognizable, so much a part of the old her. Biting her inside cheek, she cut.

Long strands fell into the sink as she worked hard at cutting evenly and quickly. Her thoughts drifted to the past again, and Kaoru didn't stop the scenes from passing behind her eyes.

_The club was dark and full of people. Neon lights flickered over the crowd, and heavy music played in the air. She had only been to this type of place once or twice before, and clung to the hand that was guiding her. Kenshin smiled back at her, and she felt a blush of bright crimson on her face. She hoped the dark shadows concealed it. Allowing herself to examine him closer, she admired the way his dark pants and shirt draped over his frame. Man, he was captivating._

_They had spoken in his car on the drive over, and she had found herself even more attracted to him. The way he subtly watched her, how he always listened to her, how his eyes lingered on her body when he first picked her up. He definitely didn't think of her like a sister. _

_Kenshin pulled her gently onto the dance floor, and she gladly followed. Although Kaoru wasn't familiar with this place, she loved dancing and knew that it would make her feel infinitely more comfortable. Giggling as one of her favorite songs came on, she pulled him tightly to her and let her body move to the music. She could tell already he was a fabulous dancer. His movements were graceful and sleek, his body moving with hers almost on instinct. _

_A few songs later, she felt something start to change in the way they danced. If possible, their bodies grew even closer, not ever seeming to lose contact with one another. She had never danced so passionately, so freely and explicitly. His breath was heavy in her ears, and sweat seemed to cling to their moving forms. Kaoru turned in his hold, and allowed herself to grind up against him. _

_Hearing his breath catch, she was unprepared when his hands grasped her hips and pulled her closer. Sliding up her body, Kenshin's hand rested just below Kaoru's breast, the other still attached to her waist. She felt the world tilt. This dancing felt so deliciously sinful that there was no way she would have stopped even if she wanted. Twisting her head back, she couldn't help but whimper softly. His hands tightened their grip. _

_She wondered if he knew. If he had any idea that she had absolutely no experience in this sort of thing. That the slightest touch from him sent her body over the edge. Pushing the thoughts from her mind, she felt determined to have a good time. And she did. _

Thinking back now, Kaoru remembered the night with fondness. It was the first of many she had spent dancing with Kenshin. At times she wondered how he had moved with her like that and not gone crazy. Kaoru had unintentionally begged for more than she could handle, more than she was ready for. Not knowing what her body wanted, she gave in to the primal urges as best as she could. By grinding up against him until he nearly passed out. She had asked him later in their relationship how he had handled their first encounters. His reply had been simple, it had been a test of his self control not to throw her to the ground and make her scream his name.

She paused to examine her hair. Bobbed just under her chin, the hair felt lightweight and odd. Satisfied, she pulled the hair from the sink and threw it away. Stepping into the handicapped stall she changed her clothes and threw on a baseball hat that belonged to her brother. She knew that she should really dye her hair as well, but not even she could put herself through so much torture. Walking out of the bathroom, Kaoru made her way across the station.

Taking the steps two at a time, she halted abruptly at the pain between her legs. Gritting her teeth, she took them more slowly. Perhaps she could buy some sort of pain medication on the train. She had no idea how long her body would be sore. Not that Kenshin hadn't been gentle, he had most definitely tried to be. She had never realized that it would feel so good, never realized how wild she could be. Kaoru felt the blush on her cheeks, and did her best to dispel the rampant thoughts inside of her. Walking stiffly, she was thankful to find her train and board with five minutes to spare.

Finding her seat she leaned forward, supporting her elbow on the armrest. Shutting her eyes, she took deep calming breaths. Reaching for her bag, she held the only objects she had allowed herself to carry. It was important to travel right, she couldn't be bogged down with baggage. Hopefully it would be enough. Looking out the window, she felt nervous tension leave her body as the train started.

They had been dating for nearly four months when she came to realize something. Kenshin was not quite what he seemed. She hadn't been bothered when he told her that he was twenty three, five years her senior. Instead she had laughed, saying that she always had wondered what dating an older man would be like. She hadn't found it strange when his work went late into the night and was unpredictable. When he was uninformative on what he actually did for a living, she'd been only slightly perturbed. His job after all didn't make change who he was. And Kenshin had always been quiet about himself, preferring to talk and ask questions about her. Any information she had gotten had been pried or won with sheer luck.

It was on a Friday night while clubbing that Kaoru began to realize just how dangerous her boyfriend was.

_Sweaty and hot, Kaoru felt Kenshin stop dancing before he said anything. He wiped a stray hair from her face, and she held her body to his. At moments like this, Kaoru wondered how she had even survived without him. He was warm, strong, protective, funny, smart, amazing. He made her stomach curl and her body ache. _

_He pressed his mouth to her ear._

_"Do you want something to drink?"_

_She nodded, knowing her voice wouldn't cut through the loud music. Watching him disappear into the crowd, she sighed. No one had expected Kaoru to get into a relationship so quickly, lest of all her. She'd been swept off her feet without even realizing it. _

_Someone tapped expectantly at her shoulder. Turning, Kaoru was caught off guard when a hand clamped around her waist, while the other locked her arms. _

_The man holding her smelled of cheap booze, and she struggled against him. His hold tightened, and she found herself fighting for breath. He hefted her off the floor, and she nearly threw up when held up against his body. Kaoru didn't know what to do. _

_"Kenshin." _

_Her voice barely registered with the loud music, and all the people dancing blocked her view. She didn't know what this guy's problem was, but she trusted Kenshin to figure it out. His hand crept up toward her breast, and she felt herself go cold. _

_"Kenshin!" _

_Her scream was desperate and terrified. _

_"Kenshin!"_

Kaoru started from a passing by woman. Blinking rapidly, she locked out the memories of that night. It was after that night, and the incident, that she knew that she couldn't stay with him. She had lost something that night, and still now she didn't know what to do with the memory. Her right hand briefly touched her left shoulder, tracing a light scar and she jerked when she realized her own actions.

It had taken a while for her to make a decision. After all, in those short months she had grown to rely on Kenshin, had grown to need him. She loved him. Kaoru couldn't talk to her mother about it, the letter she had left her would hopefully be explanation enough. Her mother had led a hard life, raising her children alone while working two jobs. She wasn't as strong as she used to be.

Her younger brother Yahiko was mature for being only fourteen, but she didn't want to involve someone so young and innocent. Their relationship was tumultuous at best. They loved each other, she wouldn't deny that- but she knew how irresistible it was to press at his buttons. And he never passed up an opportunity to press hers. She had only herself, and trying to figure it out had been difficult. For Kenshin, she would leave. For him, she would give up everything. Kaoru had already graduated, high school the only thing that may have held her back from her decision no longer a factor.

She had finally gone to Sanosuke and asked for some sort of knock out drug. He was the only one she could trust with this, the only one that could make sure everything worked out. He wouldn't deny the fact that he had been involved in some sorted events in the past, and she didn't have the slightest clue on how to accomplish her goals. He had been angry with her, angry that she would tell him nothing. But eventually her begging and tears had won out.

_"Kaoru, do you know what you're doing?" _

Sanosuke's voice still rang loud and clear in her mind. He had used her name, her real name and not the silly little nick name that she had only heard for years. He knew it was serious. Having met him in middle school, the two of them had formed a close bound in a matter of days. They leaned on each other, and provided strength when at times things were tough.

Sanosuke hadn't liked Kenshin in the beginning of her relationship with him and Kenshin hadn't been too fond of Sanosuke either. Both of them were protective and unsure about other guys around her. It had taken numerous occasions, but in the last weeks she had seen Sanosuke and Kenshin start to warm up to one another. She knew that they could be fast friends, if they'd only give each other a chance. At the time he was excited for her, excited to see what would happen in the future. He was an older brother to her, and doing this must have killed him.

_"Sanosuke, you can't tell anyone about this- I mean it. In a couple of days there might be some people looking for me, you have to be careful. Please Sano, please trust me."_

She had pleaded and pleaded to get him to agree. There was no way she would have been able to do this without him. When he finally wiped away her tears, Kaoru knew she had his cooperation. He hated to see her cry. She had left that night with information and contacts that would be vital to her, and a small vial of something that would change everything.

_"Kaoru?"_

_"Yes Sano?"_

_"Please, even if you shut everything out- don't let this be the last time I see you."_

She knew her response was not what he wanted.

_"Please, just keep an eye on my family."_

Kaoru pictured his face briefly, the wide smile and sparkling brown eyes. And his hair, the dark hair that seemed to defy gravity. She would miss him.

Two days and hours of planning later, she went over to Kenshin's for dinner. Her plan had been simple. Just get him to drink the liquid, so she could get a few extra hours of travel time in. Kenshin slept light, and now that she was no longer in high school- they saw each other nearly every day. She had worn her favorite sweater and a pair of jeans, planning on making everything as normal as possible.

Of course, halfway through the meal he had cooked for them, he had known something was up. She had managed to put the drug in his drink, but knew from Sanosuke that it would take four hours to completely take effect.

_"Kaoru, are you alright?"_

_His voice was soft and probing. Kaoru looked up from her barely touched food, and watched his eyes. They were a soft purple laced with more amber than she had seen in a long time. She loved his eyes. Twisting the fork idly in her hand, she watched her plate. How could she wait any longer? Every minute felt uncomfortable and torturous. Spending time with him had never been that way until tonight. _

_He moved and her eyes reflexively followed him. She drank in his sight, knowing the memories would have to last her a life time. The long hair pulled in a high ponytail, the dark t-shirt that fit his small but strong frame, and the energy he seemed to exude. _

_She wondered if she could ever feel this way again. _

_"Do you wanna watch a movie?"_

_She ignored his question and countered with one of her own. Maybe a movie could keep her mind off everything for a little while. She hoped he wouldn't press her for answers she wasn't willing to give. He nodded yes, and she helped him clean up the meal. Kaoru had to admit that he was a good cook, a great cook. He worked diligently on the dishes, and Kaoru dried them as best as she could. Finishing, she set the cloth down with an inaudible sigh. How could she do this? Feeling suddenly exhausted and emotionally drained, she leaned forward and pressed her head between his shoulder blades. He stilled his movements even as her hands clutched at the back of his shirt. _

_"Kenshin." _

_She spoke his name in little more than a whisper, sobs rapidly choking her voice. She bit her lip, even as her cries became surprisingly violent. How could she feel so much for one person? He turned and cradled her, picking her up easily- she melted into his embrace. Moving to the living room he sat on the couch, still holding her. Kenshin rocked her back and forth steadily, and Kaoru cried into the crook of his neck. When she finally had her sobs under control, she pulled away, embarrassed and unsure. He didn't let her go however, continuing to rock her until she felt her breathing return to normal._

_"Don't pull away from me Kaoru."_

_The words spoke to her deeper than he could have ever imagined. The commanding tone in his voice left no room for argument, and she was reminded of just how much Kenshin kept hidden. _

_Leaning in, he licked away the tears that had accumulated on her face. She could feel the blush on her cheeks. _

_"Do you want to talk about it?"_

_His voice had turned soothing, and she shook her head no. Kaoru needed to do this, for him, for her, for so many reasons. He nodded in understanding, the glint in his eyes telling her that there would be questions later. By that time however, she would hopefully be gone. Letting herself be held, she was surprised when a small package was set in her lap._

_"I was waiting for the right time to give this to you."_

_She looked up at Kenshin, unsure of what to say. He had gotten her a gift. The same night she had been deceptive and cruel, he had thoughtfully presented her with a token of his feelings. The same night she would rip herself away from him…Kaoru could feel the tears on the back of her eyes. He rubbed her back soothingly, and clasped her shaking hands in his own._

_"It's alright Kaoru, it's alright."_

_He always treated her like this. Like she might break at any moment. She found his concern for her both heart warming and heart wrenching. Could he truly see just how emotionally confused she was? How much she leaned on his strength? Kaoru knew he must, because beneath that calm exterior she had glimpsed a passionate and possessive man. A part of him that was gradually becoming more and more apparent each day- that he would do anything to protect her, anything to keep her close to him. _

_She removed one of her hands from his to open the box. A silver necklace lay within, a lone diamond shining brightly in the room. Taking it out, she examined it closer, it was simply breathtaking._

_Feeling emotion spill forth, she didn't try to stop the tears on her cheeks. His hands closed over hers once again, and he smoothly put the piece of jewelry on her. This was too much for her too handle. How many times would she cry tonight?_

_"Kaoru. I hate seeing your tears."_

_He kissed at her tears once more, and she shivered beneath his firm hold. The necklace was cool against her skin. Nipping down her face, one hand remained on her waist, while the other cradled the back of her neck. She felt his breath than lips tickle at her bare skin. _

_"Kaoru, I love you."_

_Hearing those words from his lips, Kaoru's world grew white. His touch created a fire on her skin, and she couldn't help but writhe as the experience intensified. Feeling urgent, she pulled his face up to hers and kissed him back, pressing him deeply into the couch. His eyes were an intense amber. She grew hot and needy, and knew that there was only one precious gift that she wanted to give him before she left. Kaoru grabbed at his hand, moving it up beneath her top and toward her breasts. Her other hand was already fiddling with his shirt. One gift that could tell him exactly what she felt for him. _

Kaoru felt herself blush, thinking about last night's encounter. She herself hadn't planned on it, hadn't even thought about it before it happened. Sipping on an ice tea she had stored in her bag, she recalled some of her memories with affection. He had been so unsure at first, so unwilling to do something that she didn't want. Once he was convinced however that she did want it…Kaoru knew that her blush had deepened.

Some of her memories after that were a bit of a blur. After all, she hadn't exactly been thinking completely lucidly. It was hard to breath with him touching her, let alone think. But it had been incredible, he was incredible.

Looking out the window, she watched New York fall out of view. The sun had finally made its first appearance of the day, and the city was illuminated in a magical glow. She clutched at her necklace and rested her head against the back of the seat. This was goodbye. Goodbye to her family, friends…it was goodbye to the man she loved. And even as she choked back tears, she realized the horrible truth.

He had said he loved her, and she had never said it back.


	2. Keeping Secrets

Authors Note- To be honest, I wasn't exactly sure where to go with this chapter. I knew where I wanted to end up, but I didn't know whether or not to touch on what happened with Kenshin following Kaoru's disappearance- or just skip it all together. Deciding that it would flesh him and their relationship out more, I put it in. Hopefully this gives you a better insight into Kenshin. I got a couple of responses wondering how long this will be- I'm thinking 7-8 chapters- but who knows! Also, this chapter was sort of hard to write being that it did a lot of setting up for the future and filling in and stuff.

Also- Please do me a favor- Review! It provides soooo much encouragement.

Rating-"R" … And no, I'm not a pirate.

Oh- and I suppose I should say that I own NONE of these characters.

* * *

Things Left Unsaid

Chapter 2

Keeping Secrets

* * *

Kenshin stretched languidly underneath cool sheets, a feeling akin to a hangover pounding in his skull. Rubbing his hands against his eyes groggily, he wondered how much alcohol he had consumed in the last twenty four hours. He hadn't felt this hung over in years. Trying to ignore the pounding headache, he kept his eyes closed as sunlight filtered in through the window and across the bed. The sun was not helping his migraine. Kenshin sighed aloud. Not only had he drank way too much, he had slept in. What time was it exactly? Feeling slightly confused, he furrowed his brow in an attempt to remember what exactly had happened last night.

His mind screeched to a halt as images of a very beautiful and very willing Kaoru underneath him slammed into view. Last night came filtering back, and he smiled lazily. Kaoru's supple skin beneath his hands, her long legs, slim waist, and firm breasts pressed up against him as she encouraged him with soft gasps and pleading moans. It had been more amazing than he had ever thought. And she had wanted it, practically begged for it. Not that he needed the encouragement.

The sluggishness in his body intensified, and Kenshin wondered how he managed to feel so shitty following such an amazing experience. He hadn't drank anything, and never felt like this after a night of sex. Rolling toward Kaoru, he smiled at the thought of teasing her about last night. She would undoubtedly blush ten distinct shades of red. And without any clothes, he would finally be able to see just how far her blush spread. Not that he hadn't gotten a pretty good idea last night.

Although he knew it would be to soon for her, he was already counting down the minutes until he could repeat last night's…activities. It was more than he had ever dreamed it could be- and he had dreamed about it a lot. Kenshin smirked even as he reached. He was going to have to tell her that too.

Touching only empty space, he cracked open an eye and was met with the sight of her half of the bed unfilled. Kenshin frowned in puzzlement. Where had she run off to? Shifting his head, he listened for the shower running or any other sort of movement in the house. While she wasn't clumsy, he knew his heightened senses would have picked up her actions when she got up. He had precise senses already, but around her, those senses were magnified a hundred times- there was no way he would have missed her. Pushing up with his hands, he opened both eyes and glanced at the room. Something didn't add up.

Removing the tangled sheets from his legs, he climbed out of the bed and shrugged on a pair of boxers before looking around more closely. Running a hand through his tangled hair, he grabbed a loose binder on the floor and swept the messy locks back- lavender in color, he knew the hair tie was Kaoru's. It was the only thing of hers in the room.

Kenshin's thoughts seemed jumbled inside his mind, and it took him longer than usual to focus. But when his thoughts finally started to assemble, he came to two conclusions immediately. One- He had been drugged in some way- there was no way his mind had gotten this muddled naturally, and Two- Kaoru was not there.

Unsure what to think, Kenshin walked than rushed through the house, running from room to room- not quite able to comprehend what was happening. She wasn't anywhere. Pausing in the hallway, Kenshin took a deep breath. He was overreacting, he had to be. He wasn't sure what was happening, but Kaoru…no he wouldn't try to convince himself. Something was wrong. Walking back to his room, he grabbed the phone off the hook and dialed her cell.

The number was no longer in use.

Cursing, he slammed the phone back on the receiver and spun around. Thoughts of last night drifted back into his mind. He had known something wasn't right- something had been off for a while. She'd been tense, emotional, radiating guilt, and he had ignored it. Despite how strong she was, he had thought it was her trying to figure out how to balance him with family and friends. Kaoru was still very young, and he knew that her first relationship being so serious would take some adjusting. He had thought to give her a little space to think.

When she had finally collapsed against him, he saw just how raw her emotions had become. He hadn't known what to do and relied on instinct. He had planned on bringing it up today over breakfast, last night had drawn them closer than he had ever felt before. But she was no where to be found. He could feel his heart beat speed up, and his breath quicken. An enemy of his hadn't drugged him and kidnapped her, right? No. There was no sign of struggle, no sign of forced entry.

Standing still in his room, he shut his eyes and pushed away the lingering after effects of what ever he had been given. Going over the side effects in his mind, he had a pretty good idea of what drug he had been slipped. But who exactly had given it to him? And where was Kaoru? Why was her cell phone disconnected? If something had happened to her…When his eyes opened, he knew without needing a mirror that they were no longer violet. He was getting upset…very upset. Taking in his room critically, he looked for any discrepancy that hadn't been there before.

There. On his desk. The folders that had been stacked cleanly yesterday were askew. Drawing his lips into a thin line, he approached the desk and moved the folders slowly, wondering who had moved them and why. A wrinkled envelope lay at the bottom of the pile, and Kenshin fingered the lettering on the outside. It was his name in Kaoru's handwriting, stained with water spots. No, not water spots- tears. Feeling something drop in his stomach, he snatched it up and pulled out the letter within. Scanning it quickly, he felt his insides crack, even as he examined it again. Kenshin was sure he had misread it. He must have.

_Kenshin-_

_Thank you for everything. Please don't search for me. Please. You wont see me again. _

_-Kaoru_

This wasn't possible. She had left? But that would mean…she had drugged him. She had planned this. But why? And for how long had she been thinking about it? How long had he been deceived? Did she care for him at all? These last few months hadn't been a lie, had they? Kenshin felt his blood grow slow in his veins. No. Kaoru was innocent and open. She had always been easy to read- from the moment he met her. Last night she had exuded guilt and sadness. She hadn't wanted to leave. He had seen it tear her apart. She cared for him, as much as he cared for her. He had witnessed it last night. She had given herself to him. Every word she spoke while in that blissful daze had been so beautiful and truthful.

_"Kenshin, I need you." "Kenshin, never let me go." _and so softly he had almost missed it, _"I love you."_ He wondered if she had even been aware of her own spoken thoughts.

So why? Why had she left?

He stomped the questions out. They could wait. He just needed to find her, before she got to far. Picking up the phone he dialed the first person he thought of. In his mind he could feel the list growing of people he would need to contact. What would Kaoru do? How far would she go? She had gotten rid of her cell phone, but what else would she alter?

"Hello."

The person's voice on the other side of the phone was monotone, but Kenshin could still feel the underlying tension. Kenshin never called during the weekend unless it was important.

"I need your help."

Kenshin knew he could find her. In his line of work there was no way she could escape him. And Aoshi was just at good if not better than him at finding things out that a person wanted to keep hidden. It was what the brooding man was known for. Looking over the room again, he took in a breath and found her scent surrounding him. Jasmine. He glanced into a mirror hanging on the far wall, and could see the changes in his reflection. His eyes were hard and glittered gold, his body tense and taut- he was ready for war. And he would fight for her. Grabbing at a pair of pants hanging off one of the chairs, his conversation with Aoshi was quick.

When he found her, he would never let her go again.

* * *

4 years later-

* * *

"Kia! Where are you?"

A woman rushed through the back of the building towards the voice, the caller's cries mingling with the servers, cooks, managers, guests, and background music of the restaurant. A tinkling sound followed her as she ran, the bells on her outfit a beacon and a nuisance. Avoiding other servers as she went, the woman didn't pause to catch her breath. She hoped she wasn't in trouble. Struggling through the wide double kitchen doors, she checked her costume before facing the manager. The ribbons were still in place, as were the absurd amount of bells attached. The pink ruffles and white petticoats of her skirt hadn't creased, and her tall knee high socks were still up.

Pushing a stray lock of raven colored hair back into her platinum blond wig, Kaoru laughed inwardly at the ridiculous costume she was in tonight. She had hoped for one a little less… scary. Oh well, at least it wasn't the worst. Biting her lip, she faced her manager with a certain amount of trepidation. She didn't remember doing anything wrong.

"Kia. I was wondering if you could do me a favor."

Gary wasn't her favorite manager, and Kaoru was once again reminded why. He was always asking her to pull an extra shift, or stay late to clean or something. Not that she hated her job. She felt lucky to work in such an upscale, if not slightly strange bar and restaurant. Scratching at her head through the wig, Kaoru flinched inside at how well she responded to 'Kia.' She supposed that being called that for so long would do the same thing to anyone. If someone called her Kaoru today, how would she respond? Would she recognize her own name? Shaking her head free of the thought, she smiled openly at Gary. Kaoru hoped he didn't see through it.

"What kind of favor?"

"I was wondering if you could stay late. Kyo isn't feeling well."

Kaoru looked apologetic, even as her mind screamed. Of course Kyo wasn't feeling well… someone always seemed to not be feeling well, or had car problems, or had visiting relatives.

"I'm sorry, I can't."

And it was true, if she stayed beyond her shift, she was going to be in trouble. She didn't have that kind of money to spend. Things had been tight the last few months. Plus, who knew what he would do if she was late. She hated disappointing him.

"Well, just think about it."

She nodded, knowing already that her final answer was no. He said his thanks before turning to harass another server. Kaoru watched him walk away before getting back to her own duties. Although all her tables were full, most were either just chatting, or sipping at drinks. It made her ecstatic. Not only did she have to do less work, but with all those drinks, their bill would be high- and that hopefully meant a larger tip. She glanced at the watch hidden by her sleeve. Only two more hours. Rolling her shoulders, she pursed her lips, wondering if she would pull in enough money to survive next month. She crossed her fingers, even as someone's hands covered her eyes.

"Guess who!"

The high pitched girly voice met her ears, and Kaoru couldn't help but smile. Grabbing the hands, she spun around and faced her would be attacker. The petite woman smiled up at her had large eyes framed in thick dark hair. Of course, she wouldn't have to wear a wig tonight.

"No fair Misao, it's not fair that I have to wear this scratchy thing, and you don't have to wear one."

The woman smiled mischievously, twisting one of her hands in her outfit. Kaoru eyed the get-up, her aggravation only growing. It was not only simple, but cute and easy to move in.

"So, you get to be a ninja- and I'm stuck being Little Bo Peep! That is not fair!"

Misao giggled, then twisted a long dark strand between her fingers as she eyed Kaoru's bright costume.

"You look…nice."

Kaoru grit her teeth. Misao was wonderful…and aggravating.

"You're not helping."

The shorter server grinned, and Kaoru rolled her eyes. Misao was the first server she had met after starting at the Blue Spot. A sophomore in college, she was two years younger than Kaoru, and full of life. Bright, spunky, and utterly enjoyable- Kaoru had seen something in her that reminded Misao of herself. Before things had changed- when she had still been... Before anything. Kaoru had been reluctant to get close to her, even as she had longed for friendship. Even as she still longed for it. Kaoru worried constantly about exposing something that she shouldn't, even after avoiding him for four years. Sano had warned her, that it only took one slipped word, and he could find out. But she hadn't, she hadn't said anything. And four years later, she was still nobody.

Despite her best efforts, it had only taken a few months for Misao to become her closest friend. If friendship was what you could call it. Outside of work, she still avoided Misao usually- but Misao hadn't pushed too hard for anything more. And Kaoru was glad. Shifting her wig yet again, she crossed her arms.

"What am I going to do with you Misao?"

Misao pursed her lips, before chewing thoughtfully on the end of her braid and shrugging. Kaoru shook her head, she had the oddest habits.

"Well, I'm going to check on my tables."

Kaoru put a hand to her head at the sight her friend made, and spun on her heel. Hearing her good natured laugh, Kaoru spent the next two hours trying to keep her customers happy. She did her best to ignore the bells on her outfit, the teasing inflicted on her by Misao, and the tightness that started in her shoulders and ran down to her knees. When her last table left, and her shift work was done, Kaoru heaved a sigh of relief.

Stepping into the worker's room, she hung up the hideous outfit- shelving it beside a cowboy costume. Rolling her shoulders, she was glad to be back in comfortable jeans and a sweater. Pulling out the hair pins that kept her raven locks hidden, she sighed in contentment as her hair was freed from its prison. Brushing through the long locks with her fingers, she gently massaged her scalp. Throwing on her coat she kept her hair down to give her head some rest. Wearing wigs was horribly uncomfortable.

Turning to the dirty mirror that hung on the far wall, she rubbed off the bright pink blush and eye shadow. Seeing her face back to normal, she took a moment to examine herself. Tired eyes stared at her, and a mouth that was set in a hard line frowned under scrutiny. Grabbing at her loose hair she inwardly groaned. It was already past her shoulders again. She would have to cut it. Zipping up her coat, Kaoru glanced at her watch and headed back into the heart of the restaurant. She smiled at her luck. Working fast on her back of the house duties, Kaoru was leaving a half hour earlier than she had thought- hopefully she wouldn't see Gary on her way out.

Weaving through the half filled restaurant she paused as Misao darted in front of her.

"I can't believe you get to go home already!"

Misao pouted, and Kaoru couldn't help but raise her eyebrows.

"Yeah, but I was also wearing the ugliest costume ever."

The younger girl chewed on her braid again, and Kaoru fought the urge to scold her like a child. It was funny how much a person could adapt and change over four years. She truly had fulfilled a role that hadn't been a part of her only a short while ago.

"Hey Kaoru? Guess what I just found out!"

Misao's high voice broke through Kaoru's thought, and Kaoru smirked at the child like quality that entered Misao's voice.

"What?"

"You know that guy I was telling you about? The incredibly perfect one?"

Kaoru chewed on her lip and thought back. Misao talked so much that at times Kaoru tuned her out. And she was always changing subjects. But, yes, she did remember the mentioning of a guy. Where had she met him again? Oh yes, he had stopped in here a night she hadn't been working. Misao had described him as- tall, gorgeous, and…stoic? For some reason Kaoru couldn't imagine Misao with anyone calm.

"He's in town on business! He's coming by tomorrow after my shift to pick me up!"

"Okay."

Kaoru laughed inwardly at the girls rampant enthusiasm. She was practically bouncing off the walls.

"I want to introduce you to him!"

Misao ignored a customer trying to get her attention and pulled pleadingly at Kaoru's hand. Kaoru gave the customers an apologetic glance. What did it matter if she met him? Misao was probably just trying to show him off. She was so silly like that. Groaning at the doe eyed look Misao batted at her, Kaoru shook her head.

"Fine, just…go help them."

The girl beamed before scampering off, singing softly under her breath. She gave the customer a dazzling smile, and he grinned back. Shaking her head at the younger girl's antics, Kaoru pulled open the door and stepped out into the night. The brisk air bit at her skin and she pulled her coat closer, walking hurriedly down the familiar street. Passing under a street light, she fixed the bag on her shoulder and continued. Although dark out, the stylish area was filled with people milling about. Passing by a club entrance, she recognized the song pounding out of the front doors. Pushing away the memories that seemed to be calling at her, she turned and headed down to a residential area.

Setting a brisk pace, Kaoru walked with familiarity deeper into the neighborhood. It wasn't the best neighborhood, but the area was safer than many others. Chicago. She had always wanted to visit the place when younger. Something about the old musical that seemed to give the city a magical gleam. After living in Florida for two years, she'd been sick of sun, the heat, and the bugs. She thought that they both had to be. Sano had warned her not to stay in one place for to long, so she'd picked up and moved to Chicago. Of course, starting again was hard- but she had managed to save up a little. And of course Chicago wasn't all that she had wanted it to be. No place seemed to be anymore.

But she had more than many other people did. Although she had lost so much, she was still blessed. And she thanked God for that. Turning the last corner, she stepped up the apartment complex's stairs and stepped out of the cool night. At this time, the building was fairly quiet, the sounds of her neighbors punching through the thin walls quietly. Stopping in front of her door, she straightened the number 107 on the outside. The door was chipped and the wood stain old and fading. The light of the hallway pulsed irregularly, and Kaoru wondered how long it would last.

Pushing open the door, she walked through the kitchen and stepped into the living room. Slightly peeling wallpaper clung to the walls, and an old couch sat against the far wall. Toys littered a corner of the room, and a lamp shed light on pictures taped close to the bottom of the wall. Setting down her bag, she was happy to be home.

A small bundle of energy tore through the hallway and latched tightly to her leg before she could blink. Reaching down, she picked him up and held him close. He smelled like soap and bubblegum.

"Guess what I did today Mommy?"

Kenji's voice was clear and pure as a bell. Looking down at his pajama clad form, she brushed her fingures through his soft red hair. Intelligent eyes looked curiously into hers, and Kaoru pulled him even closer. His was just as beautiful as his father.

"What did you do?"

The tightness in her back and fatigue in her muscles seemed to lessen with him so close.

"Mary and I fingerpainted, and then she read me a story, and then I got a cookie, and then she told me another story! The stories were really good, and I painted a picture for you."

His eyes glittered, and Kaoru grinned at her son. He pulled gently at her hair, and rubbed his cheek affectionately against hers. Setting him down gently, she tugged gently on his nose.

"Kenji, you know that you should be in bed, right?"

He nodded, twisting his fingers in his pajama shirt.

"I wanted to see you before I went to bed. Did you work hard? You look tired."

She watched him as he fidgeted. Kaoru had gone to the doctor weeks after disappearing, a bad case of the flu behind the visit. Florida was hot and humid, and she was sure the change of climate had caused the illness. The clinic had been small and set up for low income families. She had never expected anything. Never expected to find herself pregnant. To say that she had been shocked would be an understatement. Kaoru had been so distraught the doctor had given her something to calm her nerves. He had suggested an abortion, telling her that it was safe and more common than people thought.

She abhorred the idea. No way could she destroy something that the two of them had created. This child was meant to be treasured and cared for. It was a part of her, a part of Kenshin. For weeks after she debated telling him. Kenshin should know, Kenshin needed to know. As her stomach stretched and the small body within her developed, Kaoru fought violently against herself. If she told him- wouldn't it get worse? He would willingly destroy himself for her- but for a child? Kaoru thought back to the incident that still left a small scar on her shoulder and shuddered. She would protect him, even if it was from himself.

So never told him.

A week before her due date she finally broke down and told her family. Calling from a pay phone, she spoke so quickly and quietly that her brother Yahiko could only listen. She hadn't spoken to him since she left, and broke down sobbing. That time had been the most terrifying in her life. The call only lasted a couple of minutes, but it was one of the happiest memories she had. The day she gave birth to Kenji, her brother held her hand.

_"You can do it Kaoru- push!"_

She'd met with him twice more over the next few years, Sano tagging along the last time.Yahiko made a great uncle and Kaoru thanked God for him. Kenji loved him to death.

During the visits Yahiko repeatedly pestered her on why she wouldn't just come home, but she had kept silent. At his last visit, he'd finally gotten the hint. With time passing, she wasn't sure if she became more or less comfortable with him visiting. Kaoru was still spooked that Kenshin would figure out where she was.

"Alright Kenji, I'm home now- go get to bed, I'll tuck you in after I say goodnight to Mary."

He scampered to his room, and Kaoru watched him go. The babysitter Mary emerged from his room, pulling on her coat as she walked. Mary was a wonderful girl. A junior in high school, she lived down the hall and loved kids. She didn't charge too much, and Kenji liked her. Pulling out her purse, she grabbed fifteen dollars.

"Thank you so much for tonight, he wasn't a problem was he?"

Mary laughed, her short hair bobbing as she did so.

"Kenji? No, he was an angel like always."

"You can still come tomorrow?"

Kaoru's work schedule was hectic. It seemed next to impossible to make enough money to survive on. But she would provide for Kenji, and so she did the impossible. Mary was the standard babysitter, and Kaoru tried her best to make sure that Kenji was left with someone she trusted.

"Yeah, no problem. See you later Miss Kia."

Locking the door as soon as Mary left, Kaoru made her way to Kenji's room. Hand drawings covered the wall, small photos of the two of them taped haphazardly in any open space. He lay in his bed, the covers pulled up tightly to his chin and followed her through half closed eyes.

"Hey there little man."

She sat on the edge of his bed, and stroked at Kenji's hair.

"Hey Mom?"

Kenji's voice was soft with sleep. Leaning forward, she kissed his cheek.

"Yeah?"

"Tomorrow can we eat dinner together?"

Kaoru bit at the inside of her cheek. His voice was soft and pleading. Putting a hand to his shoulder, she rubbed it soothingly.

"How about we eat lunch together, and you can eat dinner with Mary again?"

He pouted and clutched his stuffed animal tigertighter.

"I guess."

Tucking the covers around his small body, she turned on the nightlight on his bedside table.

"You know Mommy has to work."

Kenji nodded, and Kaoru watched as tears started to collect in the corner of his eyes.

"I tell you what, how about on Saturday I take you to the zoo?"

"Okay."

His eyes bore into her and Kaoru saw intelligence in them beyond his years. Even though she shielded him as best she could, he still had seen too much in his short life.

"Alright, Saturday you and I will check out the tigers."

Kissing him again on the cheek, Kaoru stood up slowly and walked to the door. Turning off the overhead light she pulled his door mostly closed. Leaning against the wall she listened for his breathing to even out. Once she was certain he was asleep, she trudged across the hallway to the kitchen. Sitting at the table she pulled out her tips and counted them. Reaching behind her into one of the kitchen drawers, she rifled through the stack of bills within and sorted them out. Looking through them, she mentally organized where her money needed to go, and by when. Setting down the last bill, she rubbed her temples and let out a sigh.

She had enough for this month. Kaoru glanced at the clock. It was past one. Leaning in the chair, she cracked her back. With the money not needed for bills, she'd have enough to buy Kenji that new pair of jeans he needed. She'd also be able to get his favorite groceries. Of course, she wouldn't be able to get herself anything really. Not that it really bothered her. Nothing could bother her. She was a mother now, and needed to keep in mind that everything was for him.

Kaoru glanced at the calendar hanging on the fridge. Her mind seemed to slow down, and she shut her eyes. How could she forget what tomorrow was? Scratch that, being that it was one in the morning, what _today_ was. Memories hung at the corner of her mind, and she allowed them to creep in. Wrapping her arms around herself, she could almost feel Kenshin's arms around her.

_"Happy Birthday Kaoru."_

Why was it so hard for her move on? Why was it that whenever she shut her eyes a pair of soft violet eyes glowing with traces of amber would be staring back at her? Why was a day that was supposed to be a celebration, felt like a funeral each time it passed? It was the day he entered her life, the day her world was totally and completely changed. Today. Taking a deep breath, she bit at her lip and took a shaky breath. She'd gotten through it before, it was just a day, she could do it again.

His voice warm and caring would be soft next to her ear. She could practically hear the love in his voice. Kenshin's arms would hold her tightly but gently, clutching her to him until she was happy. She missed it, missed being loved and taken care of by him. It was hard to take care of someone on your own. To be completely unattached and independent. To have someone depend on you for everything. Of course, she loved Kenji. She adored him, and wouldn't ever wish him away. But Kaoru had never expected this, for some reason the noble reason for her living a life of struggle fell short at times when she was thinking.

She hated her birthday. Hated the way so many others could celebrate theirs', when to her all it did was emphasis the fact that she was alone. Kaoru didn't stop the tears that fell down her cheeks. She couldn't wait for today to be over.

* * *


	3. Unexpected Findings

Author's Note- Alright- I think I know where this story is going, so yeah! Continue to tell me what you think- Don't worry, some Kenshin meets Kaoru again action I think will happen in the next chapter…if things turn out how I want them to… maybe (crosses fingers) Oh, and just to let you know- it is reallllyyyy hard to write Aoshi…urgh, the guys like a brick. And on that note, this chapter is full of A/M that just came out of nowhere….urghh…

* * *

General Disclaimer….I don't own anything….I am poor. 

Rating- R/M- What can I say? Nothing wrong with a little more adult….ish…

Things Left Unsaid

Chapter 3

Unexpected Findings

* * *

Aoshi rolled his shoulders at the stop sign. Surrounded by evening traffic, he was glad that he was almost at his destination. Glancing at the clock he took his foot off the brake when the traffic light changed. Aoshi didn't like traveling that much. Especially flying. The noisy people, the annoying and unintelligent workers, and the bad food. Luckily, this trip was for business, and Kenshin had no problem booking him a first class seat. The two hour flight had only been mildly painful. 

To be truthful, he was thankful that Kenshin had asked him to deal with some business in Chicago. They were having problems with the middle management, and Kenshin wanted someone there that he could trust to be objective and no nonsense. Aoshi knew that he could handle the whiny and self absorbed workers easily. After all, he was the right hand man of one of the most powerful men in the nation. He was the most ruthless, efficient, and trusted man that worked for Kenshin. Besides, he needed the calming that bringing chaos to order could bring.

Aoshi helped Kenshin in his upstanding business, and was an active member of Kenshin's not-so-well known dealings. Brushing back a loose lock of dark hair, he thought briefly about their first encounter. Aoshi had been young, but by no means innocent. The fact that he had met up with Kenshin in many ways saved him from himself. They had immediately clicked with one another, a bond forming between the two preferably solitary individuals. He'd been working for Kenshin for over seven years and knew the man and the business like the back of his hand.

Of course, upon their first encounter, Aoshi would never have guessed that Kenshin was a prominent member of Arms Incorporated- an international company that dealt with specialty weapons. Indeed, the fight that he had stumbled into that night had seemed like something out of the mafia world. Walking to his dorm after a late night of playing pool and making some quick cash, he had taken a back route through a couple of alleys, hoping for some time to think. However, he instead found something quite different. Twenty men with guns and swords danced in a deadly and strange battle against someone dressed in black, his sword a blur in the dark passage way. When one of these men decided to accost Aoshi, he had been more than willing to help out the outnumbered man. Aoshi shook his head and let the barest of smiles touch his face, he had been such a fool. Like Kenshin needed the help. That night had irrevocably changed his life, inextricably tying him to the red haired stranger, Kenshin Himura.

_Covered in blood, Aoshi met the eyes of the man next to him. It had been a long time since Aoshi had actually harmed someone, let alone killed them. Who had he risked his neck to save? Golden in color, the man's red hair matched the blood that coated him as well. A violent X shaped scar was prominent on his cheek. The stank of blood and street garbage was overwhelming and Aoshi shut the smells away in an effort to get control of his situation. Stepping over a body, he eyed the fallen men. _

The men that were now a mixture corpses and seriously injured had fought with style and finesse- they were no amateurs. He had just gotten involved in something much bigger than him. Just his luck. Narrowing his eyes he glanced at the only other conscious man. The man's sword hung loosely at his side, and the body fluid that ran along its edge shone darkly in the dim light of the street. Friend or foe? Normally a rational individual, he realized just how much an unexpected amount of rashness could do. The man raised his hand slowly toward Aoshi, and Aoshi felt himself coil tightly. So much for helping a guy out.

"Kenshin."

The man's voice was low and rough. Seeing the gesture for what it really was, Aoshi extended his arm. Shaking hands with him, Aoshi did the only thing he could.

"Aoshi."

Aoshi was shaken out of his memories by a honking horn. Briefly glaring into his rearview mirror, he concentrated on the busy street.

He liked Chicago. The city was classy and hospitable, and gave off a completely different vibe than New York. It was a nice break. Noisy traffic and incapable drivers however seemed to be a problem wherever he went.

Of course, that prestigious company that Kenshin was so entrenched in was where their trouble and their not so savory dealings began. Well, then again, his most recent troubling after starting to work for Kenshin. Aoshi had problems long before the red haired man had entered his life. He could count at least ten different organizations, some legal- some not, that wanted a chunk of Arms Incorporated profits.

Aoshi had met and been recruited by Kenshin at the age of nineteen, Kenshin himself being only twenty, and had been by Kenshin's side as he climbed in the company. Kenshin kept Aoshi close to him throughout every ordeal, and Aoshi was the little known but much respected shadow at Kenshin's side, bringing in connections that even Kenshin hadn't been aware of. After all, Aoshi hadn't been doing nothing before working for Kenshin. Now however, Aoshi wouldn't want it any other way.

He knew Kenshin- the man more like a brother than an employer. That made being away even easier, because he knew that Kenshin needed to be alone today. There would be no scheduled meetings, and Kenshin would more than likely lock himself up with a bottle of liquor. Everyone was aware that on _this_ day, hell this week, being around Kenshin was especially aggravating. He was brooding, short tempered, and sullen. The man had gotten involved with a girl four years ago that still wracked his brain.

Most people weren't aware of who she was, or what exactly had happened to her- but Aoshi knew. Kaoru Kamiya. The girl that had disappeared four years ago. The girl that Kenshin had been totally obsessed and in love with- was still in love with. She robbed his boss of all logical reasoning, made him worried and tense and unhappy. This stupid week every year was almost as bad as the anniversary of when she left. Because today was her birthday, today was the day they met. Aoshi had searched for her for over a year and a half, and knew her face better than he knew his own at times.

He still didn't know how. How that slip of a girl evaded him. Aoshi was the best, and tracking down one woman should have been beyond easy for him. But her trail led to a bunch of dead ends, and no one seemed to know anything about a black haired blue eyed girl named Kaoru. Kenshin didn't blame him. He had gotten angry yes, furious in fact that she was missing, but never told Aoshi that he wasn't trying hard enough. However, that was what Aoshi felt. He often found himself unable to sleep, going over the facts again and again. He must have missed something- he was better than anyone else. It was his job to put his boss back together.

Tapping impatiently on the steering wheel, he examined the people lining the edge of the road. Kenshin was being eaten alive. Year after year, his eyes grew colder and harsher- a deeper and darker gold. He was angry and confused. Aoshi had witnessed how much Kenshin loved Kaoru. Kenshin didn't need to tell him how he felt, because Aoshi could see it as plain as day. When Kaoru and him were dating he was always a bit distracted, always sending Kaoru flowers and notes. Evenings that he used to spend curled up with a book or doing some sort of weapons practice, Aoshi saw him instead going to a movie or dancing with Kaoru. It was the first time Kenshin had gotten so enthralled with a person since Aoshi started working with him. The only time his eyes had stayed violet for so long.

Aoshi blocked thoughts of the missing woman, and instead concentrated on finding a parking spot. He wasn't going to let the past get to him tonight. Eyeing the posh sign above the restaurant, Aoshi pulled his rental car into an empty spot across the street from it. He was lucky to find the parking space. Putting a few quarters into meter, he trekked across the street and into the dark restaurant.

Just after ten, the bar was hopping, while the eating area was mostly deserted. He hoped that meant she would be able to leave sooner. He wanted to catch dessert with her. She loved sweets. Now that he thought about it, most of her kisses tasted like chocolate and caramel. He resisted the urge to sigh at the thought of kissing her and tasting the sweets she enjoyed so much.

A host approached him dressed like a Elvis, and Aoshi started at the bright costume. The first time he was here, he was shocked at the style. Outrageously expensive, the restaurant/bar was lushly decorated, both in decorum and in the uniforms. He had been told that part of the fun in coming to this place was the fact that every server wore a different hand-made costume every night. In his opinion it was gaudy and hideous. He wondered how the servers didn't go crazy.

"What can I do for you sir?"

The host's voice was smart and intelligent- and utterly ridiculous coming out of his Elvis clad attire. Aoshi narrowed his eyes at him, the host was also snide.

"I'm looking for Misao."

He kept his voice level and remained calm on the inside. This foolish man truly found himself important and crucial. Aoshi knew he could easily crush him, but it wasn't worth it.

"Misao? Oh, yes, she's just finishing I think. Would you like me to get her for you?"

Aoshi nodded not bothering to answer verbally. The host tore off into the inner realms of the building, and Aoshi scrutinized his retreating figure. He found himself growing anxious at the prospect of seeing her. Misao.

_"Sir, what can I start you off with?" _

Aoshi frowned at his menu, ignoring the young voice that tried to catch his attention. He'd been in stuffy meetings all day, and was ready to leave. Couldn't businesses figure out how to work with each other without ripping each other's throats out? Unfortunately his plane wasn't scheduled until the morning, and he was stuck in Chicago overnight. Damn Kenshin and his stinginess.

A coworker back in New York suggested the Blue Spot as a classy place to get a meal when in Chicago, and although he wasn't especially interested in anything too 'high class' he also heard that a certain someone frequented here. The one that was becoming a bit more than just a thorn in the side of Kenshin. If Aoshi could confirm that Shishio liked to regular the spot, it could come in handy in the future. Aoshi knew that things with Shishio were growing tense. The skirmishes between Arms more "involved" members and Shishio's men were becoming more frequent and violent. Practically as violent as when he first joined.

"Sir?"

Aoshi dragged his eyes to the server's face, and stopped cold. Dressed as a cowgirl, the woman had thick dark hair pulled into two long braids. She wore jeans that were practically painted on, leather chaps over them-the shirt, hat, and belt buckle all unquestionably western. Hands clasped behind her, her wide innocent blue green eyes bore deeply into him even as the shirt that clung tightly to her chest spoke of something less than innocent. Her body was small and lithe, like a dancer's or a girl's, but she was most definitely a woman. She was stunning, even with freckles painted onto her cheeks.

A pretty blush stained her cheeks, and she watched him with obviously interested eyes. Aoshi felt his heart imperceptibly speed up. She was interested. He grinned inwardly, he was interested. Maybe this trip wasn't wasted after all.

It had been a bit of a rocky start. Aoshi knew that trying to start a long distance relationship was next to impossible. But Misao had been more than willing to try.

Aoshi broke out of his train of thoughts as Misao came toward him. Dressed tonight as a mermaid, he felt his eyes narrow at the costume that revealed her curves. He wondered how many guys had eyed her tonight with less than pure thoughts on their minds.

She wrapped her arms around him, and he held her tight. She didn't even reach his shoulder. Pulling back, she smiled widely at him, but didn't try to kiss him. Misao could read him so well. Inwardly, he was glad that she didn't feel the need to indulge in PDA. He found it on the vulgar side. Stepping away from him, she tugged on an edge of her bright red wig, and looped her arm through his.

"I missed you! How was your flight? I hope it wasn't too horrible. Work tonight was really tough! You know that girl Kia- she really wants to meet you! Can you believe that my manager made me wear this outfit!"

Aoshi blinked at the amount of subjects covered by Misao. Sorting through them, he couldn't help but feel pleasantly overwhelmed. Misao was bubbly and bright, her mouth at times running away with the conversation. The vivid light that she seemed to exude lulled and warmed him like nothing else. But she never pressured him to talk, never grew impatient at how little he did. And when he did talk, she listened and never interrupted. Aoshi just didn't like speaking unless it was necessary. He was glad that she seemed to understand that.

Aoshi followed her as she darted between customers and servers, bringing them to a booth close to the kitchen. He watched her pull at the pins holding her hair up and hidden.

"I'll be right back, I'm going to go change. Don't worry about being bothered, this booth is meant for the workers here."

She squeezed his hand before disappearing behind an unmarked door. Examining his surroundings, he took in various people sitting at the bar and at tables. He didn't recognize any of them. Leaning back, he thought about these next few days. He had several more things Kenshin wanted him to look into, but besides that he could spend some much needed time with Misao. The long distance between them was starting to grate, and he wondered how long it would take to convince her to move up to New York. He was sure he could find her a well paying job, and he'd be more than willing to locate her a college to transfer to. Aoshi was never one to speculate on relationships, but with Misao, he thought that this may be the one relationship he didn't want to end quite yet. Being away from her was aggravating.

Misao exited the back room and swung in next to him. Wearing a pair of tight jeans and a low cut top, Aoshi wondered if she had dressed up for him. His eyes narrowed imperceptibly. She had better have dressed up like that only for him. Running her hands through her hair, she quickly braided it. He smiled inwardly as one of her legs rubbed up against his repeatedly. He could tell she was very glad to see him. Laying her hand over his, she played idly with it, staring intently at his fingers.

"I missed you."

Her admission was soft, her breath dancing over his neck. She leaned into his broad frame, and Aoshi could see how tired she was. Feeling her mold against his side, he couldn't help the tenseness in his body. Without even trying she could turn him on. Not to mention that at this angle it was impossible to not notice the exposing top.

"Tonight was horrible, we had two huge parties that just wouldn't leave."

Her voice was muffled against his body, her exhaustion leaking through with every word.

"Ready to go?"

He spoke quietly into one of her ears. She sighed against him, seemingly closer than before. Feeling her pull away, he watched as she suddenly sprang to life. Where did she get so much energy after being so obviously exhausted?

"Aoshi, we can leave in just a second- I want you to meet Kia first."

He watched Misao disappear into the kitchens, her long braid trailing behind her. Aoshi let out a sigh. Maybe dessert wasn't the best idea. Misao didn't need any more sugar. And who was Kia again? Oh yes, Misao had mentioned her several times when talking to him. A coworker of hers, Misao had gabbed on and on about the sweet single mother that was shy and a great listener. Aoshi had to admit he was interested in this woman that had grabbed his girlfriend's attention. Anyone that could handle Misao had to have something special. Misao reemerged a few minutes later, dragging a woman behind her by the hand. Stopping in front of him, Misao pulled the woman to her side.

"Misao!"

The woman dressed as an Arabian princess was covered in purple and veils. Her voice was annoyed, but still soft and slightly reserved as she tugged at her clasped wrist.

"I have stuff that needs to get done Misao! You know I don't like meeting new people."

Misao ignored her and the slightly desperate edge to her voice, and the woman groaned, her shoulders slumping in defeat. Misao grinned triumphantly at Aoshi, before gesturing toward the girl, then at him. The woman turned toward Aoshi, and he could barely make her forced smile out underneath the multitude of veils on her face.

"Hi, I'm Kia, Misao has told me so much about you."

"Aoshi. Nice to meet you."

The woman turned back to Misao, obviously unhappy.

"Can I go now Misao? Gary is going to be furious if he catches me just standing here."

Aoshi watched Misao's shoulders rise in anger.

"Kia, if you going to introduce yourself the least you can do is let him see your face! You look like some scary Arabian assassin or something!"

Kia put a hand to her head, obviously frustrated, and Aoshi felt himself almost chuckle. The two of them were practically acting like children. Especially Misao. He wanted to kiss that anger out of her.

"Fine."

She turned to Aoshi, her hands already unwrapping the veils on her face.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to be so rude, I'm just really busy right now, and I was hoping to leave early. Today is sort of an unlucky day for me."

He nodded his head at Kia's admission. So today was unlucky for someone else besides Kenshin? He supposed weirder occurrences had happened. Misao could be oblivious of other people's feelings at times. Aoshi would mention it to her later. It was clear that Kia felt awkward and just wanted to leave the situation. He didn't want to give the server any more trouble than what she already was dealing with. The last of her veils came undone, and her face suddenly became clear.

"Sorry again for being so unkind."

Aoshi felt his world tilt. An occurrence indeed. Pretty blue eyes on a palette of nearly translucent skin was framed in dark hair. Her gaze was apologetic. A small mouth pulled itself into a worried half smile underneath a well shaped nose. He had burned that face into his memory. Kaoru Kamiya. It couldn't be possible. Wasn't possible. And yet, there she was- the one thing that he had been desperately searching for right under his nose. Schooling his rampant thoughts, he immediately clamped down on any outwardly reaction. They had never met in person, and he hoped desperately that she didn't recognize him from any of the pictures in Kenshin's home. She rubbed at one of her shoulders, her body language tired, but still unguarded. She didn't know.

Glancing at her once more, he took a closer inspection of her form. Kaoru had matured these last four years, a sort of refinement coming to her previously young face. She hadn't gained or lost a significant amount of weight, and besides the signs of fatigue she showed, seemed in good health. Immediately he pulled up any memories of Misao mentioning 'Kia'. His mind went blank. He needed to talk to Misao. He didn't like the idea of using her for information, but he was certain that Kaoru wouldn't give up so easily.

"Please, don't mind Misao- she's just a little excited."

His voice came out slightly detached, but he was shocked on the inside.

"It's no problem really. I'll see you later Misao. Nice to meet you."

"Wait!"

Misao grabbed at Kaoru's hand. Aoshi watched the girl stop, a look of confusion on her face. Misao reached into her back pocket and pulled out a slightly wrinkled envelope.

"I heard from Gary that today is your birthday."

Thrusting the envelope into Kaoru's hand, Aoshi watched the color drain from her face. Her hands shook slightly, and Kaoru quickly slid the envelope into one of her costume's pockets. She blinked repeatedly, and Aoshi saw the tears collecting in the corners of her eyes. Misao, oblivious as always, sat down next to Aoshi again.

"I wasn't sure what to get you, and I don't have a lot of money right now, so I hope you like it. Its just a silly card that reminded me of you. Do you wanna go out tomorrow or something?"

Kaoru nodded 'no' absently, her hands now wringing the front of her costume viciously. She looked away from Misao.

"I don't really celebrate my birthday."

"What? Why not?"

Misao's voice was childish and pouty. The woman loved celebrating. Birthdays, holidays, she would celebrate "National Sandwich Day" if she knew the date. Aoshi placed a hand on Misao's shoulder, it wouldn't be good for her to push this. Like Kenshin, Kaoru undoubtedly associated today with their meeting. Kaoru took an unsteady breath, a forced smile on her face.

"It just seems a bit silly to me, but thank you for the gift. I have to go."

'Kia' waved once more at them, before rushing back into the kitchen. Aoshi couldn't help but watch her go. He finally had found her. Finally.

Looping his arm with Misao's, he led them out of the restaurant and to his car, his mind spinning with thoughts. Pulling out into traffic, his mind relaxed slightly as Misao placed her head on his shoulder. Wrapping his free arm around her shoulders, he kissed the top of her head.

"She seemed nice."

He watched Misao start out of the world she had been lost in. She glanced up at him, and he felt his heart clench. Her hair was coming undone, and strands stuck to her face.

"Kia? Yeah, she's a doll- real sweet."

"How did you two meet again?"

"Um…Well, she started about two years ago or so. Real quiet, but I was determined to get to know her. I mean, she's one of those women that doesn't go out much."

His interest was more than captured.

"Why's that?"

"I don't know. She doesn't like to talk about herself period. I'm lucky if I can get her to divulge something about Kenji."

"Kenji?"

Shit, if she was dating someone there would be a big problem. He didn't even want to think about the possibility of her being married.

"Oh you remember, I told you she had a son right?"

Aoshi couldn't help his racing heartbeat. That's right. Misao had mentioned several times that she was raising a son. Kaoru had a son. The question was, whose was it? What had Kaoru been doing these last four years?

"How old is he?"

"He's just over three. The most darling kid ever. Kia once showed me a picture of him- bright red hair, and the cutest face! Man, you should see him, I am so jealous! I asked her about the father, but she clammed up right away. Probably some dead beat guy that dumped her when he found out. Guys like that really piss me off! No wonder Kia is so jumpy and untrusting!"

Just over three years old? Aoshi had looked extensively into Kaoru, knowing all aspects of her being a part of the job. Kenshin had been her first boyfriend. She didn't like to date, and was awkward and nervous around men she didn't know. She was not the type to have a fling. With a three year old child, there was no father in the picture. And with Kenji's age, not to mention his hair coloring, that could mean that…Oh God. That could mean- Kenji was...Aoshi felt himself go numb.

Fuck. He was not expecting this.

"Aoshi, are you alright?"

Misao's voice was filled with concern. Taking a deep breath, he attempted to calm down. He hadn't been such an internal mess in a long time. He would need to call Kenshin.

Misao twisted in his grip and kissed at his cheek, moving one of her hands to his chest.

"Aoshi."

Her voice was low and seductive. She nibbled at his ear, and Aoshi struggled to keep the car straight. It really had been too long since he held Misao in his arms.

"You can tell me if something is bothering you, you know that right?"

He could feel her breath on his ear and her heart pounding rhythmically against his chest. She stilled her movements and waited for some sort of sign. Aoshi wanted to tell her everything, but there was so much to tell. Aoshi worried about scaring her off. He had an awful past, a past full of things that he was afraid would hurt Misao. He couldn't just force the whole thing onto her at once. Aoshi had started revealing more minor details, but not even he was ready to expose everything yet. Pulling her closer, he swung into the parking lot of his hotel.

"It's fine Misao, just work. Is your roommate expecting you home tonight?"

"No I told her you were coming to visit. She wont worry about me."

Stepping out of the car, they walked into the lobby. Checking in, he couldn't help but notice the sly stares Misao sent in his direction. Stepping down the hall and into the room, Aoshi felt a bit of his control slip. Grabbing Misao, he pushed her against the room's entry way wall and kissed her breathless. Allowing his hands to roam her shape, he admired and worshipped the small curves of her body. She responded with fervor, her quick hands fumbling with buttons on his shirt, even as her head rolled back and she moaned low in her throat. He let his hand slip under her shirt. She was the most passionate woman he had ever met.

"Aoshi."

Her voice was weak and breathless. Misao pushed gently on his shoulders and he ceased his ministrations. Looking down at her, he admired her swollen pouting lips, and noticed that her top was now dangerously askew. He let himself admire the more than fair amount of cleavage showing. His breath sounded heavy in his ears. She drove him crazy.

"I feel gross from work, do you mind if I jump in the shower quick?"

Did he mind? Yes, yes he did. It took all his self control not to tear the clothes from her body and finish this against the wall. Looking at her though, he could see it immediately. The dirt smudges on her face, the scent of food that clung to her skin. Carerully bringing his body under control, he pressed his forehead against hers.

"You are such a tease."

"You like it."

She giggled before ducking out of his hold and shutting herself in his bathroom. A second later he heard the shower and fan turn on, followed quickly by a loud and rather bawdy song. Images of her in the shower darted into his mind, and he shoved away the urge to break down the door. Stepping deeper into the room, Aoshi shrugged off his coat and hung it on the desk chair.

The hotel room was nice enough, and he was thankful that Kenshin made sure he wasn't stuck in anything too terrible. Besides the corner desk, a queen sized bed flanked by two bedside tables occupied most of the space. A large window with thick drapes framed the skyscrapers that towered toward the sky. Throwing his light travel bag onto the bed, he sat down on the edge of it and fished his cell phone out of the front pocket. Misao struck a particularly high note, and Aoshi couldn't help but cringe. She was not the best singer out there.

Dialing the phone quickly, he waited for the telltale sign of the call being picked up. This was not going to be an easy call. Aoshi was glad Misao was preoccupied for a few moments, he wasn't sure what Kenshin would say. He shut his eyes in exasperation. Today's date seemed to be a cruel joke.

_Today is sort of an unlucky day for me._

Her voice had been tired and tight, a heavy weight in her words. It was obvious that she wasn't over it. Obvious that this time away from Kenshin hadn't been easy for her. When Misao had brought up Kaoru's birthday, he had been certain she would break down. Maybe this wouldn't be as hard as he thought. Aoshi rubbed at his temple. Who was he kidding, she had avoided Kenshin for four years- there was no way that this could be as easy as it seemed.

He wondered what Kenshin would think of the coincidence. What an unlucky and lucky day today was turning out to be.

One thing was certain however- With this unexpected finding he would undoubtedly see Kenshin in the next twenty four hours. And so would Kaoru.

The ringing stopped.

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AN- Alright guys, I'm really sorry that this chapter is so short. In fact, it might be two chapters now until K and K meet up again…I'm sorry! Its just that this next scene is pretty heavy, and I just don't have the energy to do it right now, and do it well. And, I also didn't want Aoshi to just 'find her' in like two sentences, there isn't any characterization or anything if that's done! It would seem weird and awkward. I promise that this will be the shortest chapter I ever post. Please don't hate me! Also, school is out for me on April 29- so after that updates should happen lots faster! Plus, I have been reading through the last few chapters, and catching a few grammatical errors- I'll fix them as soon as I can- thank you for your patience!

Um... And while you're reading this... you might as well review... (wink wink)


	4. Changes

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Author's Note- Kenshin's back! Again….I'm sorry for the lateness… (hangs head in shame) I know… I am a horrible person….still though, you should review…I'm just saying…I was looking at the past chapters and for some reason I feel like I've written more chapters than I actually have…funny. Also, I simply could not edit this again...so, sorry for any errors in advance! 

BTW- Someone mentioned that this reminded them a bit of a story by Ravyn…I didn't intend that in anyway- However, Ravyn is a freak'n awesome writer- and if you enjoy K/K- look the author up! After reading this that is….(and reviewing)

PS BTW- To the reviewer that was hoping for a B-Day present….Happy Belated Birthday! (I hope that this better than nothing…I tried really hard to get this out at at least a half decent date)

A quick note on Kenshin in the beginning of this chapter. He is emotionally broken. Someone that he cared for desperately has been missing from his life for four years. (How would you feel?) Not good, that's how.

Also…I know- this chapter is short.

* * *

Disclaimer- Yeah, I own all of it… what, you doubt me? 

Rating- R/M- Kenshin this is all your fault- you and your sexy body.

Things Left Unsaid

Chapter 4

Changes

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Kenshin rolled his head back against the leather chair he was slouched in. Bringing a hand up to his hair, he pulled his fingers haphazardly through his uncombed locks. A wife beater and black loose pants clung to his unmoving frame, his body sprawled out in dejection. The living room was dark, lights from the street outside casting shadows in the otherwise unlit room. Papers littered the floor, and a half filled bottle of scotch rested near Kenshin's feet. His free hand clutched at a once filled glass. Silence echoed dismally through the otherwise empty house, and his breathing echoed in the messy room. An occasional passing car broke through the stillness, its lights briefly illuminating the scene within. He squinted his eyes and turned his head away from the bright light. Taking in a deep breath, he eyed the barely visible clock on the far mantle. 

He only had to suffer for another half hour until this wretched day was over. It only seemed to get harder every year it came. He had tried to divert his mind, practicing and going through his forms for much of the morning- Idly flipping through television channels in the afternoon- and finally succumbing to the call of liquor in the evening. She still weighed heavily on his mind. Rolling his head back, he stared blankly at the ceiling above him. Ignoring it completely, Kenshin's mind skipped and replayed memories chaotically, the taste of scotch still in his mouth. Lifting the glass to his lips, he frowned unconsciously at the now empty container. He couldn't remember drinking it.

Absently rolling his shoulders, he leaned forward cradling his head in his free hand. He could make it these last thirty minutes. He had to. Dropping the empty glass onto the carpeted floor, Kenshin couldn't help the overwhelming feeling of despair that blindly blanketed him. It crawled down his throat and ate away at his insides. Where was she? Was she okay? That thought perpetually rested in the back of his mind. That he would be sitting there in his comfortable living room, while in another place she was miserable and hurt.

Glancing up at the mantle, his eyes stared hard at a photograph that was barely discernable through the dark. Kaoru. He didn't need good light to know what the slightly faded and very worn photograph held. It was one of his favorite photos of her. Dressed in blue, she sat in one of their favorite fast food restaurants, looking too pretty to be real. A soft smile lit up her face, and her windblown hair lay loosely on her shoulders. A large sundae rested in front of her.

_"Kenshin, there isn't any way I'm going to be able to eat all of this." _

Of course, she had been right- but he had been more than willing to help. Even if more ice cream ended up on her nose than in her mouth with his help. Kenshin smiled at the memory. She was too cute when she pouted. Her voice had been lilting and sweet, both eager and playful. Shutting his eyes, he let himself fall deeper into the memory. She laughed out loud, the sounds of the other customers fading from Kenshin's mind. Her whole body shook slightly with the chuckle, and Kaoru reached across the table, threading her hand in his. The soft smell of jasmine reached his nostrils, and he could see his future reflected back at him in her eyes.

_"Kenshin, you shouldn't tease me!"_

_Her voice was mischievous, and Kenshin felt her foot underneath the table slid up then down his leg. Kenshin smirked in the booth, a shiver of pleasure coursing through him. Every touch from her could drive him crazy. He was glad that he had rescheduled his five o'clock meeting to bring her out for dinner. With work being as stressful as it was, he wasn't able to see her nearly enough for his liking. She had been ecstatic when opening the door and seeing him there. He loved being the cause of her happiness. _

_Bringing a spoonful of ice cream up, he offered it to her, his mind waiting for the perfect opportunity. Giving him a distrustful look, Kaoru brushed her loose hair back and leaned forward, opening her mouth for the sweet confection. She looked delectable, and he had another sort of dessert immediately come to mind. He pushed the fantasy away. Seeing his chance, Kenshin purposely missed, letting the ice cream smear on her lips and cheek._

_He watched her eyes open wide as the cool treat touched her skin. _

_"Kenshin!"_

_Kaoru's voice was shocked and amused at his antics. She grabbed at a napkin, and Kenshin quickly covered her hand with his. His smirk grew as she blushed and pulled on her hand briefly, before keeping it still. She met his eyes warily, and he mischievously met them back. Leaning toward her, he let his free hand rest on her clean cheek. _

_"Let me get that for you."_

_Reaching his body over the table, he dragged her closer to him. Glad that they had chosen a booth near the back, he ignored her startled gasp. Using licks that would be appropriate for an ice cream cone, Kenshin thoroughly cleaned the dessert off of her. She shivered at his touch. Once her cheek was sufficiently washed, he kissed the remaining treat on her lips away. She tasted delicious, and allowing himself the pleasure, he slipped around to her side of the booth. _

_Pressing her against the back wall, he deepened the kiss and let his tongue tangle with hers. His hands skimmed over her frame as her body twisted gently against his, her hands fisting themselves in his hair. Her moan of pleasure shook Kenshin back into a logical state, and he carefully disengaged himself from her. _

_He hadn't expected things to go so far. He knew she wasn't ready mentally to take their relationship to the next level, even if physically she wanted him just as much as he wanted her. Baby steps… he had to remember that Kaoru was more than likely confused and filled with conflicting emotions. Not to mention that they were in a public restaurant and he didn't like anyone else seeing her passionate nature. Giving her one last chaste kiss on the lips, he pulled back and let her rest her head on his shoulder. That of course didn't change the fact that as soon as he got home a cold shower would be in order. A very cold shower. Kenshin couldn't wait until she was ready._

_He could feel her heavy and rapid breathing on his neck, and her hands clutched at his dark t-shirt. Kenshin couldn't help the surge of male pride at her lingering reaction. Stroking her back through her shirt, he attempted to soothe her tense and sensitive body. He tilted her head so that her eyes met his._

_"We should go out for ice cream more often."_

_Kaoru's blush grew exponentially. _

How adorable she had been, how innocent and trusting. He hadn't thought that a woman like her could even exist. But she had existed, and although he had desperately tried to protect her and keep her near him, the best thing that had ever happened to him had slipped through Kenshin's fingers. Where had he put that alcohol again?

Stooping forward, he poured a full glass of the burning liquid. Taking a deep drink, he held the glass loosely. There would never be enough alcohol to drown his need for her. This drink tasted as bitter as she had tasted sweet. Kenshin took another long swallow from the glass, the liquor taking away the raw edge of his emotions. His slight buzz was the only thing keeping him from going out and beating the shit out of some ruffian to calm himself down.

Kenshin gazed at the mantle once again, and wondered where she was at this moment. Was she thinking of him? Did she ever think of him? Or had she moved on? Did she let someone love her as he had loved her? Rage welled up within in, an anger that he didn't try to quell. If someone else was touching her, he would kill them. She wouldn't betray him like that, would she? Then again, she had betrayed him once already. Kaoru had left him to fight his demons alone.

Hearing a sharp noise, he looked down at his hand clutching the glass. The cup had cracks in it from being held so tightly. Feeling disgusted with himself, he threw the glass against the wall. It shattered, shards of glass and scotch falling onto the pristine carpet. He left it. Kenshin felt fury boil up inside of him. What the fuck had she been thinking? He loved her, needed her! She kept him sane, and had finally given him a purpose. And then she had left? Without a word, without a phone call… she was gone! Why? Didn't she realize that it was his job to protect her? Didn't she need him? The anger suddenly dissipated, leaving him feeling empty and despondent. How could she have done it? Didn't she love him?

"Kaoru."

His voice sounded in the still night, caressing the name as one would a lover. He truly was a broken man. What he would do to hear her voice again, to run his fingers through her soft hair, to feel her skin pressed against his. Shuffling up, he walked stiffly to the mantle, clutching at the photograph on it. Kaoru smiled up at him, and he ran his fingers over her face. He realized the truth, recognized it for what it was, and didn't hide from it. He loved her, he needed her, and he wouldn't be whole again until she was by his side.

"Happy Birthday Kaoru."

Bringing the photo up to his face, he gently kissed the image of her. He felt as if he could cry, but he had shed all those tears long ago. Turning the photo over, he pulled out a piece of paper inside the envelope taped to the back. Gently clasping the worn paper, he gazed at the handwriting. The words had almost completely deteriorated away. The letters were soft and curvy, the total opposite of the cutting sentences that they formed. Bringing the letter closer to his face, he breathed in her scent. Jasmine. It still clung to the letter, and for that he was glad.

Putting the letter back, he returned the photo to the mantle. He needed to get some sleep.

Stepping into the hall, he entered the bathroom without bothering to turn on the light. Opening the bottom drawer, he pulled out a hair tie. He didn't need the light to know what hair tie it was either. Lavender in color, it was a good luck charm that he would rather cut off his own arm than lose. The fact that a light purple hair tie was worn by one of the most influential men in the nation during every business deal was never mentioned after the first time. That man had been cleaning urinals for six months. Securing his hair, Kenshin stepped into his bedroom. Shrugging out of the shirt, he left it on the floor. Dropping into the unmade bed, he turned onto his side. Shutting his eyes, a vision of Kaoru danced behind his eyelids.

Kenshin slipped into a light sleep, his mind racing off into full fledged fantasy. Images of the night he and Kaoru had spent together so long ago replayed themselves in his mind, the feelings vivid. _Kaoru writhed beneath him, her sweat soaked body brushing up against his, her harsh breath sweet music to his ears. Her hair spread itself over his pillow, a dark curtain of silk, and her body arched gracefully brushing up against his. The diamond around her neck winked playfully in the dim light, proclaiming her his. He smirked even as she gasped than moaned in pleasure, her hands intertwining themselves in his hair as he-_

He stirred out of his fitful sleep quickly, staring up at the ceiling through the dark. Covered in sweat, he took deep breaths in an effort to calm his body. He missed her more than he thought bearable. And that night had haunted more dreams than he could recall. It was both the one thing keeping him sane, and the one thing slowly driving him into madness. The phone rang loudly, and Kenshin cursed. That was what had disturbed him. He didn't bother to move, letting it ring again and again. Who would call him today of all days? Everyone that knew anything about him, knew not to call today. Today was the one day he allowed himself to sink into self destructive despair. The obnoxious noise sounded again, and he clutched his pillow, furious at the intrusion. Today was their day. He didn't want to deal with anyone else but her memory! Couldn't he at least have that peace? It rang again, and Kenshin growled low in his throat.

Throwing the blankets from the bed, he stomped over to the phone. Ripping it up, he didn't bother to disguise his anger.

"What!"

"It's me."

Kenshin recognized the voice on the other end immediately. But why the fuck was Aoshi calling him today at this time? Aoshi knew better than anyone that today was not the day for house calls or any other obnoxious shit. If there was some sort of problem, Keshin didn't care what Aoshi did, as long as he took care of it. Kenshin undoubtedly was aware that Aoshi hated seeing him so depressed, so Kenshin had sent him away for awhile. His girlfriend lived in Chicago, and Kenshin had business there that needed to get done. It had seemed like a perfect project for Aoshi. So why was he calling?

Kenshin didn't bother saying anything. If it was important enough to call, Aoshi would get the hint and either spew his guts or hang up. He felt a slight hesitation from the other man, and frowned. Aoshi was not a tentative man when it came to speech. He would either say something, or wouldn't. It would always be plain and straight to the point. He didn't hide behind flowery words and long speeches. It was one of the reasons they got along so well.

"I found her."

The words came out in a tightly controlled voice, the tension obvious in each syllable. Kenshin felt the words rush over him, a sort of surreal reality taking over. He found her? Was it…could it be…it couldn't be… His heart beat sped up quickly, blood rushing to his head, and he fought the sudden dizziness. Aoshi wouldn't joke about this sort of thing…would he? No, Aoshi wasn't a sadistic bastard. It wasn't like Kenshin was searching for anyone else. And if this was a joke, Aoshi would be in trouble. More trouble than even he could handle.

A dream? Was this whole scenario a cruel joke employed by his sick and twisted mind? Kenshin bit the inside of his lip- hard. Tasting blood, he dismissed the idea.

"Kenshin?"

The voice sounded far away. He thought of another person saying his name. How personal and right she could make it sound. _Kenshin._

"KENSHIN?"

Aoshi's voice had gotten louder than he had heard it in years. Shaking his head, Kenshin attempted to clear his suddenly fragile mind. Steeling himself internally, he pushed away the urge to kill someone.

"Tell me."

His voice came out even and clear, but Kenshin could detect many things in it. Anger, pain, grief….hope- Kenshin hadn't felt that last one for a very long time.

Thankfully, Aoshi cut right to the point.

"She lives in Chicago and is working as a waitress at a restaurant called The Blue Spot. She has been living in Chicago for just over two years. I don't know where she was before taking up residence there. She is in relatively good health and goes by the name Kia. Give me an hour and I will have specifics."

Kenshin's mind spun into overdrive. Kaoru. He glanced at the picture on the mantle, and felt more of his strength returning. No longer did he have to sit idly by, fruitlessly searching and wondering. No, he knew where she was and now all he had to do was go get her. And he wouldn't find rest until rest she was safe with him. Until she was his again.

"I'll be on a plane in less than an hour. When I arrive in Chicago, I want you there. Fax me any and all information you can get before I arrive."

Aoshi made a sound of agreement on the other end of the line, and Kenshin registered a shower in the background. A woman's singing voice was barely discernable. It must be the famous girlfriend.

Dismissing the noise, Kenshin began to mentally make lists of everything that needed to be done before he left. Realizing that Aoshi was still on the phone, Kenshin stopped his tasking.

"Anything else Aoshi?"

"Well…" Kenshin couldn't believe it. Aoshi sounded more than tentative, he sounded genuinely worried, "There is something else… That is, Kaoru isn't living by herself."

Kenshin's blood ran cold, and he felt a murderous rage surge forward. He would kill the bastard. Break each bone individually until he begged for release. His screams would be a symphony to him. How dare anyone touch her. She was his.

"Kenshin… Kaoru has a son."

The words hung in the air, and Kenshin felt his stomach drop.

"What?"

His voice sounded odd to his ears. Strained and empty.

"I think it's yours."

A heaviness settled onto Kenshin's chest. He dropped the phone.

* * *

Kaoru rolled over, the sheets on her bed bunching tightly around her legs. The fabric clung possessively to her form like a lover, every movement entrenching her deeper into it. Ignoring the scratchy material, she pulled at her equally bunched up tank top. Resting her hand lightly on her stomach she turned onto her back. Drawing circles around her belly button, she let her hand trail up her body and to her neck, unconsciously touching a piece of jewelry she rarely removed. The lone diamond twinkled in the morning light, casting bright colors on the ceiling and walls. Scrunching her nose she blew at a piece of hair that rested annoyingly on her cheek. It didn't move, and Kaoru tilted her head in an effort to make it shift. 

Throwing a hand across her eyes, she tried to shut out the light streaming in through the window. The heaviness of sleep still clung stubbornly to her body, and she stretched out in an attempt to combat the lethargic feeling. Turning away from the window, Kaoru snuggled deeper into her pillow, clutching at the fleeting feeling of detached bliss. She needed more mornings like this. Too bad she rarely allowed herself the pleasure of a natural awakening.

A shadow fell over her face, followed by a soft giggle. Kaoru smiled inwardly, and pretended not to notice the intruder. She supposed it was about time to get up. The edge of her bed dipped, and she felt a slight weight settle next to her. A small hand pushed gently against her shoulder, followed by another less subdued laugh. The figure burrowed at her side, this time tugging gently at her hair.

"Mom?"

Kenji's voice was soft.

"Mom, are you awake?"

Kaoru kept her eyes shut, acting as if she were still deeply asleep. She felt Kenji settle next to her, resting his head on her shoulder.

"Mom?"

Kenji's voice sounded directly next to her ear. Feigning sleep, she rolled in his direction, catching his small body beneath her own. Opening her eyes, she stared down at the young boy, her dark hair creating a curtain around their two faces. He was still clad in the dark blue sailboat pajamas she had gotten him last Christmas. Kenji looked darling, his hair frizzy and tangled from a night of sleeping. His eyes squinted at her, the young boy obviously deep in thought.

"You were pretending weren't you!"

His voice was indignant and loud in her still close ear. Kaoru winked down at her son before pulling herself into a seated position next to him. She watched him sit up and cross his arms, a childish expression of anger on his face. Smiling at her son, she swooped her arms out and pulled him to her body.

"Don't frown Kenji!"

She cooed loudly into his ear, unable to be unhappy with her son so bright and wonderful. Holding him tightly to her, she hummed under her breath and rocked him in his arms. He squirmed against her, and she changed tactics. Kaoru set him back onto her unmade bed, and let her fingers find his most ticklish spots. He giggled, then laughed, his entire face flushing and lighting up the room with its glow. She couldn't help but smile back at his excited expression and half hearted attempts to escape his mother. Ceasing her attack, she helped her son into a sitting position.

"Alright Kenji, go into the kitchen and decide what we're going to have for breakfast."

She patted his head affectionately. The red haired boy nodded vigorously in agreement before scampering off the bed and out of the small room. She could hear him opening up the lower cabinets, searching for the box he knew was essential in the production of pancakes. She never claimed to be a great cook, indeed, Kaoru never even claimed to be fit enough to wash dishes- However, through necessity even she had been able to pick up the basics. The last thing she wanted was her son only eating fast food and microwave meals. Not that they never did, and not that she never burned the things she made. But unlike before, only fifty percent of the food she made ended up inedible these days.

Kaoru pulled herself up off the single bed, and let her hands travel through her long hair. Stretching her hands up over her head, she arched her back and felt a satisfying crack. She moved to the small slightly battered looking dresser and picked up a worn looking brush set haphazardly on it. Bringing it through her raven locks, she glanced at her reflection in the mirror above. Wearing only a tank top and underwear, she leaned forward to examine the dark blue circles beneath her eyes.

A light suddenly flashed, and Kaoru glanced down at the source, her eyes freezing. The diamond around her neck shown brightly in the sunrise, instantaneously bringing memories to her mind. The chain felt warm on her neck as if a part of her body and the stone rested snugly on her collarbone. She brought a hand up to the jewel, her fingers caressing the diamond with unspoken love. Kaoru had never attempted to rid herself of the stone, not even in her most desperate times. It was her piece of him. And in some part of her mind, she felt that as long as she still wore the necklace, she was still under his care. He was still thinking of her, still loving and protecting her. Kaoru knew the idea was foolish. Bringing her hand away from the necklace, she took a deep calming breath and met her eyes in the mirror.

"This is my life."

She spoke resolutely to her own reflection.

"This is what it is. So just accept it. Things are not going to change just because you want them to."

Kaoru would live for her son. She would never fall in love again. After all, one couldn't give one's heart away when it belonged to someone else already.

Grabbing a binder, she pulled her hair into a messy braid. On the bright side of things, at least it was no longer her birthday. Another day like that would have killed her. She had tossed and turned most of the night, visions of a red haired man with a wicked smile, a soft laugh, beautiful eyes, and gentle yet strong hands that knew exactly how she liked to be touched running rampant in her mind.

Not bothering to put anything else on, Kaoru went to the bathroom, brushed her teeth, and slid on a pair of shabby black slippers. Stepping out into the kitchen, she caught sight of her son deep within one of the cabinets. Brushing aside her unsettling thoughts, she turned to one of the drawers and pulled out an apron. She slipped it on over her makeshift pajamas.

"Kenji, did you find the pancake mix?"

The boy scurried backwards out of the cabinet, clutching a box in his hand.

"I found it!"

He thrust it toward her, and she took the dry mix from his hands.

"Good job!"

She patted his head and ruffled his hair.

Reading the back, she gathered a large mixing bowl, measuring cups, and whisk. She observed Kenji from the corner of her eye as he opened the fridge and struggled with a carton of milk. Plucking it from his fingers, she poured him a tippy cup, and handed it to him.

Picking him up, she carried him over to the couch in what passed as the living room. Turning on the small television, Kaoru flipped to his favorite morning cartoon. Adjusting the antennae on top, the picture came clearly into focus. He was instantly enthralled.

"Kenji, why don't you go watch your show while I whip us up some breakfast."

Although she loved spending time with her son, she knew that trying to cook while keeping a close eye on him would be impossible. He nodded at her, and she smiled at his dazed unfocused expression. Walking back into the kitchen, Kaoru flexed her fingers and started measuring.

Whisking the batter, Kaoru set the bowl down to find a frying pan. Going through the kitchen cabinets, she sneezed as dust rose up in the usually untouched shelf. Pulling out the seemingly forgotten pan, she rinsed it in the sink then dried it.

A knock sounded at the door, and Kaoru briefly started at the sound. Shaking her head at her own silliness, she turned the stove on low. Leaving the batter on the counter, she wiped her hands clean on her apron and made her way to the door. Mary had said she might stop by today to see when Kaoru wanted her to work next week, but Kaoru hadn't expected her so early.

Yawning slightly, she undid the deadbolt and smoothed back a loose hair. Mary knew that Kaoru wasn't a morning person, she would hopefully forgive Kaoru's untidy appearance. Swinging open the door, Kaoru wondered if Mary might want to stay for breakfast.

"Mary you sure are-"

Kaoru couldn't help the gasp that cut off her sentence.

A man slightly taller than herself with bright red hair swept up into a high ponytail stood at her doorway. Golden eyes with barely there flecks of violet assessed her beneath thick bangs. Wearing a black nondescript long sleeve shirt and a pair of jeans, the man's expression was neutral with an underlying sense of power. His facial features were etched on her heart, and Kaoru took in the subtle changes that time had brought to his features. He was still perfect.

She felt her palms clench and unclench in apprehension, and her heart hammer painfully against her ribs. Kaoru's breath turned ragged, and she was oddly aware that her mouth was still half open. It open and closed like a fish struggling for breath out of water as she fought to find her bearings. This was not happening. The strong scent of ginger reached her, and she felt her eyes grow watery with emotion. What should she do? His presence was overpowering, and Kaoru couldn't decide whether she wanted to take a step forward or back.

"Kaoru."

His voice wrapped itself around her name, sinking down into her bones. It soothed at her sore muscles and made her ache for his touch. Kaoru hadn't realized how much she'd missed his voice, how much she'd missed his presence… missed the way he said her name.

Feeling the blood rush to her head, she didn't fight her sudden urge to faint.

* * *

AN- Alright, if you're reading this…then you might as well review…I'm just saying the button is right there…just do it…you know you want to. Next time- What do you say to someone you haven't seen in four years that you left but still love? Oh, the drama. 

Also- this was kind of weird when I uploaded it- if there are any format problems, please let me know! Thanks!

* * *


	5. Meeting of Kin

Author's Note- Wow. What a wonderful response! So many reviews…I am sooo happy! (Over sixty!) Thank you guys so much! You are all just too good to me! Don't ever stop! Anywho- I briefly struggled with what I wanted to happen in this chapter. It went a different way then I originally thought it would- So, please don't hate me! Cause, you may be tempted…- What should be said, what shouldn't be said, what emotions should rule each character, what in the world should happen exactly…etc… It was a challenge. (After all, I want everything to go smoothly and stuff. Who doesn't!) I hope that you are happy with the results I worked very hard on.

BTW- your reviews really inspire me…thank you again. -grin- Also, sorry about the wait…I just started working again for the summer.

* * *

Disclaimer- Nope…but if anyone wants to give Kenshin and crew to me… I'll accept them... mwhahahaha… sorry. 

Rating- R/M- And it hits the fan. Oh yeah!

Things Left Unsaid

Chapter Five

Meeting of Kin

* * *

(Several Hours Earlier) 

Kenshin shifted in his seat, separating and sorting through the papers spread out in front of him. Rubbing at his temple, he sipped from a hot cup filled with black coffee. Pushing down the last remaining effects of the scotch he had consumed earlier, Kenshin shut his eyes briefly and stretched his legs out. His body was tense with anticipation. Shutting out the loud obnoxious sounds of an airplane in mid-flight, he adjusted the arm sleeves of his shirt and placed his attention on the small table in front of him.

Taking a long gulp of the burning liquid, he noted the small empty plane. Brightly lit, the seats were few and far between, and covered with a dark leather. Tables adorned with bolted on lamps and small mini fridges rested between the seating areas. Two large retractable flat screen televisions were set into the front and back of the planes interior. He eyed the decadence with feelings of disinterest. There were some advantages to being an important member of a company that made billions of dollars a year. One of them being the fact that in the middle of the night he was able to secure a private plane at less than an hours notice.

Taking in the pages surrounding him yet again, he organized and sorted through every detail that was found on Kaoru's life the last four years. He soaked up the information with vigor. He was more curious than he would like to admit about where she had been and what she had done. Once her alias name had been discovered, her trail became much more apparent.

Kia Kanzaka.

He smiled at her choice of name. She still had the same initials. Kenshin wondered if she had done that consciously in an attempt to keep some semblance of her life before. Shifting to the first pile of papers, he sifted through documents chronicling her life before Chicago in Florida. The papers were few and far between, but he was able to piece together some important information.

Firstly, she gave birth in Florida. Aoshi could pull strings like no one else he knew, and the medical documents in front of him only further reiterated his belief in that. The child had been born four days premature, and the birth had obviously been difficult for Kaoru. The documents documented her problems with both the pain medication, and the over twenty hour long labor that had ensued. He screwed his eyes shut at the thought.

More than anything he wished he had been there. Opening his eyes, he gently lifted the birth certificate. Sex: Male. Weight: 7 lbs. 7 oz. Length: 20 in. Kia Kanzaka had been printed and signed under mother, the signature flowing with familiar curves, however the father space had been left simply with a set of initials obviously written in the hand of the mother. K.H. Nothing more. No signature, no explanation.

It clenched at his heart. Although she had never told him that she was pregnant, she had not disregarded or ignored the fact that he was the father. She could have left the slot blank, completely removing him from the role of father. Denying him his right. She hadn't though. He was a father. He was more than certain now. He had a child.

"Kenji."

He spoke the name softly, shaken slightly by the sound. That was his son's name. It was a good name. His son. Controlling the emotions that seemed to want nothing more than to spin out of control, he reminded himself of the task at hand. Once he found them, he was going to need to get to the bottom of Kaoru's disappearance. Not only that, but Kaoru was his to protect, and so was their son. He wondered how long it would take to convince her. Kenshin needed to be a vital part in both her life, and their son's.

Their son.

He was still trying to adjust to the fact that they had created a child together. A child out of their love. So, why had she left? He wondered briefly what his son looked like. Aoshi had said red hair, but what about Kenji's eyes? Were they like his own, or did they mirror his mother's? What was his favorite color? Food? Toy? Was he afraid of the dark? Did he chew on his fingernails when he was nervous? Could he walk without wobbling, and how many dings did he get when learning to walk?

Did he even know that he had a father?

Kenshin pictured Kaoru cradling a red haired child, and his heart clenched painfully. The notion of family sprung to the back of his mind, and he felt a desperate urge to protect and shield those closest to him. He had a family, a real family.

Noticing the slipping control he had on his emotions, he put aside the medical documents. He couldn't afford to let himself lose focus. Sorting through the rest of the documents from Florida, he looked over the places she had lived and worked. The address and amount for rent at the apartment she had resided in for most of her time there made it obvious that she had been struggling. And three weeks after giving birth, she went back to work at a local hair salon as a secretary.

A month after that, she had added a job as a waitress- working three nights a week at a grill and bar called Happy Joe's. Kenshin leaned forward onto one of his hands. Why? Why would she allow herself to struggle so much? Kenshin wanted to provide for her, for them- for the rest of their lives. And she had ignored that and instead worked herself to death to supply the bare minimum.

She had picked up and moved after two years in southern Florida, a bus and train ticket with Kia Kanzaka's signature he had copies of. Why had she moved? He looked over the specs of where she lived now. It seemed better than the first place, but it was still undoubtedly unacceptable. He wouldn't allow her or their son to be in any danger. Her job as a waitress at the Blue Spot paid more than her last job too. It didn't make him feel any better however.

Finishing off his now luke warm coffee, Kenshin picked up the only picture of Kaoru that had been acquired. An employee picture for the Blue Spot, it was taken just after she'd been hired. A black and white photo, her familiar and beautiful features jumped off the page. Hair bobbed just under the chin, her smile seemed slight and forced. He could sense her exhaustion even through the picture. He touched her image with his hand.

She was still enchanting.

Feeling a drop in altitude, Kenshin gathered up the loose papers. Placing them in a folder he put away the coffee mug and reclined his chair. Stretching slightly, he cursed the uncomfortable seats. They would be landing in Chicago within the next thirty minutes. Maybe he could catch a little shut eye before then. Yeah, right.

* * *

Kenshin pulled into the lot, parking the black rental car. The drive to her apartment had been uneventful, the traffic minimal. He guessed that few would be traveling early on a Saturday morning. Shutting the door with a resounding clap, he crossed the street while examining the area. 

The rising sun cast an attractive glow on the otherwise dismal neighborhood. Small pieces of garbage blew haphazardly around, collecting in the street's nooks and crannies. He could taste the pollution that was heavy in the air. The two buildings on either side of Kaoru's apartment were dilapidated, and her own wasn't much better. Two people dressed in scruffy clothes were just visible in the darkest corners of the street. It was unacceptable.

Aoshi had met him at the airport. Not having much more to tell Kenshin, he gave him directions to Kaoru's home. Kenshin had thanked him, hoping that it wasn't too obvious how anxious he was. Aoshi hadn't said anything about his behavior, and Kenshin was glad. After getting the information, Kenshin had sent Aoshi away. He didn't want anyone to be there when he saw Kaoru again. It was just for them. He would call Aoshi later.

Opening the door to the building, he wrinkled his nose at the dank smell of age that hung heavily in the air. Dimly lit, he eyed the worn doors and carpet as he traveled deeper into the building. The hallway lights flickered and flared in the small space. Passing room 101, then 103 and 105, he felt his heart beat quicken. It seemed like only yesterday he had met her. The young woman that was filled with life and energy.

Kenshin walked stealthily, a tightness in each step he took. On his way to a casual meeting with Aoshi, he had opted to walk instead of drive. It allowed him to clear his mind, and walk familiar streets. He rolled his shoulders back and blew a stray hair out of his eyes. Work was hell right now. Kenshin smirked.

Scratch that. Work was always hell.

Kenshin had yet to find himself enjoying more than one or two aspects of his ever growing, ever changing job. That was one of the reasons he hated driving. He wanted to feel like he was part of the real, normal world. As his life continued to delve into a realm similar at times to that of the Twilight Zone, being surrounded by regular individuals and situations was refreshing and strengthening.

Walking through a mostly residential area, he took in the nice houses and cars lining the street. He had to admit that New York had some beautiful neighborhoods. Letting his vision broaden, his eyes focused as they came across a group of people seemingly just lounging. It seemed a bit odd for anyone to be out so late in this sort of area. Eyeing the group he walked around them, giving enough room so that he was unnoticeable. No reason to let his stealth skills go to waste.

The six young men lounged and smoked cigarettes, their conversation slightly harsh in the still evening. One of them laughed loudly, and Kenshin couldn't help but tense at the annoying sound. He could tell that they thought they were pretty 'tough.' He snorted silently. Pathetic. They would undoubtedly cry like babies if anything really dangerous came along. Passing them silently, Kenshin rounded the corner and let them fall from his sight. If he didn't hurry he would be late.

A woman's voice broke the stillness, her voice a mixture of a terrified and angry shout.

Dropping immediately into a defensive stance, he darted back through the street, his senses picking up the location of the noise. He wasn't sure what was going on yet, but he'd be damned if he just let something happen when he could prevent it. Pausing between two cars, he realized the sound had originated near the group of people he had just passed. Feeling his lips draw back into an angry scowl, he quietly drew himself closer to the group.

They had gathered farther down the street, spaced between two dimly lit street lights. The group was drawn up in a tight semi circle, cigarettes forgotten as they seemed to shout out words of encouragement at three of their members who appeared to be struggling. He saw the flash of long dark hair, and his blood grew cold. Scratch that. They were shouting words of encouragement at two of their members who were trying to restrain a woman. It made him sick.

"Don't touch her."

His voice sounded almost like a growl to his own ears. Disgusting pigs- they deserved what they were about to get.

On the offensive, Kenshin quickly ran up behind them, knocking two out with a sharp jab to the back of the neck. Spinning quickly, he took out another young punk with a knee to the stomach and elbow to the back of the head. The guy hadn't even noticed him yet. The last man not struggling with the girl was thrown neatly into a dumpster, his body sagging slightly as it hit the wall next to it first. A couple of swift kicks later, and only him and the woman were conscious.

He approached her carefully, doing his best to seem non-threatening. Who knew what she was thinking. The woman dusted herself off, and pulled herself up into a sitting position. Kenshin took in the short skirt that was wrinkled and skewed, allowing his eyes to briefly glance at the incredibly long legs that it didn't hide.

Her white blouse was ruffled as well, the three top buttons which had been undone, quickly were redone by her slightly shaky fingers. His eyes again focused, this time on her pale smooth collarbone and graceful neck. She stood on trembling feet, and Kenshin forced his physical reaction to her body down. The girl had just been attacked.

"Are you alright?"

His voice betrayed little of the inner turmoil he felt. She kept her head bent, the dark hair held in a ponytail rushing over one shoulder as her bangs hid her facial features from his view. He hoped that nothing had happened to her before he had heard her cries. Taking a step closer to her, he stopped when she visibly flinched. Of course she was scared, and he was more than likely not helping.

"I'm fine."

Her voice was weak and forced, and Kenshin held back his urge to grin. She seemed determined to show no weakness. He liked that.

Her head tilted up, allowing him a good look at her face, and his breath caught. Two expressive blue eyes stared at him, both fearful and challenging, yet still amazingly innocent. Set on a pale face and framed with dark thick lashes, her eyes were complimented with both a cute nose and a pretty kissable mouth- she was radiant. Her dark hair furthered her beauty, strands that had fallen from the securing piece of elastic resting against her cheeks and moving slightly in the cool breeze.

He wanted her.

Taking in her attire again, he inwardly flinched as the pieces came together. The pleated skirt, the white blouse, and the plain black shoes. It was a uniform. The girl was in fucking high school! He clamped down on his raging hormones and resisted the desire to growl in frustration. Shit. He wasn't the kind of guy that robbed the cradle.

"You shouldn't be out here at this time of night. Not dressed like that."

And he meant it. She looked like she had walked out of some guy's fantasy. The one involving the bad school girl that needed a spanking. Pushing the sudden imagery and the effects it had on him out of his mind, Kenshin was shocked at the anger that seemed to envelop her suddenly.

"What!"

Her voice sounded loudly, her hands flying to her hips in indignation. Now that was a sight. The woman's eyes enlarged with barely contained rage, making them sparkle even as her cheeks flushed with emotion. If possible, she was even more attractive. Taking a steadying breath, he scratched at the back of his head. Down boy. He needed to calm her down, and get her to her home. He wasn't going to leave her roaming the streets at this time of the night dressed like that.

Glancing back up at her, he caught her suddenly studying him. Her eyes at the moment seemed to be entrenched in his long red locks of hair. Was that…longing he saw in her gaze? She bowed her head suddenly, and Kenshin nearly jumped at her sudden change in demeanor.

"I'm sorry I've been so impolite. Thank you for helping me."

Wow. That had been unexpected. He gazed down at her bent form, his intrigue amazingly pricked once again. Her emotions were so pure and undiluted. It was a fresh breath of air. Feeling himself calm at her presence, he smiled reassuringly at her. When she smiled back, he felt his heart race.

"It's no problem, let me make sure you get home safe."

She turned and started walking, Kenshin matching her steps and rhythm as they went. He clamped down at the excited feeling he got knowing that he would know where she lived, and concentrated on the streets around them. Letting his senses take in her form, he breathed deeply the scent of jasmine. The scent clung to her body, and was integrated into her very form. Kenshin felt the sudden unexplainable need to bury his head in the crook of her neck in an effort to memorize the sweet smell.

Shaking off the feeling, he wondered exactly why she had been out at this time of night. And why exactly was she dressed like that? He needed to know more about her.

"What were you doing out so late?"

Kenshin asked the question straight out, half sure that she would scoff at him and tell him to mind his own business.

"I was at a party."

Now that was interesting. She had been at a party? This pretty innocent little thing? He was expecting something along the lines of a late science project at school- Not that she had been out boozing with other highschoolers.

"You don't seem like the party type."

And she didn't. With her innocent eyes and independent personality, a party girl he would have never pegged her as. She laughed then. A clear ringing sound that crawled deeply within him and took root. If possible his desire for her grew.

"I'm not really, my friend threw me one for my birthday."

That caused him to start. Her birthday? Kenshin couldn't help the nagging question that unfurled within him. How old was she exactly? She acted mature for a woman still in her teens. Turning his body, he allowed himself the pleasure of looking deeply into her eyes.

"Today is your birthday?"

He felt the naked want in his own voice and noticed the way she shivered under his scrutiny. She looked slightly confused at her own reaction. She really was completely innocent.

"How old are you?"

He asked the question carefully, slightly wary of what her answer would be. He couldn't help the desperate craving he had for her. And if she was legal, she was his.

"Eighteen."

Kenshin felt the wide smile grow on his face, and didn't try to stop it. She smiled hesitantly back, and he realized that she was totally unaware of what had just happened. Then again, he liked the element of surprise. He wanted her, every part of her, and he didn't want to scare her off before it had really begun. So for now, he would hide the intense passion he felt for her, and concentrate on learning everything he could about her.

They arrived at her home a few minutes later. A light inside of the mid sized white house shown brightly in the dark. It seemed that someone was waiting for her to return home safely. She turned to face him, her body trembling slightly under his gaze.

"Thank you, again, for helping me out."

Her voice was soft, soothing, and genuinely thankful. He needed to know this woman's name.

"It wasn't any problem…?"

He wanted her to answer, needed her to answer. Not only would it complete their introductions, but it would also show that she trusted him.

"Kaoru, my name is Kaoru."

Kaoru. He worked the name over in his mind, and found himself repeating it softly back to her. He watched both a blush spread down her cheeks, and a shiver worked its way down her body. Kenshin couldn't help but grin. She was too cute.

"I'm Kenshin."

Her eyes widened slightly at his admission, and he watched her through veiled violet eyes. Kenshin wanted nothing more than to throw her up against the side of the house and kiss her senseless. Instead he held out his hand, and she took it. Shaking hands, he felt the soft skin of her hand within his own, and marveled at how well they fit together. She was made for him. Disengaging his hand slowly, he watched her unhurriedly walk up the front steps.

"Thank you, Kenshin- and good night."

He loved the way she said his name. She looked back at him, and he could feel his desire for her swell.

"Happy birthday Kaoru."

And he meant it. Already his mind was reeling with an overload of information. Ticking off a list of things he needed to do still tonight, he watched her step into the house and heard the lock turn back into place. Stepping back farther, he watched the darkened windows. A light came on in the second story far window, and he saw the shadowed outline of a woman. It was Kaoru. She pulled open the blinds, and he drifted back deeper into the shadows. She stretched her arms over her head before leaning forward on the windowsill.

He watched her body stretch, his eyes glued to the blouse that was pulled tightly across her chest. Averting his eyes, he was struck with the feeling of guilt. Kaoru didn't deserve to be spied on like some sort of cheap whore.

Glancing quickly back up, Kenshin watched her back away from the window, her fingers undoing the buttons on her shirt as she turned. Anxious for one last glimpse of her, he waited patiently. The bright light in her window was replaced with a much smaller one, and Kauro's shadowy outline once more appeared in the window.

Wearing a fitted tank top and a pair of underwear, she watched the night sky as she brought a brush through her now unbound hair. Kenshin watched the scene, barely drawing breath between his slightly parted lips. She was beautiful- ethereal-perfect. And soon she would be his.

Kenshin jerked out of the memory, his mind suddenly aware of its surroundings. A door stood in front of him, slightly warped and faded with time. Crooked numbers spelt out 107.

Taking a steadying breath, he rested his head softly on the door. He had been waiting so long for this moment, and now he felt a sudden weight deep inside of him. What if she hated him? He wasn't sure he would be able to take that sort of rejection- Not from her. When she had left he'd been so certain that she hadn't wanted to. What if he was wrong though? Biting at the inside of his mouth, he took another deep breath. She was just on the other side of the door. He was closer to her than he had been for four years.

Angry at his sudden weakness, Kenshin pushed his doubts into the farthest recesses of his mind. Only one thing mattered now- He would have Kaoru by his side again. He wouldn't let anything else happen. She belonged to him. He just had to remind her. Feeling his internal drive harden, he leaned away from the door and knocked.

He listened intently as a shuffling in the room beyond became audible. The door swiftly pulled open.

"Mary you sure are-"

Her voice, still as clear and strong as he remembered cut off abruptly as the door swung open.

She stood in the open doorway, her barely braided hair providing a messy dark halo around her wide shocked face. Her eyes, still as blue as he remembered stared at him, shock and surprise written clearly in them. Kaoru's pretty mouth opened and closed as she watched him, and Kenshin could feel her eyes rove over his still form.

A blue apron wrapped around her body, the straps of a her top just visible beneath the cooking garment. The apron hid little of her form, and he took in the adjustments that time had brought to her face and body. Her looks had grown more refined with time, the porcelain skin still as clear and smooth as he remembered. The curves of her body had changed slightly as well, and he could see the increase in both the flare of her hips and the size of her chest. If possible she had grown even more enthralling. Bits of some sort of concoction stuck to both the apron and to her face. She had been cooking.

The soft scent of jasmine wafted towards him, and he let it sink into his bones. A soft sadness crossed her features suddenly, and Kenshin saw both love and pain in her eyes. Eyes that he could lose himself in.

She took a hesitant step back, and he prepared to catch the door if she tried to shut it on him. He knew just how stubborn she could be.

"Kaoru."

He spoke her name gently, possessiveness and want clear in his speech. She took a gasping breath her entire body heaving as he watched her suddenly struggle for breath. Her eyes glazed over, and he shot forward just as she fell back unconscious.

He hadn't been prepared for that.

Catching her before she hit the ground, he cradled her form protectively against his own. Her soft curves pressed against him, and he carefully stood with her still in his arms. She was just as light as he remembered, and her body felt frail in his arms. No matter what she wanted to do, she was still just a young woman.

Taking a step into her apartment, he glanced down at her. She was still out cold. He shut the door behind him, and stepped into the kitchen. A bowl full of batter rested on the counter, a box labeled Pancake Mix next to it. Moving deeper into her home, he took in the battered furniture, dim lights, chipped wallpaper, and scruffy carpet. Pictures obviously drawn by a child were haphazardly taped on the walls, and Kenshin felt a smile tug at his mouth.

Stepping into what was obviously her bedroom, he took in the small unmade bed and worn dresser. Letting himself inhale the strong scent of jasmine that was practically overwhelming, he used his free hand to pull back her blankets. Kenshin glanced down at her still closed eyes, and reluctantly laid her on the sheets. She felt so right in his arms.

He sat on the edge of her bed next to Kaoru, bringing a hand up to cup her cheek. She leaned into it, and Kenshin felt his heart jump slightly. Unconsciously she craved his touch. Did that mean that consciously she did as well?

"Kaoru."

His voice broke through the stillness, the sound stiff and full of pain. Lowering his head, he rested it against her forehead, his insides churning in turmoil. He didn't know if he wanted her to wake up and face him, or just stay asleep and be near him.

An odd reflective light caught his vision, and he searched for the source. His eyes fell on the cause, and they softened. It was the diamond he had given her so long ago. It rested against her body, glinting in the morning sunlight. He touched it and felt the warmth of her skin beneath it. She was wearing it. After all this time she not only still owned it, but was still wearing it. It moved him. It showed that she cared, that he was still on her mind. That despite her efforts, she had not been able to move on with her life.

The sound of a squeaky door jerked Kenshin from his thoughts, and his head turned toward the noise. Startlingly familiar red hair framed wide eyes that stared across the room from him in puzzlement. The eyes glanced down at the unconscious woman, before the figure abruptly darted across the room toward him.

"What did you do to Mommy!"

Kenshin felt his heart stop. The boy still clad in his pajamas was young, his face full of a child's anger. The young child glared at him, and Kenshin could immediately see the similarities between the boy and himself. It was his son. His son. Resisting the urge to pull the child into a hug, he instead brought his hand away from Kaoru's face. He didn't want to scare him.

His son.

"Your Mom was just a little tired."

Kenshin kneeled down carefully so he was level with the boy. He could see intelligence and understanding within the depths of his eyes. They were so likehis mother's, full of every emotin he was feeling. His son was already much more aware of the world than most boys his age. Putting his hand forward, he waited for his son to take it.

"My name is Kenshin, your Mom and I are old friends."

He watched Kenji eye him with a bit of mistrust, chewing on his lip as he thought about what to do. Kenshin waited, his heart uncertain and hopeful. Giving him one more look of concern, the boy's hand finally was brought up to shake with his. Inwardly, Kenshin sighed in relief.

"I'm Kenji."

The boy's voice was directed at Kenshin, but his eyes stared unblinkingly at Kaoru.

"It's nice to meet you Kenji."

Kenji moved closer to his Mom's still form, bringing a hand up to touch her own.

"Mom's been working really hard lately. She's been extra tired."

The boy's voice was solemn and serious. Kenshin examined his son again. He tried even at his young age to look after Kaoru.

Kenshin's son took a step away from his mother, grabbing his father's hand as he went.

"I think we should let Mommy rest. Come on."

Kenshin allowed Kenji to drag them back into the kitchen, the young boy pausing momentarily by the stove. His son eyed the batter resting next to it with a childlike longing in his gaze.

"Mommy was making pancakes."

Kenshin saw Kenji look at him out of the corner of his eye.

"Well, because your Mom is resting right now- I can cook you some pancakes if you want."

The kid's face filled with poorly hidden eagerness.

"If you want to you can."

Kenshin allowed his hand to rest gently on Kenji's head. The hair was soft to the touch. He couldn't help but smile at the notion of cooking breakfast for his family.

"I would love to."

Trying to familiarize himself with the kitchen, it took a relatively short amount of time to create a plate full of pancakes while answering question after question that Kenji posed.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm placing the batter onto the frying pan."

"What is that for?"

"This spatula allows you to flip a pancake over."

"What is that noise?"

"It's the sizzling sound the batter makes when cooking."

"What are you doing now?"

"I'm putting the pancake on a plate so it can cool down and we can eat it."

"What are you looking for?"

"I was wondering where your Mother kept the syrup."

"Do you like syrup?"

"Yes I do. Do you?"

"Yeah its really good and sticky. Can we have milk?"

"Of course we can."

"Why is your hair so long?"

That gave Kenshin a start.

"Huh? Oh, um- Because I like it a bit longer."

Kenshin set a plate with a prepared pancake in front of Kenji at the small kitchen table. Sitting down across from the young boy, he watched the child chew on a big piece of the sticky pancake- leaving a good amount of syrup on his cheek.

"Oh…But why?"

The young boy cocked his head to the side in confusion and Kenshin searched for an answer that would be acceptable to his son. What was Kenji's fascination with his hair?

"I like it long."

Kenshin spun around in his seat, a very embarrassed looking Kaoru resting against the door frame, her hand covering her mouth. The apron she had been wearing was discarded, her scantily clad body in plain sight. Kenshin let his eyes drink their fill. His desire for her hadn't diminished with time. He glanced back up at her face, catching a light flush cover her cheeks.

It seemed she was awake.

* * *

AN- Okay… so- Kenshin and Kaoru didn't really have the 'big shakedown' that I was thinking was going to happen in this chapter. I'm sorry- I hope no one tries to kill me….BUT- next chapter it is most definitely going to happen. Not that is much consolation for some of you…I know…Thank you all again for everything…And if you want, you should totally review… 


	6. Reading Between the Lines

NEW AN- Okay, a couple of reviewers mentioned a few mistakes- I went back and fixed some, (the ones I could find) plus added a sentence or so here or there- Nothing major- but just so you readers are aware. Thanks!

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Author's Note- Well, this chapter has a bit of everything (including the long awaited meeting). I realized that introducing the whole Aoshi/Misao relationship, then not touching on it for like a bizillion chapters- would not be a good thing. Although this story is most definitely Kenshin/Kaoru oriented, I do want to include other characters and their relationships involving one another. (As the story unfolds and as characters are introduced) Hopefully- you'll all enjoy that as well….grin.

PS- I know, the wait is killer. Why am I such a slow writer?

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Disclaimer- Not today, not tomorrow, not ever.

Rating- R/M- Read at your own risk….dun dun duuunnnnn.

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Things Left Unsaid

Chapter Six

Reading Between the Lines

* * *

Misao tucked a lock of stray hair behind her ear and shifted beneath the cool sheets of the hotel bed. Twirling the errant strand of hair between her fingers, she rolled her shoulder blades back and rubbed at her still sleep filled eyes. Twisting her mouth in what could be called an annoyed grimace, she rolled onto her side and fluffed the pillow beneath her head violently. Fearing that she may permanently damage the stuffing, Misao regretfully stopped her assault on the now slightly battered object. She was not a happy girl.

Last night was supposed to have been a night full of Aoshi! Her hands gripped the sheets painfully and she rolled across the bed fitfully. It was supposed to have been perfect! Instead, the night had gone dismally down hill from the beginning. Glancing at the light that was just starting to show between the gaps in the drapes, she grabbed at the clock next to the bed.

It was just after seven. She groaned.

The night had started out so perfectly. Sarah had said she would stay late for her at the restaurant, she had made a bundle in tips, and Aoshi had been on time and looking hot enough to eat with a spoon. She had even been able to introduce Kia to him, something she'd been trying to do for weeks! Her and Aoshi were going to stay in a fancy hotel, make love until she passed out, and spend the entire next day wrapped up in each other! It had all been going flawlessly too, until she had jumped in the shower.

She couldn't help it that she didn't want to have sex smelling of food, liquor, cigarette smoke, and all other aspects of a restaurant. Of course, he hadn't _really_ seemed to mind. Misao shivered at the sudden heat that ran through her. Yeah right, she had thought for a moment last night that his control had completely snapped. That had only happened on a few occasions, and Misao could remember just how sore she had been the mornings…errr afternoons after he had cracked. Those nights also contained some of her most pleasant and mind blowing memories. She edged the sheet lower in a sudden attempt to cool off.

He had been so intensely set on her, so out of control the moment they had stepped into the hotel room. His passionate nature that was hidden from the world was one of the things that she found most attractive about him. He was so different from her in so many ways, but at the same time could be just as- if not more passionate than she could be. And it was amazing and breath taking to be the center of his focus. To have all of his attention honed in on her.

She had noticed the trait in him the first time they had met. His steely gaze that spoke volumes while he spoke nothing. He had been tall, dark, handsome, and mysterious. And luckily for her, interested. That she still didn't understand at times. He was so amazing and had such depth within him- how could he possibly want someone as energetic, annoying, and painfully average as her? She knew what she looked like. As one of the boys in her college calculus class had said, skinny and childish looking with an air of immaturity. Misao still had nightmares in which Aoshi would look at her and suddenly realize how much better he could have done. They were not pleasant.

Misao rolled over again, trying to turn away from her suddenly unpleasant thoughts. The thoughts however followed her and she growled at her inability to rid herself of them. Pushing herself up onto her elbows, she blew her bangs haphazardly out of her face. There wasn't any way she would be able to get back to sleep now.

She crawled out of bed, cursing the cool air that hit her exposed skin. Repressing a shiver, she recalled last with a frown on her face. Aoshi had given her very little information when he had left. Stating simply that an emergency at work had come up, and that he needed to take care of it immediately. She hadn't argued with him, knowing that his work was important and often involved odd hours. This wasn't the first time their evening alone together had been ruined by an unexpected problem at his work.

Misao stood and scrunched the long carpet beneath her toes. Soft carpet on her bare feet was one of her favorite simple pleasures. Yawning away the last bit of sleepiness she stepped into the bathroom. She poured herself a tall glass of water from the tap, and sipped at it delicately while at the same time examining her appearance. The cool water felt wonderful on her throat, and she rested the chilled cup against her neck. Misao had hoped that he would have been back by now. If she had known he wouldn't, she wouldn't have bothered to sleep in the black teddy she had splurged on last week. She had tried on over twenty different pieces before deciding on this particular one. Misao supposed now that it would have been just as effective to wear her paper bag grandma pajamas, since Aoshi hadn't seen her in them.

Turning slightly in the mirror to examine her figure, she furrowed her eyebrows. Although her body wasn't as 'developed' compared to many others, the skimpy lingerie did enhance what she had. And she knew that Aoshi enjoyed black quite a bit.

Stupid Aoshi and his stupid job.

Even she would admit that having a long distance relationship wasn't easy. Misao was only able to see Aoshi once every two or so weeks. It had been fine when they were still getting to know each other and the dating had been casual- but now it created a mess of problems. She wanted to see him, wanted to just be with him in everyday situations. And of course she wanted to wake up to his face every morning. That was a new thought for her.

Misao had never been involved so much in a relationship, never had been so invested in one. Aoshi had been the first one she had ever been physical with. Her hormones were in overdrive because of him. It had been the first relationship in which she had thought the words, I love you. Misao hadn't said those words out loud yet, but even thinking them was a huge step on her side of their relationship.

She didn't want it to end just because of the distance.

But she couldn't continue in the relationship the way it was. Every time she had to say goodbye, it tore her heart more and more. Shutting her eyes against her reflection, she took a deep cleansing breath. If only she knew how to tell Aoshi what she was feeling. Misao wasn't sure what to do- what step to take. The thought of moving terrified her, the thought of staying and him leaving alarmed her more.

And worst- she worried that for him, this wasn't serious. That if she told him how much he meant to her, he would calmly tell her that she was overreacting. Misao was just a casual relationship while he was in Chicago. That she was nothing more than a fuck buddy.

Her stomach dropped.

Feeling a sudden stiffness in her back, she set down the glass and allowed herself a half back bend. She pushed the heavy thoughts to the back corner of her mind. Hearing a satisfying crack, she sighed in content. Allowing her body to stay in the slightly contorted pose, she eyed the now upside down wall behind her with concentration. Thinking about the future right now was not a good idea. Misao prided herself on the fact she lived in the present, and didn't become lost in the unchangeable past and the possibility filled future.

She would wait until the hotel check-out time for him, hopefully he would come back and they would be able to spend some of the day together. Otherwise….Misao shook her head…right, she wasn't going to think about the future.

Shutting her eyes, she pulled herself out of the backward pose and leaned forward toward her toes. Letting her hair hang unbound, Misao rested her forearms against the cool tile of the floor. She hadn't stretched this well in a long while. Feeling the muscles in the back of her legs loosen, Misao groaned aloud at the wonderful sensation.

She jerked reflexively as a cool hand rested itself against her barely clad backside. Alarmed, Misao attempted to straighten herself. Who had the gall to come into a stranger's hotel room and feel them up? The body connected to the hand moved closer until she could feel the person's body directly behind her, squeezed close due to the small confines of the room.

Feeling them lean forward over her, she tensed at the feeling of him molding his body to her own.

"Misao."

His hot breath ghosted along the shell of her ear, and her heart beat began to slow as she recognized the voice. Relaxing against him, Misao bit her lip to keep from crying out as one hand traveled up to touch her breasts and the other gripped her hip, pulling her up.

Opening her eyes, Misao watched in the mirror as Aoshi smoothed her hair away from her neck. He tugged gently on it, and Misao felt her head fall to the side. Letting her eyes drink in all that she could see of his reflection, she took in the outside coat and wind tousled hair. She glanced at his face, and had her eyes caught in his intense gaze. A slow smirk spread across his face as he lowered his head to nip and lick at her neck.

His breath and tongue set Misao's body on fire, and she writhed against his strong form. From the time they had first started dating, Misao had realized that Aoshi had a fondness for her neck and shoulders. Often times after he visited, she would need to break out her turtle necks for a few days until the telltale signs of his obsession faded. It looked like she would have to again.

Feeling his teeth scrape against her shoulder, she jumped beneath his ministrations. His tongue quickly followed, and her eyes slid shut at the sensation.

"A…Aoshi…"

Her voice came out breathy and low, and the grip around her waist tightened. She let her lower body move against his, her instincts taking control of her actions. He reciprocated by nipping up along her neck and holding her hips still. The breath along her neck accelerated.

"Misao."

The words ran through her body, and Misao was suddenly turned completely around. She loved the way he said her name. Not bothering to wait, she immediately went up onto her tip toes to kiss him.

She prayed that for Aoshi, this was more than just sex.

Shutting her eyes, she let Aoshi pull her from the room and half drag half carry her to the bed. Feeling it behind her knees, Misao allowed herself to fall back- trusting that Aoshi wouldn't let her harm herself. She hit the comforter softly, his hands cradling her slack form. Waiting to feel his mouth on hers, she opened her eyes when instead his hand rested against her cheek. He stared down at her, and she could sense a blush forming. His forehead followed after it, and he touched their foreheads together.

Seeing something unidentifiable in his eyes, she curved her arms around his neck and idly played with his hair. Something was definitely going on with him.

"You will not leave me."

The words were spoken plainly, and were in direct contrast to his hands which had started to do wicked things to her body. Struggling to hold onto her conscious train of thought, she quickly let go of it as his hands started removing her clothing. Her head jerked from side to side as his mouth trailed over her skin.

"You will not do to me what she did to him."

She wasn't sure what he was talking about, and gathering every ounce of self control she had, she forced his head up toward her own.

"Aoshi, I need you."

She kissed him again, and found herself once more lost in his caresses. Misao wasn't sure what was bothering him, but at the moment she just wanted to be with him. His hands tightened on her almost painfully, but she didn't mind.

She had no idea what the future would bring, but Misao was determined not to worry about the future. To hell with the future. She wanted to stay in the present, with Aoshi. Where they were together and there were no problems with the distance, moving, his job, her school, and there wasn't a serious talk that was long overdue.

She wanted this moment to never end.

* * *

Kaoru sat at the small dingy table, sure on some level that she must have entered the Twilight Zone. Kenji sat next to her, his legs swinging back and forth as he munched happily at his plate of pancakes- oblivious to the heavy tension that was thick in the air as he continuously chattered. He spoke to no one in particular, the small child seemingly addressing the pancakes in front of him with his comments on just how sticky and yummy they were. She could hear the television playing Kenji's favorite cartoon in the other room, the loud noise filtering through the thin walls. Kaoru stared at the pancakes in front of her, trying her best to make the syrup soaked breakfast food more interesting then the man sitting at her other side. She clutched a fork in her hand, the metal digging painfully into her flesh from the death like grip she had on it.

When she had opened the door less than an hour ago, Kaoru would never have guessed in a million years that Kenshin would be on the other side. Not if she could have guessed a hundred times. Looking at the pancakes more resolutely, she consciously kept her breathing steady. How? How had he done it. She had been so careful. Four years! For four years she had evaded him. How had she slipped up? She shut her eyes at the absurdity of her situation. She was sitting and eating breakfast in a civilized manner with the same person she had ran desperately from just four years ago. Kaoru resisted the urge to slam her head down painfully. She didn't want to upset Kenji.

Glancing over at her still oblivious son, she wondered if Kenshin knew that he was his son. Kaoru resisted the urge to roll her eyes at herself- Even a blind man could see the similarities between Kenshin and Kenji. When she had walked into the kitchen after waking up and seen them huddled close together, conversing with one another- she was struck with the sudden urge to cry. They looked so cute together, so much like a family. The real question was- What would Kenshin do now? He had found her, and now also knew that she was raising their son. That was what was scaring her most. Did he still want her? Did he want the son they had created together? Or did he hate her. Her breathing hitched as the thought struck her. What if he wanted Kenji? What if he tried to take him from her? She couldn't fight him, he was too powerful. And then she would be alone, and -

NO!

Kaoru shook her head, displacing the thoughts. Even if Kenshin had never forgiven her, he would never cut Kenji out of her life. Kenshin was a good person. She was the wicked one that had left. She was the one that deserved no pity. His anger- she could handle that. Kaoru wanted him to yell, to demand the truth out of her. To hate her with all that he was. Then it would be so much easier for her to get angry as well. To hate him as he hated her. Instead, he quietly ate pancakes next to her, as if there were no unresolved issues between them.

For some reason, she felt like crying.

Her grip on the fork tightened as she noticed Kenshin's unhurried movements beside her. She shivered at his proximity, the closeness was almost more than she could bear. Kaoru knew that if she took a breath in through her nose, the familiar sent of ginger would greet her. The scent was both comforting and unsettling. Shifting the sleeves on the long t-shirt she had thrown on after awakening, she bit at her lip in an effort to keep her slowly bubbling emotions in check.

"Kaoru, if you don't eat soon your pancakes will get cold."

She went still at his words, her body responding to the way his mouth said her name. Somehow, it seemed like so much more when he said it. The years felt stripped away with him next to her, and no longer was she the poor single mother named 'Kia,' but rather the young woman she had once been with her entire life ahead of her. Unable to help herself, she felt her gaze slowly slide up his body to his eyes. Violet rimmed with gold, he stared back into her eyes with an intensity that had the hair on the back of her neck standing up. She looked away quickly, feeling a blush spreading over her cheeks. Kaoru didn't know what to make out of his look.

Nodding numbly at his comment, she unclenched the fork in her hand enough to cut through the round edible objects. Stuffing the warm doughy pieces into her mouth, she chewed automatically, barely noticing just how delicious they were. It didn't surprise her how good they tasted. Kenshin was a fabulous cook.

She ate mechanically, each pancake disappearing in a slow and steady fashion. Kaoru stared continually at her plate, afraid and unwilling to let her eyes shift their gaze to the table's other occupants. Her head felt as if it were stuffed with cotton. She didn't want to finish this meal- knowing that as long as it continued, so would the calm before the storm.

A sharp knocking jilted her out of her daze, and she looked around in unexpected confusion. She felt Kenshin next to her tense. Hearing the noise again, she realized that it was someone at the door. Pushing her chair back noisily, she glanced quickly at Kenji. He was up to his elbows in syrup. Not having the energy to smile, she allowed a slight upturning of the mouth before walking to the door. Cracking it open, she glanced outside into the hallway.

"Good morning!"

Mary stood on the other side of the door, her face bright and awake for the time of day. The appearance of her baby sitter seemed to bring a harsh realness to the previously surreal situation.

"Good morning Mary."

Kaoru forced a smile, and allowed the door to open a few more inches. Mary chewed loudly on a piece of bubblegum, her entire jaw working open and shut as she fiddled with her shirt. Kaoru wasn't sure what possessed her to chew gum so early in the day, but her teeth were hurting just looking at Mary do it.

"Oh, I'm sorry- I didn't know you had company."

Mary's voice had grown suddenly much more formal, and her hands stopped their fidgeting. A light blush covered her cheeks.

"Huh?"

Kaoru followed Mary's gaze, and found Kenshin standing only a few inches behind her. He leaned on the doorframe, the heat caused by the nearness of his body sending a shiver through her. Kenji stood half hidden behind his knees. Kaoru's mouth opened then shut as she thought of some way to introduce him. After all, if she didn't- who knew what Mary would think then. After all, it was before noon and she wasn't exactly dressed for company. And Kenshin was standing awfully close. But how to introduce him? It wouldn't be proper to say, 'This is Kenji's father, that I ran away from and have been hiding from for just over four years- Oh, and I didn't tell him that I was pregnant when I left.' She didn't think that would go so well. His hand suddenly snaked its way around her waist, while the other one reached out for Mary's hand.

"Hi, I'm Kenshin. I'm just an old friend of _Kia's_ that's visiting."

Mary's blush deepened, and Kaoru noticed the way she eyed Kenshin's hand around her waist. OLD FRIEND? He sure as hell wasn't presenting himself as an 'old friend.' And she couldn't help but cringe at the way he said her supposed name. How could Mary not notice the way he stressed it? He might as well have said, 'I'll call her Kia for now- but it's not her real name! And she knows it, and I know it- and you should really be able to figure it out. Kia? I don't think so.'

"I'm Mary, I live down the hall. I watch Kenji five or six days a week. He is such a sweetie pie."

Kenshin's eyebrows lifted slightly at her last comments. Kaoru let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding. Thank goodness that Mary didn't pick up on Kenshin's obvious sarcasm involving her name. Kaoru watched him from the corner of her eye as he inspected the girl in front of them more closely. A soft smile lit up his features.

"Thank you so much for watching him. That's quite a responsibility."

If possible, the blush on Mary's face grew. She eyed Kenshin's hair, and Kaoru noticed the way her eyes flickered to Kenji. The babysitter's lips pursed in thought as her eyes went back and forth between the two of them again. Crap. Even Mary wasn't that dim. It was obvious that Kenshin was Kenji's father.

"Old friends you say?"

Mary's voice stayed respectful, but Kaoru could hear the barely concealed curiosity. Like a spy she was trying to drop under their radar and pick up clues on Kenshin and Kaoru's relationship. Kaoru's mouth opened to tell Mary that now was not a good time, when out of the blue Kenshin spoke.

"You know Mary, _Kia_ and I really have some catching up to do. I don't suppose you'd be able to watch Kenji for the next couple of hours? I would gladly double your usual pay for such short notice."

The girl melted under the attention of the older man, and immediately she started nodding- punctuating the movement with a loud snap of her gum. Her hands returned to fiddle with the ends of her shirt. Kaoru clamped down the sudden jealousy that wormed its way inside of her and resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Mary, the silly girl that she was, was practically melting into the floor under his gaze! What was that about? She was jealous of Kenshin showering Mary with attention? What was wrong with her? Mary was sixteen for goodness sake!

"Is that okay with you Kenji?"

Kenshin knelt down next to the young boy, and placed a hand on his shoulder. Kenji was busy chewing on the sleeve of his pajama. Kaoru watched Kenji look from her to Kenshin -then back again.

"Okay, but can we have pizza for lunch?"

Standing back up Kenshin nodded his head, the young boy already going with Mary. Fixed in a stupor, Kaoru listened as the two of them walked down the hall and chatted about how yummy pancakes were. Kenshin closed the door, leaving just the two of them in the apartment. The air felt thicker than concrete.

How the hell had that happened?

Kaoru stood still, unable and unwilling to turn herself away from the door. Kenshin still stood behind her, his hand still lightly resting on her hip. Her breath felt heavy in her own ears, and she felt her chest rise and fall with the strain of air moving through her lungs. She couldn't do this. His hand moved over her shoulder and set itself on the now closed door. Feeling the closeness of his proximity grow, she couldn't help but uncontrollably shake. She had to get out of this situation.

She spun away from him, ducking under his outstretched arm. Flying across the room, thinking only of escape, she couldn't help the words that spilled from her mouth.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no….."

The words were soft and practically breathless as she darted through the kitchen. She could hear Kenshin's footsteps follow her through the room.

"Kaoru."

His voice was calm, but loud enough that she could hear it over her mantra. Kenshin's hand suddenly encased her arm, and he spun her around to face him. His eyes shown amber with only a touch of violet. He may be acting calm, but he was not happy. She twisted her arm desperately trying to release herself, but his grip never wavered. It seemed that today was not her lucky day.

"We need to talk."

His voice was low.

"There is nothing I have to say!"

Kaoru fought to keep her composure. She didn't want to have this conversation. She wasn't prepared to have this conversation. The grip on her arm tightened at her words, and she found herself half set half thrown onto the dingy couch. He stood next to the couch, his tall imposing figure hovering over her.

"Nothing to say to me?" Kaoru could feel the emotion under the surface straining to break free, "Nothing? Well, I find that very hard to believe."

She looked at a spot on the floor, hoping that if she concentrated hard enough she would sink into it. His hand came close to her face and she stiffened as it brushed away a stray hair. His fingers were warm and gently on her cheek. Kaoru knew her resolve was already crumbling. It moved lower, and she felt the hand rest against the stone around her neck.

Damn. Why did he have to notice the necklace?

"Please, leave."

Kaoru clung to her stubbornness.

"No. I wont. It took me four years to find you, and I'm not leaving."

Her mouth opened, but any response she had was cut off.

"How?" His voice sounded calm, but the words cut deeply into her. "How could you leave me? How could you have my child and never tell me? How Kaoru? Do you hate me that much? Did you really wish to destroy me?"

She pressed her back into the couch behind her, and felt tears start to gather in the backs of her eyes. How could she possibly explain what had happened four years ago? There wasn't any way. Did he think that this was easy for her? Did he think these last four years had been a dream vacation?

Biting her lip, she said nothing.

"Kaoru, don't hide this from me- I am going to get to the bottom of this."

He sat next to her, his hand resting on her knee as a reminder of his presence. And she was sure it would also hold her down if she attempted to bolt again. It felt good against her leg, and she cursed herself for her weakness. Kenshin leaned forward, his face getting disturbingly close to her own. Her breath quickened even as she felt her palms grow sweaty. It had been so long and her body still reacted to his. He was still as gorgeous as she remembered, still as stubborn as she remembered. And she thought that he maybe even still cared.

His hand moved to her shoulder and she felt herself lean into his touch for a second before pulling herself away. Damn her traitorous body!

He chuckled softly.

"Kaoru, I know that you still care."

To punctuate his point the hand on her shoulder rubbed soothingly. She couldn't suppress the low moan. Her blood burst into fire, and she caught a slow smirk on his face. Feeling a hot blush on her cheeks, she jerked away from his grasp. Part of her wished he would just kiss her. His hand followed, resuming its non-predatory role on her leg. She shook her head back and forth, attempting to dissuade his claim that she cared. This was not going as she planned. Then again, she still hadn't been able to form a plan.

"Don't lie Kaoru, you know that I can tell when you're being untruthful."

The little playfulness that had been in his voice was now completely gone.

"I am not playing a game anymore, Kaoru. You will tell me what happened."

She shook her head, feeling her tears finally start to gather.

"Kaoru, I need to know why today is the first time I've met my son. Why I wasn't there with you when you delivered. Why I wasn't even told that I was going to be a father. My _son_ Kaoru."

Kaoru felt her body twitch. She was a horrible person. How could she ever expect him to understand when she had done what she did? How could she explain?

"Kenshin," she felt her body tremble as she tried to keep her voice steady. "You don't understand. I didn't want… I never ever… you don't even know…"

She couldn't get anything else out. Glaring down at her wringing hands, she felt her teeth bite into her lip painfully. This was stupid! He was stupid! Why, did he have to find her? Kaoru had hidden herself for four years, four years! She had been beginning to think that he would never find her! Feeling her mood shift to anger, she welcomed the protective emotion that spurred forth.

Wrenching his hand off of her leg, she jumped to her feet and turned toward him.

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ANYTHING?"

Kaoru wasn't sure if she was crying or yelling.

"EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER DONE I DID FOR YOU! EVERYTHING!"

Her hand covered her mouth attempting to muffle the loud gasps for air that seemed to be unstoppable. Her chest rose and fell unsteadily, and she felt the blood rush to her head. She had not just said that! Kenshin's eyebrows rose as his face took on a look of unbridled curiosity.

Dammit! That was just what she needed!

Turning on her heel, Kaoru ran to the only place she could think of for escape. Her room. Maybe she was acting juvenile, maybe even younger than that- but she didn't care. She just had to get away from him and his penetrating gaze. Lurching through the doorway, she heard his heavy footfalls behind her. Grasping the old metal door knob, she pushed the rickety piece of plywood shut as fast as she could. She knew that she was being irrational. Kaoru wasn't fast enough. Kenshin's hand snaked through the gap between the door and the door frame and held it fast. His eyes, sharp pieces of amber emerged from behind the door, and she fell back in trepidation.

"Kaoru…"

His voice was low and dangerous. He had gotten something out of her, and now he wanted more. Why did she have to let that out? How could she be such an idiot? She crawled backwards, scuttling on her elbows and heels. He entered the room fully closing the door behind him, and silently moved across the floor.

"I know this isn't easy for you to accept Kaoru. But I will never allow you to leave my side again."

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AN-Yeah! Another chapter finished! FINALLY! I'm sure that is what you are all thinking. Oh, and about any grammatical errors- I just tried to get the chapter out as soon as possible- forgive me. NEXT CHAP- Kaoru lets the cat out of the bag! Why did she leave Kenshin? What is going on?

OH- BTW- You should review! It only takes a second! I'm just saying!


	7. Conversations

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Author's Note- Thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews- Thank you especially to the reviewer that pointed out the whole 'Kaoru' 'Kia' thing. I really appreciate it and was able to fix it. Sometimes my brain is not attached to my fingers- so thanks again. Also, I have been debating what exactly should happen in this story from here on out- cause I could probably wrap it up in a couple of chapters- but I think instead I want to go this other direction which will be lots longer. So, that means there will be more story, but it will take more time. Sorry. 

On a side note- Guilty Pleasures has added this story to their archives. I really like this website, as in it is freak'n sweet, and just wanted to plug it. So… go… visit… read… enjoy it.

PS- Can you believe I actually started writing this chapter two days after posting chapter 6?- I really have entered the Twilight Zone… of course then my computer had to be fixed… so I couldn't touch it for over two weeks… Dang you 'A' key! Why did you have to fall off? And then I had to pack and get ready for the new school year, and then I had to move up and start classes! I'm talking Japanese…sweet! And of course I finished work as well, and then started another job. Why again do I need money?

PSS A reviewer last time made the comment that they could tell the last chapter was a bit more rushed. Because I don't want any of my chapters real sloppy, I really focused on getting this one right- hopefully you all enjoy it!

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Disclaimer- Long story short- not today, not tomorrow, not ever. 

Rating- R/M- Be as crazy as you wanna be.

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Things Left Unsaid 

Chapter Seven

Conversations

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Kaoru eyed Kenshin's approaching frame, and pushed herself backwards as quickly as she could. She tried not to think about the words he had just spoken. He wouldn't let her leave his side again? The line played itself again and again in her mind even as she did her best to push it out of her thoughts. How could he possibly still love her? She had left him, had his child without him knowing, avoided him as if he was the devil himself. If given the opportunity, she would dart out of this room and attempt to escape him again. And he still wanted her by his side? It couldn't be true. No one was that much of a saint. No one. 

Kaoru's heart hammered loudly in her chest, and she both hoped and feared that he was telling the truth. She did want to get away, didn't she? Of course she did! Kaoru was not just going to fold now- not after all she had been through, right? Her muddled thoughts pushed and pulled on one another, and Kaoru didn't even try to make sense of them. Seeing him again had brought down the wall of emotions she had painstakingly built up. She couldn't deny that she still cared for him, possibly even loved him. Hell, who was she kidding? Kaoru couldn't stop herself from loving him. Catching the rug on her hand, she stumbled on the floor while still attempting to keep up the space between the two of them.

Resisting the urge to let out her frustration in a healthy but loud scream, Kaoru bit her lip painfully in an effort to bring her emotions back under control.

She eyed his approaching frame, Kenshin's posture predatory and the glean in his eyes intense. He was getting noticeably closer. An unnerving tremble went through her body and her fingernails gripped the floorboards hard enough to leave indentations. His intentions were obvious in his gaze. He wanted the truth out of her, and wanted it now. And then he wanted her. Kaoru knew that he was accustomed and skilled at getting what he wanted.

Who was she kidding? This was Kenshin! She had been lucky, amazingly lucky to get away the first time. It had practically been a miracle. No doubt this time he would use every tactic he could to keep her by his side. And that included using her own body against her. And knowing how much she loved his touch, Kaoru could see just how far out of control this situation was becoming. She was aware that if he wasn't able to get the answers another way, Kenshin would have no qualms about seducing them out of her.

She wasn't sure if the thought made her uneasy, angry, or excited. Hitting the far wall, she 'eeped' aloud and glanced around the room. It was slightly blurry from the tears threatening to spill from her eyes. How had she made it so far across the floor? Wasn't the room a bit bigger than this? Her hands reflexively clenched at the ground beneath her, and she winced as the sharp wood bit into her fingers. She was giving herself splinters.

Swiveling her head back towards her silent stalker, Kaoru let out a half yell at how close he had gotten. His gaze narrowed, and flickered briefly over her form. She saw his eyes pause on her outstretched legs. Why again had she bothered to put on a long sleeve shirt if she wasn't going to put on any pants? At that moment, she hadn't really wanted to wear a pair of shorts that were dirty… and today was laundry day so they all just happened to be dirty. Crap. Yeah right, even she could figure out that she was lying to herself.

She supposed on some level she had remembered just how much Kenshin loved her long legs… and she hadn't been able to resist the urge to taunt him with them- to see what sort of reaction she could get out of him. While setting the table she had caught him out of the corner of her eye watching her, his eyes following the long lines of her legs up to the bottom of the t-shirt that barely covered her underwear. Damn, she could be so stupid!

A slight noise shook her out of her thoughts, and she looked over at Kenshin. Yes, she was exactly where he wanted her to be. Pressing herself into the wall, she felt the peeling paint at her back even as she tried to disappear into the wall. It didn't work. Her hair loosened itself from her braid, and she felt wisps of it fall onto her face and neck. She worked her lower lip between her teeth and froze when the darkness from his shadow fell over her. She was so screwed.

"Now Kaoru, you are going to have to stay still if we want to finish this conversation."

His voice was deceptively calm, and she fought a shiver as it rolled over her. Looking at him from beneath her bangs, she watched him lower himself into a kneeling position close to her. This was it for her. There wasn't anywhere for her to go. And she couldn't just run out of there and start somewhere new. She had a child now… and he knew about it. Even if she was able to get away, Kaoru would never want to deprive Kenji of his father. Right? Not when fate had brought them all back together… right? Her emotions had knotted themselves together and she wasn't sure she'd ever be able to untangle them. She couldn't even figure out what she wanted. For Kenshin to stand up and leave, or pull her close and kiss her.

Kaoru jumped as one of his hands set itself on her leg. The other came forward and rested itself next to her head. Her body hummed with his closeness, and she took deep breaths through her open mouth. Eyes wide, her mind raced as she tried to piece together some sort of defense.

The hand by her head stroked her cheek gently, and Kaoru looked deeply into the eyes of the man in front of her. She could see determination in them, a need to discover the truth. Pushing away the want to fold, to curl up into his arms and spill her heart, she grit her teeth painfully and turned her head to the side away from his hand.

"Just go away."

Her voice was soft and barely audible to her own ears. She heard the deep slow breaths of Kenshin as his hand returned to the wall behind her.

"Kaoru." his voice was clear and only slightly tinged with exasperation, "Nothing will make me leave you now that I've found you. Nothing. You need to accept that."

Keeping her head turned to the side, Kaoru examined the floorboards. His hand lightly stroked her leg, and her skin trembled and burned at his touch. Her body wanted more. Suppressing the urge to grab and kiss him, she tried to disregard him and his soft touch. She focused on trying to stay mad. That's right…. Kaoru was angry.

He had always been like this. Relentless in everything that he did. Completely unsatisfied unless everything went his way. Kenshin had wanted her, and he had gotten her. The fact that he had not been able to keep her, Kaoru was sure that must have bothered him. But it had been more than that. At least Kaoru hoped so. She hoped that he had fallen in love with her as desperately as she had with him. He had said it right? He wouldn't lie about something that important. No, not her Kenshin. Wait…her mind was wandering again… she was supposed to be angry. Very angry.

"I don't have to accept anything Kenshin!"

His eyes were hot and piercing.

"Do you truly want me to leave?"

Kenshin's voice was level and the hand stroking her leg stilled. The words reverberated in her head, and Kaoru struggled to tell him just that. She would tell him to go away, and he would see just how much she meant it. Her mouth opened, a gasping noise barely audible. Her vocal chords seemed to be in disagreement with her. Kaoru tried to speak again, to tell him that yes, she wanted him the hell out of her apartment- but again no such noise came forth.

The hand on her leg traveled farther up, beginning again its light strokes. She consciously suppressed a moan. His other hand grasped her chin, forcing the less than willing Kaoru to look at him. Feeling her eyes drawn to his, she watched the molten amber and dark violet twist and turn in his eyes. He was so enthralling… so captivating even after all this time. The pressure of his hand on her leg increased, and Kaoru felt her heart beat grow erratic. The sensation stirred up emotions within her that she hadn't felt in years, and her eyes slid shut.

Her thoughts raged out of her control.

_Love your touch, love you_.

Noting his sudden stillness, Kaoru pulled herself out of the mind haze she had trapped herself in and opened her eyes drowsily. Attempting to figure out why he had stopped his ministrations… and why she cared so much that he had stopped- she let her heavily lidded eyes find his.

He was watching her, his sight wandering over her entire frame. A look of victory and want covered his face, and Kaoru couldn't help but notice how soft his hair looked brushing against his forehead… how much she wanted to run her fingers through it. _Just a quick touch, its so beautiful. _She felt a blush spread over her cheeks. What had come over him so quickly?

"I heard that."

His words crawled over her skin and she felt her blood grow slow in her veins. Shit. She was under the distinct impression that some of her inner monologue was not so inner. Something inside of her that had been slowly bending broke. Had he heard her say that she loved him? She could feel her blush crawling down her face. What had she said out loud? Why, why, why was she such an idiot!

"You had a passion for my hair back then too, Kaoru." The grin on his face grew wicked, "But to be honest I didn't realize how much you enjoyed my touch. I might have to use that information against you… I'm sure you understand."

Her breathing hitched. Yep, he had heard about the hair… and seeing that he had remarked on his touch… Kenshin had also heard her proclaim her love for him…Dammit. How exactly was she going to get him to go away again? She was sure her plan did not involve stating how much she still cared for him.

Seeming to gain his composure back, his hand once again resumed its movement on her body. To her chagrin however, his other hand took up residence on her other side, resting where her hip met her leg. Despite her attempt to hold onto her self control, beneath his ministrations she lost herself once more. Kaoru heard her breath grow quicker and harsher, her uneven breaths loud in the suddenly quiet room. She knew that she needed to be angry, knew that her leaning up against a wall and gasping for breath while his hands did delicious things to her body was not a good idea.

Kaoru just couldn't get her mind and her body to coordinate with one another. And as each moment passed, she felt her mind drift further and further into the pleasure Kenshin was causing.

His hand pressed into a particularly sensitive spot on her abdomen and her soft breathy moan turned into a sharp cry of pleasure. Her head snapped back even as her hips instinctively moved up, and she didn't stop her keens of pleasure as his head bent toward her neck and she felt soft kisses and nips there. Kaoru's back arched up into his caresses, her form beginning to thrash beneath his attentions. How long had it been since she had felt this way? She didn't even have to guess, it had been the last time she'd been with Kenshin. Through the past few years even the thought of another man touching her besides Kenshin seemed ridiculous.

God their lips hadn't even met yet and she was complete putty in his hands.

"Kaoru."

His voice ghosted along the shell of her ear, and her hands fisted themselves in the back of his shirt. If she let go of him she was sure that she would die.

"Tell me why you left."

The words floated down through her haze and she attempted to make sense of his words.

"What?"

She could barely get the word out of her mouth before it turned into a groan.

"Tell me why you left me four years ago."

One of his hands slipped beneath her shirt and Kaoru tried to get a hold of herself. Her head jerked from side to side, and she felt her now messy hair brush against her cheeks and neck. She knew that this situation was completely out of her control. Opening her mouth she struggled to say something.

"Ken…shin…"

Her voice sounded desperate and craving in her ears.

"Its okay Kaoru, I'm right here."

She lost herself in his voice, and the ruthlessness of his questioning registered only in a far off corner of her mind.

"Tell me Kaoru."

"I…I left…" the throat didn't seem capable of forming the words, "I left because…" her sentence was interrupted with a breathy moan. Kenshin had turned his attentions to her collar bone.

"Yes?"

He spoke against her skin.

"Because of…" Kaoru's brain attempted to put the words together. Why had she left Kenshin again? Oh yeah, now she remembered, "The scar."

She felt him still briefly before his actions continued. If anything they were more urgent than before. Kaoru became very aware that she hadn't put a bra on. A heaviness weighed her down, and the small circles he made along her inner thigh were making her see stars. His fingers edged a little higher, and she could feel her blood boil with anticipation.

"Go on."

"That is… I know its not your…" she paused to catch her breath, "…f- fault, but if I had stayed you would…would have," Kaoru swallowed, "d-d-destr-…y …and oh…and I couldn't let you do that to yourself."

"More Kaoru."

Watching the ceiling through fluttering eyelids she tried to construe more sentences in her mind. Her hands clenched at his shirt, and she distantly realized she was attempting to pull it off him. A ringing filled her ears and Kaoru felt herself slowly spiral back to earth at the noise. Her breathing was loud in her ears. It sounded again, and she stiffened slightly. What was that noise?

"Fuck."

Kenshin's voice was soft and she could hear the underlying anger. His hands on her body stopped their ministrations. She couldn't help the slight plea that escaped her parted lips. Why did he stop?

She wanted him so badly. Didn't he realize that?

Kaoru jumped at the loud ring and tried to come back to her senses.

Banishing the lethargic feeling in her body, Kaoru felt her entire body grow tense. What the hell had just happened? Was she completely screwed? Kaoru felt the list of reasons why she most definitely was accumulating in her mind. 1. She was against her bedroom wall thoroughly mussed up. 2. Kenshin had been doing incredibly wicked things to her body, and she had liked it. _And_ he knew that she had liked it. 3. She had let it slip that she still had feelings for him. 4. Kaoru had just given him information about what happened four years ago. Yep, she was most assuredly over her head.

The ringing sounded again, and Kaoru completely came to awareness. Pushing on Kenshin's shoulders, she scrambled past him and into the kitchen- attempting to straighten her horribly skewed shirt in the process. Picking up the ringing phone, Kaoru hit the 'Talk' button and put it to her ear. She pointedly ignored Kenshin.

"Hello?"

She disregarded how breathy and soft her voice sounded.

"Kia is that you? This is Melinda."

The voice on the other end was like a bucket of ice water. That's right, she was Kia…not Kaoru here. She hadn't been Kaoru in four years. She wasn't some teenage girl anymore that was new to the world and its trials. Melinda, the woman on the phone, had made that abundantly clear to her. A fellow server at the Blue Spot, she was a nice enough girl- If only a little high maintenance.

"Yeah, it's me."

"Look I know this is real short notice, but I was wondering if you could stop by and work my shift. My boyfriend just flew in and I wanted to meet him at the airport."

Kaoru brought her hand up to her head and attempted smooth her untidy locks.

"When?"

"My shift starts in forty five minutes."

Glancing at the clock on the stove she praised her luck. Kaoru needed an excuse to get out, and this was practically handed to her on a silver platter.

"Sure, no problem."

"Thanks Kia, I appreciate it!"

"Yeah."

Hearing the dial tone Kaoru slowly hung up the phone. Now that she had gotten a hold of herself she felt her anger simmer and grow. How dare he use her body against her! She could still feel his hands on her legs and chest, could still feel his breath ghosting over her ear. Never mind the fact that she had enjoyed his touch immensely, or that if Melinda hadn't called she wouldn't have objected to _anything_ Kenshin may have wanted to do. She didn't want to deal with that piece of information yet.

"Who was on the phone?"

Kenshin's voice tugged Kaoru out of her inner thoughts. Spinning toward the infuriating man, she ignored how calm he looked. He leaned against her bedroom doorway, his eyes still holding the intense look they had had only a few moments ago. They also looked more determined than ever. Her stomach flipped at his gaze, and she pointedly stomped down on the feeling. She had to get out of there before things could get any worse. Not that she thought they really could, everything that could have gone wrong, had most assuredly done so.

She disregarded Kenshin's question.

Turning back to the phone, she dialed Mary's number. Talking to the younger woman she shut out the very male presence in the room. She could feel his eyes on her, taking in her obviously disheveled form. She couldn't help but shiver. How could he make her feel like the sexiest woman in the world with just one look?

Kaoru knew how lucky she was that Mary could babysit on such short notice. Thanking her profusely, and saying a quick goodbye to her son, Kaoru hung up and headed back to the bedroom to change. Maybe she would be able to bring Kenji to the zoo later this week, she didn't like to disappoint him. And she would have to slip Mary an extra couple of dollars the next time she paid her. It just couldn't be helped- she could not deal with Kenshin right now. Still ignoring Kenshin, she walked past him and slammed the door.

Throwing on a bra, a pair of comfy jeans, a sweatshirt, and sneakers she glanced briefly into the mirror. She looked a mess. Grabbing a brush she attempted to smooth her tangled hair. It was no use. Throwing it into a ponytail she grabbed her purse, headed towards the door and wiped at the tear stains that had been visible in her reflection. She had to leave and it had to be now. Making it to the entry way, she found herself spun around and pushed into the wall. Kenshin gazed at her with a less than pleased look on his face.

"I asked who was on the phone Kaoru."

His voice was tight. Drawing on the rage she had been swamped with earlier, she didn't try to hide it.

"That is none of your business. Please leave so I can lock the door."

She was proud that her voice didn't shake. His eyes narrowed at her words.

"Kaoru, I can stand here all day. Tell me who was on the phone and where you are going."

Clenching her fists at her side, Kaoru fought the urge to scream. How could he be so wonderful and so infuriating! Taking a deep breath, she did the only thing she knew would get her out of the apartment. She gave him what he wanted.

"A coworker was on the phone. They needed help so I'm going in. Now if you don't mind, I don't want to be late."

He didn't let her go. Instead he leaned forward and hugged her to his frame. Feeling her body tremble at the sudden affectionate gesture she couldn't help but wrap her arms around him. Shecherished the way he felt beneath her hands, so strong and powerful. Sheadored the way he smelled, the scent of ginger that followed him wherever he went. She loved the way he smiled, his face becoming mischievous, sexy, and sly. Kaoru couldn't help but love him, that was what had made everything that had happened four years ago awful- that was what was making everything that was happening now miserable.

"We still need to finish this conversation."

He pulled back slightly, and her eyes fluttered shut when he brushed his lips across her forehead.

She didn't respond to his words, but nodded her head slightly. Kaoru wasn't sure if she would be able to get out of this anymore, wasn't sure if she wanted to. But what exactly she did want, Kaoru had no idea. She really just needed to think. And he undoubtedly had to think about everything she had revealed as well. Unfortunately. Kaoru was not looking forward to the end of their conversation. He opened the door for her and she stepped out. Not meeting his gaze she locked the door and headed outside. Unsurprisingly, he had vanished from the hallway. She could feel his eyes however as she exited the building and headed down the street towards the Blue Spot.

Keeping her gaze trained forward, she felt her hands itch. The outside air was cold, but Kaoru welcomed the bite in the air. Waiting for a light to change, she glanced quickly at those around her. She knew that he was watching her, knew that he was hidden somewhere in the busy street. Afternoon commuters filled the walkways. Confidently striding across the street, she veered slightly to the left and entered a small telephone booth.

It didn't matter that Kenshin was spying, she didn't think she could make it these next few days without making this call. Kaoru just was not that strong. Pulling out some loose change from her pocket, she dialed a familiar number and waited for someone to pick up.

_Please, just this once…please be there._

"Hello?"

Kaoru let out shaky breath, and fought the sudden tears that sprung to her eyes. The voice was deeper than she remembered, but still held the same curiosity and love of life that she remembered.

"Yahiko."

Her voice sounded wretched even to her own ears. How long had it been since the last time they talked? Seven months? Eight?

"Kaoru? Is that you?"

A smile broke over her face even as she tried not to cry.

"Yeah, its me."

"What's wrong?"

He sounded stronger than the last time they had talked. Kaoru knew that he would do anything to help her. Yahiko wasn't sure what had happened to her in the past, but he had gotten very overprotective of his older sister and nephew. She loved him for that… even if it was a bit aggravating.

"I need you."

She knew she was being selfish again… she couldn't help it. Kaoru wanted her family right now, needed Yahiko. They had fought as children, they still fought at times. But she could trust him completely, she could lean on him for strength while she tried to figure everything out.

"When?"

A soft laugh bubbled up her throat. He was so willing to drop everything for her, so willing to help out his older sister.

"As soon as possible."

She could almost see him nod in response.

"Are you still in Chicago?"

Leaning forward, Kaoru rested her head against the side of the booth.

"Yeah."

She felt her shoulders relax slightly.

"I'll be on the next bus out."

Hearing the sound of him starting to hang up the phone, Kaoru stood up straighter.

"Yahiko, wait!"

"Yeah?"

His voice was near the phone again.

"I… that is…" How could she do this without sounding like a total ass? "I…know I don't say this much… but, I really do… I do lo-"

"It's okay," His voice cut across hers, soft and understanding, "Me too Kaoru, me too."

Her smile grew wider.

"I'll see you soon Kaoru."

* * *

A/N- Well, that took forever- Thank you all for your patience! Please review! And to all my reviewers...Again- I thank you. Because of you, Iwrite. 

Also, I know that this is the shortest chapter I have written... but there was originally going to be another scene tacked on... but then the chapter wouldn't have been out in who knows how long.

Next time- Kenshin thinks back on the night Kaoru mentioned, and Yahiko gets on a bus with something Kaoru isn't expecting.

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	8. Memory

Author's Note- What's this? I do exist? Crazy. Well, I know many of you are probably thinking, "It's about damn time she updated," and to be honest you're quite right. I however find it hard to write when I'm bogged down by other things, so expect most of my updates during the school year to be made during holidays or other school breaks. Homework, unfortunately, has to be done, and obligations need to be filled. On a side note, who do you have to kill to get a decent Anime Club? I might have to travel to another school for my weekly fix.

Second Side Note- Well, I struggled with this chapter a bit. Hopefully it does itself justice-One unfortunate aspect of not having a lot of time to write is that at times, your like, "What did I say again? What happened?"- which is always wonderful…not. So if you're wondering why certain things seemed to be said five hundred times…that why.

* * *

Disclaimer- I am just a fan.

Rating- R/M- Some like it hot.

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Things Left Unsaid

Chapter Eight

Memory

* * *

Kenshin watched Kaoru walk down the street with hooded eyes. Easily staying out of her line of sight he followed her from her apartment at a reasonable distance. His eyes observed her every movement, soaking in each step she took, each swish of her hair against her back. He couldn't stop studying her. Every memory he had of Kaoru seemed to grow in detail as he basked in her presence. The way she walked, the way she smiled, the way her eyes grew dark when she was angry or averted themselves when she was embarrassed- She robbed him of his sanity. She made him complete. How had he survived for so long without her? Kenshin could see the same need in her, why couldn't she recognize it?

Running a hand through his hair in frustration, Kenshin took a deep breath. Finding her in many ways was the easy part. He still needed to convince her that she belonged with him, that he was here and not going anywhere. Even if he was able to convince her, it was probable that Kaoru's own stubbornness may cause her to put up an even greater fight. He rubbed his temple. How was he going to be able to do this? Kenshin was still frustratingly unaware of her specific reasons for leaving. Although she had said a lot, he still only had bits and pieces. His eyes followed her form as she crossed the street, his mind listing off what he did know in his head.

Firstly, she had left for him. That much was obvious. Going over the snippets of what she had said, that was more than abundantly clear. Not only that, but Kaoru had admitted unknowingly that she still loved him. His heart clutched at the memory of her words. _Love your touch, love you_. The emotion beneath those few words had all but melted him. She had sounded so desperate for him, so glad to see him. Her words had made it painfully obvious to him- not to mention the way she had responded to his touch- that he still had her heart. Kenshin had wanted so badly to simply remove her clothes and become intimately reacquainted with her body. Hell, he probably would have if she hadn't gotten a phone call. Kenshin had never felt skin so soft, hair so silky. The memories that sustained him through the last four years seemed pale in comparison. He shivered slightly, his body still hyper sensitive to what had happened in her apartment. He wanted her so badly his body ached. Taking a calming breath, he pushed down the taste of her that still lingered in his mouth and thought back to the facts.

Despite her protests and stubborn closed off attitude, she had not wanted to leave him. But what did she feel she was accomplishing for him through leaving? When he'd asked her Kaoru had mentioned a scar. Which scar had she meant? A physical one on himself? Lord knew he had dozens of them, but many of those had been there before she'd even met him. One of his many emotional scars? He wouldn't even know where to start.

He broke out of his stupor when Kaoru closed herself into a phone booth. Kenshin stopped immediately, darting into a nearby alley to watch her, his brows furrowing in scrutiny. What _was_ she doing? He watched her dial a number, her hands visibly shaking even at his distance. She hadn't been lying about the phone call earlier had she? No. Kaoru was walking to work. He hadn't detected any sort of concealment from her, just a tiredness and an inability to cope with her raging emotions. She had never been able to conceal things from him…well, he'd always thought so before she had disappeared. So in her apartment he had backed off, giving her the time she needed to let herself get her emotions in order. He had hoped that it would make her more willing to accept his presence. It wasn't everyday that he walked back into her life.

He watched her lips form words haltingly, and although far away he did his best to decipher them. She turned from him then, resting her head against the side of the booth, her hands absentmindedly rubbing her left shoulder. The tenseness that was so apparent in her form visibly reduced. The apprehension held in his own body lessened as well. Although at this angle he couldn't make out her mouth, he had caught the first few words.

She had said Yahiko. Her brother. Of course.

He could still remember the close bond the brother and sister had shared while they had been dating. Younger than Kaoru by four years, he had bright intelligent eyes and a huge amount of energy. The two had bickered constantly, but he had seen underneath it a real genuine affection. He had checked up on her family here and there after she had gone missing, but her mother had no idea where she was. Yahiko himself had gone through a serious depression at her absence, a depression that had taken him months, a doctor, and some medication to climb out of.

Kenshin had sent the family a bit of money anonymously to take some of the burden off Kaoru's mother, and had periodically looked for any sort of contact between her and them. Although things had slowly returned to normal, he had never sensed that Kaoru had called or seen them. He was glad that he was wrong. Kenshin didn't want to think that Kaoru had been utterly alone these last four years, and if she was calling her brother- then she hadn't. He hadn't been there, she hadn't allowed it- but Kaoru did have someone to help her in her darker times. Why was she so stubborn?

Kenshin fought the urge to run over and yell at her. Why couldn't she see how much she needed him? How much he needed her? His eyes narrowed as she ended the call and exited the phone booth, brushing at her eyes as she did so. What had they talked about? There was no doubt in his mind that it involved him, he wasn't that blind- but what more was there to it? A call of comfort? Fear? Despair? Kenshin felt his stomach twist at the last thought as he watched her continue down the street.

Following her to the Blue Spot, he finally looked away from Kaoru when she entered her place of work. He continued passed the restaurant front, attempting to get his tangled thoughts under control. Walking into a coffee shop across from the Blue Spot he ordered a cup of tea and sat down near the back. He needed to do some serious thinking while she worked. The next time he saw her, he wanted to have a much better understanding of their situation.

Kenshin had already established that Kaoru hadn't wanted to leave him four years ago. The next questions weren't so easy. How long she had planned it out? What made her decide that leaving was best? Why hadn't she gone to him with the issue? How had she managed to get away so quickly? While dating, he had noticed small changes a week or so before her disappearance. This pointed out that at that time she had already decided to leave.

The biggest clue he had was her mentioning a scar.

She had said that it wasn't his fault. So, the incident involving the scar must have happened while dating her. Probably in the last month or so, if she decided to leave because of it. Taking a sip of the hot beverage, he leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. Resting his chin against his chest, he methodically went through his memories of their time together. Kenshin couldn't think of any incidents in which he gained another scar while in her presence. He had always been careful around her to keep his business and the violence it usually brought far away. Shifting slightly in his chair, he rethought her words.

Kaoru was worried that he might blame himself. If that was the case, then the incident was probably not one that had resulted with himself having a scar. He immediately sat up straighter, a memory already in his mind of such an event.

_Kenshin led Kaoru through the throng of people. He knew that she was still getting comfortable with the club scene, and delighted in the way her eyes gaped at everything with wide eyed excitement. Leading her to an area that was filled with dancers, but not as suffocating as other places, he wrapped his left hand tightly around her waist and let himself get carried away with the heavy beats of the music. Even though she had told him that she hadn't done much clubbing, he was still impressed with the natural way her body moved while dancing. With just a simple twist of her hips, she could drive him practically up a wall. That coupled with one of her innocent smiles…he had spent many a night after dancing with her taking a long cold shower._

_Her hot breath danced along the shell of his ear, and before realizing what he was doing, he had her pressed up against him with his leg pushing itself insistently between hers. Letting her dress get pushed up, Kenshin felt his breath catch as she moved in an increasingly agitated rhythm against him. Although she usually dressed conservatively, the outfit she wore tonight, a tight black dress that made her every curve obvious to him, was making her ministrations all the more blatantly sexual. He wanted her. Right there, on the floor- or in the bathroom- or in the backseat of his car- anywhere. Kenshin needed to feel her underneath him, needed it so much that his body began to shake._

_Knowing that this wasn't the time or the place, he took a deep calming breath and tried to turn the dance into something less provocative. She didn't seem so inclined, and for a moment he was afraid he might actually lose what little self control he had. Grasping at his last straw of restraint, he gently disengaged her form from his. Kaoru looked up at him with a flushed face, her expression showing just how little she was aware of his own inner turmoil. It was one of the many reasons he cared so much for her. The inner light that she had, the willingness to believe the best of others- her naivety toward the effect she had on those around her, himself included. She didn't have a selfish or vain bone in her body._

_He on the other hand…Well, although not particularly vain, Kenshin knew that he was a selfish person. Especially when it came to Kaoru. He had wanted her from the moment he'd seen her. He had needed to have her, to hold that shining light near him. He would fight tooth and nail to keep her near him, and he would damn the consequences. _

_She leaned forward slightly, and Kenshin brushed a stray hair behind an ear. She turned toward his touch, and he felt his heart warm. This magnificent woman was his. Only his. Kaoru let her body melt against his, and he felt his body tighten in anticipation. He needed a moment to gather himself, to cool down. Not even he could handle such a temptation without a bit of time to regroup. _

_"Do you want something to drink?"_

_He spoke the words low and close to her ear. Kenshin felt her slight tremble and smiled against her neck. It was good to know he affected her as much as she affected him. Pulling away he saw her grin and nod. _

_Turning from her, he quickly cut through the crowd toward the bar. It was silly, but he hated leaving her unattended on the dance floor. While dancing with her, he had noticed the looks some of the other men gave her, and didn't like idea of even one of them talking to her. Never mind them asking her to dance. The thought made his blood boil. _

_Nearly to the bar, Kenshin felt the hair on the back of his neck begin to rise. Something, rather suddenly, did not feel right. Letting his eyes scan the crowd, he cursed how thick it had become. Trusting his instincts he moved with determination back to where he had left Kaoru. Better for him to be overreacting than not react at all. It was about halfway back when he heard her voice rise sharply over the still pounding music._

_"Kenshin!"_

_Letting his eyes narrow in anger, Kenshin forgot all about the drinks and darted through the crowd toward her frightened voice. His name was repeated again, the desperate edge in it enveloping him in a cold fury. Whoever had caused his Kaoru this fear would pay dearly. Breaking through the masses, his eyes fell on Kaoru. Her body pulled completely from the floor, she kicked and twisted wildly, the man's hard hold keeping her from disengaging herself. Although frightened she appeared relatively unharmed. That action would probably save the captor's life._

_Kenshin's hard gaze fell to the man holding her. Fuck. He recognized the stupid shit. Some low level from a rival company- a company he had recently royally beat out in a business deal. The man spit words into Kaoru's ear, low enough that Kenshin couldn't hear, and Kenshin felt his world go red even as he saw the color drain from her face. How dare that thing even touch her, let alone talk to her. _

_"Put her down."_

_He could barely identify his own voice- he rarely was able to when feeling such extreme emotion. Kenshin's hand instinctively went to his waist, a low growl sounding in his throat when he realized he didn't have his sword or one of his many guns. The man's hands should be removed for being placed on her- and his tongue cut out for daring to speak to her. _

_Kenshin noticed Kaoru's eyes swiveling toward him, and saw the tears beginning to form in the corners of her eyes. The captor's chances of coming out unscathed were completely gone. The man clutching Kaoru detected him as well, and Kenshin felt a rush of satisfaction at the fear that passed through the man's eyes. Kenshin was certain that the man under a bit of…stress…would scream pitifully. He would have to check to be certain however. _

_He could feel the vicious smirk on his lips. _

_The man could see it as well, taking one than another hesitant step back- dragging Kaoru with him._

_"Stay away from me, stay away or I'll hurt her."_

_The voice was pitiful and squeaky. Disgusting. Kenshin took a steady step forward, knowing that even without a weapon this man would be easy to take down. They had moved closer to one of the walls of the building, and Kenshin was certain the area was empty enough to prevent any bystanders from becoming involved. All he had to do was make sure that Kaoru was safe before making his move. _

_Kaoru met his eyes and Kenshin couldn't help but start at the determined look on her face. Even though it was still obvious she was scared, she was not going to sit around and play the willing victim anymore. Kenshin wanted to shout at her to let him handle it. He couldn't have her taking unnecessary risks._

_She bit at her lip, and Kenshin could see the exact moment she decided to act. Kaoru leaned forward toward the arm clenching her torso down and opened her mouth. He watched her bite down, blood beginning to slosh down the side of the man's arm. The guy screamed in sudden unexpected pain and threw her away from him. Her mouth let go of his arm, and her eyes widened in the abrupt realization that she was flying through the air. Kenshin started toward her, but immediately knew that he was too far away to catch her. She hit the far wall of the club, crying out at the impact, before falling to the hard floor. A large bolt on the wall was smeared with blood. _

The next few moments were a blur to Kenshin, even now. He hadn't killed the man, heaven knew what had stopped him, but he had broken a total of thirteen bones in the man's body. However, he had been right- the man was quite the screamer. Later, after everything had cooled down- he made sure the man never had the chance to bother Kaoru again. He was still shocked at how good that had felt.

Kenshin had called Aoshi to come take care of the mess, and then brought Kaoru to the hospital. She'd lain unconscious for a good hour do the concussion she'd sustained, and had part of her left shoulder ripped due to the bolt on the wall. The doctor had needed to give her stitches, and told Kenshin she was lucky that no more damage had been done with such a forceful impact. Unfortunately however, the mark on her shoulder would scar. He'd never been so scared and pissed in his life. And it had been all his fault. If Kenshin had just kept her with him, if he had just been more studious of their surroundings…there were a thousand things he could have done to change the circumstances. But he hadn't, and she had been hurt.

When she'd awoken, he had clutched at her hand afraid that she would suddenly slip back into unconsciousness. But she hadn't. Her eyes had found his and the first words she'd said were asking if he was okay. Never mind herself, never mind the fact that she had woken up in a hospital with probably a killer headache and a throbbing shoulder. He could feel the small shakes that trembled through her. It made him feel even guiltier. Kenshin had thought even briefly for a moment that she would look at him with accusing eyes, but her eyes showed nothing of the sort. And that was when he knew with absolute certainty that this was it. He could never want anyone else, could never find anyone else who was so right for him. A perfect mix of smarts, strength, innocence, and kindness- it was as if she had been created especially for him.

Later when she'd been released and he'd driven her home, he asked what the creep holding her had said to her. She had tensed, her hands clenching to the point that her knuckles turned white and turned from his inquiring gaze telling him very nicely that she would rather not say. That it didn't matter, all that mattered was that they were both okay.

That was it, that was the event. Kenshin rubbed at his eyes blearily and looked down at his reflection in the wobbly half cup of tea. He was exhausted. When was the last time he had gotten a good night's sleep? Not for a long time.

It had been after that incident that her actions toward him had subtlety shifted. He could see it now. She had never said that the evening had bothered her, had never asked to talk about it with him- he had assumed that she was over the extremeness of it. He had been wrong. How could he have been so naïve? Something about that night, something that he had overlooked until now was the reason that she had felt obligated to leave.

Now that he had finally figured that out, the real work could begin.

* * *

Yahiko slumped in his seat and looked out his window at the changing scenery. Stifling a yawn, he stretched his arms above his head in an attempt to relieve some of their stiffness. He had been on a bus for more than several hours, and could feel the tight space finally start to get to him. Cracking the bones in his neck, he rested his head on his head and eyed the dark landscape.

His reflection stared back at him, and Yahiko took in his bedraggled form. His hair was rumpled and sticking out at odd angles from the nap he'd taken over an hour ago, and his clothes were equally wrinkled and disheveled. Glancing into his own dark brown eyes, Yahiko could see the tiredness and sudden stress in them. After all, it wasn't every day that he got a call from his sister. Kaoru.

It was funny he supposed. Four years ago he hadn't had a care in the world. At only fourteen he had been like most other kids his age. Going to school, active in sports, doing household chores…arguing with his older sister- he had thought that nothing could change. Instead one day he'd woken up with one less family member.

He had gone down to the kitchen for breakfast, knowing that Kaoru and his Mom would already be there eating. Kaoru would call him lazy for sleeping in so late, he would reply that at least he wasn't ugly, and then breakfast would continue. It was a shock to instead find his Mom crying over a cup of coffee, Kaoru nowhere in sight. He remembered briefly asking his Mom what was going on… and she had simply sobbed and motioned to a folded piece of paper on the table.

Yahiko had read the note, read it multiple times, before telling his Mom that it must be some sort of joke. Kaoru wouldn't leave. Why would she leave? He had searched her room, searched the house, search the small yard. He had expected her to be hiding somewhere, waiting to jump out and call him gullible. But she hadn't appeared.

He'd spent the next few weeks in a sort of daze, certain that at any moment Kaoru would be there at breakfast- and it would have all been some sort of weird dream. It hadn't happened, and even as him Mom accepted that she was gone, he had been unable to. He'd skipped school, stayed out all night, and gotten into more trouble in that short amount of time than the rest of his life combined. His mother hadn't known what to do, and to be honest Yahiko hadn't been sure himself.

Yahiko looked at the shifting sleeping figure next to him and shook his head. It had taken a visit from one of Kaoru's friends, Sanosuke, to finally get him straightened out.

He had finally gone somewhere for help, the anger, sadness, and confusion becoming too much for him to bear. And looking back on it now, he was glad that he had been able to. Yahiko wasn't sure what direction his life would have taken if he hadn't.

Several months later, Kaoru had called. It had been a day like any other- just like the day she had disappeared, and he supposed that that was how he would always see it. Of course, it had ended a bit differently. At fifteen he had hopped on a bus to go visit his very pregnant sister in Florida- and then stayed to meet his nephew. Did his Mom have any idea that he hadn't been at a friend's house those few days? He had his suspicions, but she never said anything about his trips- and neither did he.

Yahiko glanced at the man next to him again before trying to smooth out his hair. He recalled the conversation that had led him to this bus. He hadn't been in contact with Kaoru for months, she had told him explicitly that he should never try to contact her- she would contact him. That irked him to no end, but he respected her wishes. He'd been eating pizza, contemplating what to wear to the movies that night with Tsubame, when the phone rang. Sanosuke had been napping on the couch. And of all the people it could have been, he was infinitely thankful that it had been Kaoru.

Too bad she sounded perfectly awful, if only-

"You thinking about the Missy?"

Yahiko jumped slightly in his seat before scowling at the person next to him. Sanosuke was just as bleary eyed as Yahiko, his hair standing at more angles than Yahiko thought possible. His breath smelled atrocious.

"What of it?"

The younger man didn't hesitate in his defensiveness. It was part of their interaction. They could argue and bicker all day in good fun- well, usually good fun.

"Just curious. Either that or you're thinking about your girlfriend- what's her name again? Tsub-"

"She isn't my girlfriend!"

The words were hissed out and Yahiko could feel the blush on his cheeks. He inwardly cursed Sanosuke. The man could push his buttons almost as well as Kaoru.

"Anyway, aren't you going to sleep again or something? I still can't believe you insisted on coming- Kaoru is going to be so pissed."

Sanosuke gave him a look, and Yahiko knew that they were both thinking the same thing. Whatever was happening with Kaoru, she needed the support. The last time she had sounded so upset was when she had called him the first time. Rolling his eyes Yahiko looked back out the window.

"Yahiko, don't worry. Whatever the problem, we'll help."

Sanosuke's voice was quiet in the mostly still bus. His sudden seriousness broke the otherwise light mood. It was hard to enjoy oneself when worried about someone else. And Yahiko was definitely worried about his sister. He almost always was.

"I know."

His voice was quiet and spoken towards the window. Yahiko hated the fact that his sister was so far away. No matter why she had left, he believed wholeheartedly that she needed to come back. Nothing could be solved by running away from one's problems. He had learned that the hard way after she had disappeared.

Yahiko did know it had something to do with Kenshin. The man she had been dating up until her disappearance. Kenshin asking questions after she was gone, and the small amount of information Sanosuke knew had all but confirmed his suspicions. Not to mention Kenji. His small nephew was a replica of Kaoru's ex. Just what had happened between them? Kaoru shied from all his questions, telling him once point blank to cut it out. Kenshin had seemed infatuated with her, had seemed like one of the nicest guys he had ever met, he didn't know what he had done to make her take such extreme measures.

He would find out however. No way would Kaoru spend the rest of her life the way she was now. Yahiko would go to school, get a great job, and help her support herself. He was determined that she would go back to school- there was so much she deserved that she had given up. So much that her son deserved to have. It wasn't her destiny to spend the rest of her life waiting on tables and struggling from paycheck to paycheck.

Who knew what Kaoru would say if she could hear him thinking? Yahiko knew that he was still only eighteen, but he would do whatever was needed to make things right for her. She had practically raised him with their mother working so much.

"Yahiko?"

Yahiko turned from his inner thoughts and back toward his sleep deprived seat mate.

"What is it Sanosuke?"

"Are we almost there?"

Yahiko resisted the urge to pound his head against the window.

"No. I told you when we left that we probably wont arrive until early morning."

He watched the color drain from Sanosuke's face.

"What! That is ridiculous! Can't the bus go any faster! Stupid machine, less trustworthy than a fucking train!"

Ignoring Sanosuke's outburst, Yahiko turned back toward the window. Forming a makeshift pillow with his arm, he shut his eyes and tried to rest. He had a feeling that the next few days would be stressful. And although he was still young, he was determined to be there for Kaoru.

* * *

AN- Wow…I actually finished this. Go me. Thank you all for sticking with me through everything- Your reviews truly mean everything. Please continue to offer your super support. I'm thinking that the next update will be during my Christmas break…so be on the lookout.

Next Time- Kenshin and Kenji bond, Misao and Aoshi reflect.


	9. Resolution

Author's Note-Whoa! I lived through the semester! Boo-yah! Finals were survived, and now that I am without any obligations of any sort, I am in full writing mode. You lucky readers you! THANK YOU all for the reviews. On a side note- One of the most amazing and thrilling feelings is getting a review from an author you love- so, just to let you writers know- You folks don't know how much you inspire me. Hope everyone had a Happy Holiday.

PS- I know that a few people have wondered if I'm planning on finishing this. Well, I really hate leaving things undone- so even if it takes me to the end of time, I am still going to end it. No worries.

PSS- On a completely different note, I got this new lotion for the Holidays that smells like Buttercream Frosting….I'm just saying, I practically ate my own hand.

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General Disclaimer- In my mind….totally….In real life….not so much 

Rating R/M- Have your cake and eat it too….mmmmm cake, almost as good as Buttercream Frosting….

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Things Left Unsaid 

Chapter 9

Resolution

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Aoshi drank deeply from the tea in front of him, closing his eyes briefly at the calmness the hot drink evoked. Opening his eyes, he took in the dimly lit restaurant around him, watching the other patrons go about their daily lives. An older couple sat in comfortable silence a few tables away, while a mother and child stood at the take out counter ordering and a couple of college aged girls sipped on their coffees in a back booth. Their conversations were low and murmured. He had found the small café the second time he had taken Misao out for lunch, and it had become a haunting ground for them whenever he was in town. The atmosphere was calm, the food was excellent, and the customer service was good but not overbearing. In his mind, a perfect place to relax. Well, he supposed that others wouldn't find his demeanor relaxing, but he could feel the difference. 

The person across from him shuffled in her seat, idly twirling her hot cocoa with a spoon, and Aoshi let his eyes absorb her shifting form. Her dark hair had been pulled back into a very messy braid, and she wore a sweater that barely fit her frame, falling nearly to his knees. It was one of his. She nibbled at her nails, something she had been doing for over a half an hour, and he felt her periodically glance at him from beneath the thick fall of her bang. He had tried telling her several times to stop chewing on her fingers before she ruined them, but every time just a few minutes later she would be at it again. He stopped asking her.

Aoshi supposed that she had plenty to be nervous about.

That morning when he had met Kenshin at the airport, he had met a very different person. The man's hair had been in disarray, his clothing had been wrinkled and worn, and his demeanor had been a strange mix of anticipation, determination, and impatience. Kenshin had been curt with him, but had accepted all the information Aoshi gave with a sort of greedy desperation. Seeing a man that he had infinite respect for tearing at the seams because of a woman, he had felt an equal apprehension suddenly. Misao was very slowly spinning away from him. Their relationship was as strong as it was fragile, and after seeing Kenshin the hard truth struck him like a bullet in the back.

He needed Misao, that was a certainty.

He hadn't depended on anyone for years, hadn't needed anyone for years. His subordinates knew him well, but they were not privy to his most intimate thoughts. Kenshin was like a brother, but even he didn't know everything about him. None of them saw his weaknesses. Only Misao.

He had been dismissed from Kenshin earlier, and could only think of her. He didn't know what she wanted, didn't know if she was in it for the long haul. And for some reason that aggravated him to no end. Aoshi could not see himself without Misao, she had somehow snuck in and burrowed deeply into his life. He wanted her to transfer schools, move to New York to be with him- and he wanted her to want to move.

He had finally gotten back to the hotel, thinking that after she woke up they could discuss the future. Instead he had seen her in the bathroom, bent over with a look of annoyance on her face. He had always had a thing for black. The control that had been stretched last night had finally broke, and he had acted without thought. The idea of her leaving him was just to much to handle. He was not proud of himself, or the lack of restraint he had over his actions. Aoshi had been rougher than he usually was and had done all that he could to make every sigh or gasp she uttered turn into a moan or scream of pleasure.

He felt lucky that none of their neighbors complained.

Aoshi could only count a few other times that he had acted in such an uninhibited way. He had continued until her voice had been weak, and her body boneless and trembling. Even then he hadn't stopped, Misao being eventually so overloaded that she could do little but accept the pleasure he gave to her. Aoshi had been determined to make her see how much she required him, how important he was to her. Realizing that they had a checkout time of two, he had finally relented his assault on her senses and gotten them both into the shower, packing his bag after while she napped on the bed.

Misao and him had stopped at the restaurant shortly after checking out. She'd been quiet the whole way over. He had hoped the familiar place would help to incite a conversation that was long over due. Watching her sip daintily from her mug and then begin a one sided conversation about an English class she was in, he knew that she wouldn't be the one to start it. Aoshi adored Misao, but knew that she hated thinking negatively, that she would rather eat glass than actually talk about their problems. That was just the way she was. If she wanted things to be running smoothly than her subconscious did everything it could to block out things that would be detrimental to her reasoning.

She hadn't mentioned anything about this morning or his lack of restraint. Even though he knew that Misao had to be curious about his actions. He could see that she was still tired from their earlier work out, the faint circles under her eyes a testament to that. He watched her pull at the hood of her sweater, trying unsuccessfully to hid the marks marring her neck. Eyeing the marks he grinned inwardly. He simply could not help himself. Misao's throat was long, slender, exquisite-and the noises she made while he nibbled…it was enough to drive him crazy. And of course it felt good when he left her to know that she had something to remember him by. That every time Misao looked in the mirror when he was away, she would see the marks and recall his touch. He had never thought himself a possessive man until he had met her.

Dragging his eyes away from the faint mark on her neck, he glanced up at her face. She was staring at him expectantly.

"Are you listening?"

She tilted her head prettily, furrowing her brow in a way that could only be called adorable. How could he convince her that moving was the right thing?

"I'm sorry about this morning."

He hadn't meant to say that. He hadn't planned on mentioning it at all. The unexpected words left a sour taste in his mouth. Another weakness that was only for Misao. He couldn't help himself, and it made him sick. What had she thought it? Usually a person's opinion mattered to him as little as a bothersome fly, but with her….everything was different. He cared what she thought. Misao blush a deep scarlet, shrugged her shoulders, and neck of her shirt nearly shifted off. She hastily adjusted it.

"I understand if you're mad Misao. I should have been more careful."

He had never seen Misao censure herself for him, and he was afraid of her doing it now. Would she? Trying to read the emotions on her face, he was shocked by the look of anger that was suddenly there. He guessed she really was outraged and knew it was true than. He was a disgusting person that had abused the person he cared for the most.

"No!"

Her voice was a vehement refusal. What she was refusing, he wasn't sure.

"Aoshi, don't be sorry about this morning…don't." She tugged at the end of her braid, "I couldn't stand it if you were sorry…It was….It wasn't….just don't be sorry. Okay? It was intense, yes…but it wasn't bad…not at all."

The blush on her cheeks spread down her neck. She shut her eyes in obvious embarrassment. He realized that she was trying to say something important. She always seemed stuttered when she was.

"You were very, that is….I'm not angry and…" her hands were furiously twisting the edge of her shirt. She opened her eyes and looked him directly in the eye, "It was amazing, in a very good way."

Oh. He supposed that took care of that. Aoshi could feel the very faint start of redness on his face. When was the last time he had blushed? When was the last time someone had made him feel embarrassed? He resisted the urge to look away from her. The words soothed some feathers he didn't realize were ruffled, and he let out a quiet sigh of relief. She accepted him when intense and a out of control. Did that mean that she would be receptive to all of him, parts that she probably couldn't even comprehend? He supposed there was only one way to find out.

"We need to talk."

He had never been considered a flowery speaker by those who knew him, in fact, he prided himself on it. Aoshi felt no need to beat around the bush with meaningless words. If something needed to be said, it was said. Otherwise, why would he waste his time and others by prattling on? Thank goodness Misao understood that about him. Now Misao's voice was something different. Although at times she couldn't seem to control all the words coming out of her mouth, he never felt the urge to tell her to be quiet.

Her mouth was open now. Aoshi heard the audible click as she shut it.

"What do you mean?"

Her voice had gotten very quiet, and her eyes studied her hands.

"Misao," how could he possibly phrase this? "I really have enjoyed your company over these last few months."

Eyes widening, he watched her shrug her shoulders in an over exaggerated move. He could see the forced nonchalant ness.

"I've had a good time too."

Her voice sounded dead, defeated. What could she possibly be thinking? She'd had a good time? What did that mean? That he was a good distraction? Aoshi hadn't felt so indecisive since he had been a young boy. He reached across the table and placed his hand over hers. She jumped at the sudden touch, and he watched her eyes find his reluctance.

"We can't continue like this."

He hadn't meant for his words to sound so definite. He hadn't meant to sound so uncompromising. Aoshi just knew that she had to be aware that this long distance relationship couldn't continue forever. It trapped them in a middle stage and prevented their relationship from growing. And he couldn't maintain being with her on such a small scale.

Her mouth opened again, and Aoshi could see the emotions racing across her face.

"Well, I know what you mean, but I thought that you were having a good time, and I thought that you liked being with me, and that you …you…cared about this, but then again I guess if you don't think that this, that is…that this is working…then…then I…I-"

He listened to her babble, attempting to make sense of her words. Aoshi felt her pull at her hand under his, and he tightened his grip. She was obviously more frazzled than he had previously thought. Deciphering her words, he felt his heart clench. Did she think he was breaking up with her?

"Maybe I should just go Aoshi…I…I don't want you to feel like you need to hang out with me if you don't want to, that is…I don't want you to, I just thought…"

She was close to tears and pulling desperately at her hand. Damn it all. How could he make an already difficult conversation even worse?

"Misao I don't want you to leave."

She had turned her head away from his, and he could see her shoulders trembling.

"Really Misao, I want you to stay with me."

And that was the truth more than he thought possible. He wanted her to stay with him. Not just in the restaurant, not just for the weekend…he wanted her to stay by his side always.

He let out a frustrated breath and ran his hand through his hair.

"Misao, I want you to move to New York."

There he had said it, in the easiest and most straight forward way. Like he should have done in the first place. He scrutinized her reaction, watching her eyes widen and her body still. Aoshi had put it all out there- he had said exactly what he wanted. The question was, what did she want? He had thought her dedicated, but what if she wanted something different then he did?

"What?"

Her voice was high pitched and squeaky. It was actually pretty cute. He did hate repeating himself however.

"I want you in New York."…_with me. _He didn't voice the thought aloud, "I'll help you find a new school, a place to work, and an apartment."

He wanted her with him in his home, warming his bed and lighting up his everyday life, but understood that for her it may still be a bit soon. She was only twenty, and still a child in many ways- The world was still a big place full of great things. Her body was tense, and he noticed that she was no longer attempting to remove her hand from his.

"What?"

She seemed to be still stuck at the beginning of the conversation.

"You want me…in New York?"

Her voice was still shaking slightly. She was watching his shoulder, seemingly unable to look him in the eye.

"Why Aoshi?"

He barely heard the words come out of her mouth. Why? She wanted to know why? How could he express the amount of need he had for her? How could he possibly show her how much her presence calmed and soothed him? He swallowed.

"I need you with me."

As soon as he said the words, he heard repeated back to him the whispered phrase she had spoken earlier. _Aoshi, I need you_. Did she feel what he felt? Was it too soon to say that he thought he was in love with her? Aoshi couldn't say the words yet, hadn't said them in too many years too count. She looked flabbergasted.

"Really?"

He had always known that the distance put a strain on their relationship, but he had never been able to see just how deep it ran until now. Misao didn't think that he needed her, didn't know that his blood burned for her. She was insecure in their relationship, and knowing how little he expressed himself, he couldn't blame her for her insecurity. He took a long swallow of his rapidly cooling tea.

"Yes Misao, I do need you."

"New York? But that is so far away…and school…and family...and…and…"

She seemed to be talking to herself, and Aoshi could see the closed off expression on her face. He felt a sinking feeling of trepidation in his gut. He had said that he needed her, said that she was important. Would that be enough? Aoshi wasn't sure he could say much more. He was asking her to make a big change for him, a huge change for him. And now that he had admitted that she was needed, would that demonstration of weakness be his undoing? And even if she initially said yes, he couldn't let her move and become more involved with him without a deeper explanation of his work. He did not move in the same circles that ordinary people did. He hadn't for years. Could she accept the violent and cold side of him?

He put enough cash for the meal, a tip, and a cab ride for Misao on the table.

"Think about it Misao, and call me if you want to talk. There's been a change of plans so I'll be in town for the next few days. There are more things we need to discuss." He stood up and slid a scrap of paper in front of her, "Here's the number you can reach me at if my cell is off."

She didn't acknowledge him, and Aoshi could practically see her mind churning. Misao would call…wouldn't she? Shrugging on his coat, he leaned forward, and kissed her on the cheek, breaking his own unspoken word on public displays of affection. She turned into his touch, and he let his lips meet hers in a chaste kiss.

Leaving her sitting in her chair, he headed out of the restaurant-the vision of Kenshin's broken form suddenly in his mind. He wouldn't be like that, wouldn't allow Misao to slip through his fingers. Although he was giving her some space to think, Aoshi wasn't going to give her up without a fight. Whether Misao knew it or not, Aoshi was not going to roll over and let her leave.

Even if it killed Aoshi, he would see Misao in New York.

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Kenshin ghosted down the street, his attention honed in on the woman in front of him. There was a bite in the air, and both of their breaths came out in small cloudy puffs. The street itself was half filled with people going about their lives, at just after seven the work rush was finally over. He slipped easily between those on the street, his body barely needing to register the people around it. They didn't even look twice at him. Turning the corner she had just turned, he watched her shiver and pull her sweater closer. He frowned at her obvious discomfort. Although he was without a coat, he barely noticed the chill. He should have made sure that Kaoru had taken a coat with her when she had left earlier. She paused under a street light, the tired slump of her shoulders a dead give away to the exhaustion she felt. Kenshin stayed out of her eyesight, unsure of how she would react to him. 

He had hoped that after she got off of work they could finally get to the bottom of their situation. In the best case scenario they would have not only worked out their kinks, but she would have allowed him to introduce himself to her body again. Something that he was dying to do. However, he had glanced in at her in work and the place had been swamped. Dressed as a pirate, she had practically been running from table to table, eye patch and all. Stray hairs had stuck to her face, and her cheeks had been flushed with exertion. Seeing her after work doubly confirmed it, she wouldn't be up to any sort of conversation tonight. He wasn't even sure if she would be comfortable with him nearby. She was still confused and easily excitable when it came to Kenshin, and he realized that a more stealthy approach may be best.

It was aggravating, incredibly infuriating. He had finally figured out her reason for leaving, but was stuck with just his point of view. Had Kaoru left because she had been injured and was afraid of getting hurt again? No, he couldn't imagine her leaving for that reason. And what had that disgusting brute whispered cruelly into her ear? He needed answers.

Kaoru ducked down into her street, and he pursued. Now wasn't the time to be letting his mind wander. Glancing behind her at the sudden noise of a vehicle passing, Kenshin stepped into a side alley to avoid her sight. Hearing the door to her apartment complex open then close, he exited the side street and continued to her building. A newspaper blew across his feet as he reached the door, and ignoring it he entered the building after her. The place was still as shabby as he remembered.

Pausing a few doors away from hers, he halted his footsteps. Shaking his head at his own behavior, he couldn't help but contradict himself. Here Kenshin was outside of her door, even when he knew that she wasn't up to visitors. Especially not him. Rubbing at his temple, he battled his own resolve. What was he supposed to do? Kaoru was tired, exhausted. But in that condition leaving her to her own devices was simply unacceptable. She was no longer alone, he wouldn't allow her to face her demons by herself. He was in it for the long haul, for better or worse. The sooner she realized that, the better.

Now was not the time to back off, not when he was so close.

Putting up a hand to knock on her door, he paused with it half way raised. After this morning who knew if she would even answer her door. Especially if she wasn't expecting anyone. There was no need to alert Kaoru to his presence before it was necessary. Bringing his hand to the doorknob instead, he grinned at its locked state. Even though she was living in a wretched neighborhood she still had the smarts to lock her door. Picking the lock easily, he promised himself that she wouldn't have to fear a break in every again.

Cracking open the door, he stepped inside and closed it quietly behind him. The lights in the kitchen and living room were off. Slipping off his shoes, he listened to the apartment attempting to figure out exactly where Kaoru and Kenji were. The sound of a shower running was audible in the background, and as he went deeper into the apartment he noticed a glow coming out from beneath Kaoru's bedroom door. Peeking through a small crack in the slightly ajar door, he spotted a red head snuggled up underneath the covers on Kaoru's bed, the television displaying an eerie glow in the otherwise unlit room.

He watched Kenji stifle a yawn, his small hands fisting themselves in the blankets. Unable to not smile at the picture his son made, he walked into the room with the grin still in place. The abrupt movement had Kenji's head turning, and Kenshin immediately spoke up to soothe the child.

"Hey Kenji, it's me Kenshin, remember me?"

It wasn't the most clever phrase he had spoken, but he hoped the child wouldn't cause a scene. His own son thinking of him as a burglar or bad guy was simply unacceptable. He sat down on the edge of the bed as Kenji pulled himself out of the covers and into a sitting position. The boy nodded his head at Kenshin's words even as he rubbed at his eyes. A worn stuffed animal of a cat rested next to him. Kenshin felt his smile grow at the picture in front of him. Kaoru was obviously in the shower.

"How was your day Kenji?"

He moved backwards deeper onto the bed, allowing his back to rest on the wall. Kenji moved up next to him, curling up near him. Wrapping his arm around the young boy's shoulders, he watched Kenji adjust himself so that he was resting against him.

"It was okay. Mary and me played Chutes and Ladders, and then we finger painted, and then we had sandwiches, and then after that we watched Aladdin, we also ate macaroni for dinner and she made the spiral kind, and then Mom came home. She's showering and then she promised to read me a story."

He didn't pause in his quick words, and Kenshin attempted to process the long sentence from the sleepy child. At full charge the kid was probably positively a bundle of energy. Kenji burrowed deeper into Kenshin's side, pausing briefly to pull the stuffed kitty closer.

"I wish Mommy could have spent the day with me."

The boy's voice was quiet against his frame, and Kenshin couldn't help but run a hand through his son's messy hair.

"I know."

And he did. Kaoru may have been working for money so that Kenji and her could survive, but that didn't change the truth. She was missing out on parts of Kenji's life, and he was getting to the age where he noticed. Kaoru surely realized that she had an exceptional son, a son that was intelligent and comprehending at such a young age.

"Mommy still likes me right?"

Kenji's voice was quiet in the dark, and Kenshin felt his body still at the child's seriousness. He pulled the boy closer to him. Despite all his smarts, Kenji was still a young boy that desperately loved his mother, and needed assurances that she really did care for him- Especially because she had to be away so often.

"Your Mom likes you more than anything else." Kenshin knew without a doubt that she did, "She just has to work a lot so that you guys can have all the nice things you do. She takes care of you."

Looking down at Kenji, the kid stared back up at him. Kenshin could see the relief that his words had brought to the child. He tugged at one of the ears on his stuffed animal.

"I like you."

The words were plain spoken and soft, but Kenshin heard them none the less. Kenji liked him. He felt like he was walking on cloud nine.

"I like you too Kenji."

Grinning up at Kenshin, the boy turned his head and rested it against Kenshin's forearm.

"Do you like my Mommy too?"

Though the words were innocent Kenshin could feel his heart beat speed up. He was having a conversation with his son. His son liked him. His son was nestled next to him and slowly drifting to sleep. Kaoru and him had produced a son, and she was in the other room. It was something that had been unimaginable only days before.

"I do."

More than liked. He was obsessed with Kaoru, he loved her. It ecstasy just to share the same air with her.

"Mommy takes care of me because she likes me, right?" The poor kid was practically talking in his sleep, "Does that mean that you are going to take care of Mommy from now on?"

Kenshin's mind turned over the child's simplified logic. It was obvious that the boy cared desperately for his mother, that he was worried about her and wanted to take care of her. But Kenji seemed to recognize that he wasn't nearly strong enough to do so. Kaoru took care of him, and because Kenji couldn't take proper care of her- he needed to find someone to do so that he approved of. At such a young age, Kenji was amazing, and Kenshin couldn't have been more proud.

"Not just your Mom, Kenji. I want to help her take care of you too, if that is alright with you."

Kenji murmured his assent, even as he finally succumbed to dream land. Holding the child close to him, he rubbed the boy's shoulders and half watched the flickering television. He had been worried for a while that Kenji wouldn't accept him, that his son would instead decide to hate him. It was a fear he had never voiced, but one that had worn him down more than he thought that it had. It felt good to know that Kenji liked him. And with time and bonding, he was hopeful that it would grow into love.

A family. Kenshin was so close to having Kaoru back, to gaining a son. He just needed to work through Kaoru's stubbornness. And sitting there with his child resting against him, he felt his already unshakable resolve harden further. Kaoru was his, Kenji was their son, and nothing she did or say would change that.

He heard the shower turn off and did his best to clear his suddenly muddled thoughts. Finding himself suddenly very tired he leaned his head back against the wall and waited for Kaoru to emerge. She would undoubtedly be angry as hell, and he hoped the sleeping child would curb her more vicious words and actions. She was beautiful though when she was angry, her cheeks flushed and her eyes flashing. Fuck, who was he kidding? He couldn't think of one instance that he hadn't found her enchanting. It was true then, and it certainly was true now.

The facet turned on and he muffled a yawn that tried to creep its way out of him. He hadn't realized he was so drained. Kenshin had done some running around for work while she was on shift, but he hadn't thought he'd over exerted himself. No fights, no broken bones, no need to get…serious, the branch he'd worked with had been cooperative and friendly. He wasn't still jet lagged was he? It didn't feel like jet lag. Then again…he hadn't really slept in the last twenty four hours since discovering Kaoru's whereabouts. Kenji shifted in his sleep and Kenshin used the movement as an excuse to settle himself into a more comfortable position. Giving up the fight to keep his eyes open, he allowed them to close.

Unaware of the facet shutting off, or the bathroom light following suit as the door opened, he lay in the comfortable space between wakefulness and slumber. Jerking out of his nearly restful state, he heard Kaoru's intake of breath at the sight of them curled up on her bed. Instead of harsh words at his sight however, he was pleasantly surprised when she didn't voice any sort of complaint. No sharp slaps or crude profanities.

Hearing her footsteps as she crossed the room toward them, he didn't move. How would she react? She was likely to think that he was asleep, how would it change her actions toward him? He was anxious to gain a better understanding of her thoughts. She loved him, yes…but a person could also feel anger and other emotions toward the same individual they cared for. He needed to know all that he could, and was more than willing to use that information to his advantage. The edge of bed dipped as she sat on it, and Kenshin tried not to lean into her touch when he felt her hand brush away his bang. Her skin felt amazing against his, and he unconsciously drew up the memory of the two of them earlier in her bedroom. She had been so soft, so pliant, so eager. Still feigning sleep, he took a calming breath.

Her hand removed itself, but the weight on the bed remained, and he realized that she was situating herself for sleep as well. He wasn't sure what she could be thinking, but at the moment he didn't care. Although a rather tight fit, he felt himself smile inwardly at the picture they made with Kenji between them.

He knew without needing to open his eyes that they looked like a family. And he would fight tooth and nail to make it true.

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AN: YEAH! Chapter 9 is done! Chapter 9 already? Wow, time sure flies. This Chapter gave me a bit oftrouble, I guess you could say that I am more comfortablewriting shorterfics than long ones.I tend to get muddled. One of my New Year's resolutions for 2006 is to update once a month, so I will do my best to keep on track and on schedule. Again, thank you all for your lovely reviews- and feel free to leave me one for this Chapter. Whether it is your first or your fifteenth review, every one is read and appreciated. 

NEXT CHAPTER- Kaoru discovers a certain someone in her bed (wink), Yahiko attempts to fix his permanently mussed hair, and Misao tries to do some serious thinking while dressed as a cave woman.

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	10. Waking

AN- Thank you all for your great responses. I was looking through some of the older ones, and many of them made me smile or even laugh. Can you believe I started this the DAY after I posted the last chapter? Having nothing to do over break is simply wonderful. I can write to my heart's content. Unfortunately…it never goes quite as I planned… as it is officially near the end of February, and I have not updated…This semester is just killing me. Anywho…Looking back I also see that I tend to rant…. Sorry about that, I'll try to keep it to a minimum.

PS-This chapter was a bit hard to write, but I think I know what I'm doing…haha…

PSS- I have gotten several emails/responses wondering if I am going to continue writing this. No worries, I'm in it for the long haul. I also have several other K and K fics planned.

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General Disclaimer- Yeah, I totally own Kenshin and his hot body…not, but I can wish. If I had my own personal Kenshin…I totally wouldn't be writing this, I'd be…otherwise occupied.

Rating R/M- You think Kenshin is a bunny hugger? I think not.

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Things Left Unsaid

Chapter 10

Waking

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Kaoru snuggled deeper into the mattress, sighing to herself at the comfortable feelings that the warmth invoked. Her eyelids felt heavy and her body was more relaxed than she thought possible. Feeling positively delicious, she scooted slightly backwards, enjoying the way her bed seemed to curve protectively around her frame. She hadn't sleep so well in ages. Keeping her eyes shut against the natural light coming through the window, she allowed herself the pleasure of laying boneless, letting the heat of the sun warm her skin. She felt rested, light, and better than she had in a long time.

She could sense her comforter lying loosely around her calves, a place it often wandered to during the night, and the shirt she had worn to bed had ridden up just over her hip. The air was surprisingly nice against her bare skin, and coupled with the warmth, she felt like a cat stretched out under the heat of the afternoon sun. She toyed with the idea of actually moving. Still mostly asleep, she sighed aloud and rejected the notion of struggling out of bed. She'd wait until Kenji came to wake her up. Knowing how much of an early riser he usually was, Kaoru knew that he would be along soon. For now she would enjoy the soft mattress and the dream world she was still half immersed in.

Something warm tickled the back of her neck, and she tilted her head unconsciously to give it better access. Her nerves jump started at the sensation, and she could feel goose bumps starting to form on her arms and neck. It felt wicked. The feeling was familiar to her, and she frowned slightly in an effort to remember from what. It happened again and she shivered against a seemingly more substantial shape behind her. A shape that was feeling less and less like a bedspread or a bed. Her brain fought against the sleepy fuzz that still held its attention. Yep, the shape wasn't a blanket or a mattress…it was firm, significant. And it was wrapped around her back like a second skin.

Shifting her weight in an attempt to wake her self up, she froze at the feeling of flesh on her stomach and chest. Mentally taking inventory of her limbs, Kaoru determined quickly that one limb definitely wasn't her own. A feeling that she hadn't registered until now. An arm was wrapped around her bare waist, the hand attached to it resting beneath her shirt and cupping one of her bare breasts. She could feel the rough calluses on his fingers, and became suddenly much more aware of the solid body behind her. It radiated warmth and strength, and she could feel his legs entangled with her own. Ginger filled the air. The heat that had been pleasant before was suddenly stifling, her mind rapidly becoming aware of each part of her body pressed intimately against his. She bit her lip at the memories of the night before that came flashing back.

_Kaoru was exhausted. No, that was an understatement, Kaoru was dead on her feet. Pulling her sweater closer to her cold frame, she desperately tried to ignore the aching in her feet- the trembling of her legs- the soreness that ran throughout her entire frame. Disregarding the stray pieces of hair that clung to her still sweat dampened face, she trudged through the streets at a slow steady pace. _

_Work had been…awful. Her mind attempted to make sense of the busy and hazard filled evening. The whirlwind of people, food, and ridiculous costumes. It had started out innocently enough. They'd gotten the dinner rush, and Kaoru had walked briskly from table to table in her outrageous and horrendous pirate costume, taking orders and making polite conversation. It was on the way to being a very productive evening. Tips had been good, and the customers had been less aggravating than usual. _

_Of course, then they had gotten an after dinner rush. The amount of people entering had been three times more than what The Blue Spot usually received. Kaoru had been double then triple sat, her body slowly going into overdrive as the evening progressed. She had walked from table to table, then jogged from table to table- her lungs and legs both beginning to burn as time passed. The customers had gotten progressively stupider, and the thick fabric of her costume created a trapped feeling that only increased. _

_Halfway through the evening she'd noticed Misao on the other end of the restaurant, and nearly stopped in her tracks. Dressed as a cavewoman the young woman had looked pissed off and confused at the same time. And she seemed to be talking to herself. Her poor customers weren't sure what to make of her. Of all the people working tonight, Kaoru had not expected to see Misao. In fact she had been certain that Misao would be spending the evening wrapped around her visiting boyfriend. She'd tried to talk to the girl about it, unsure as to whether or not they were close enough for her to do so. Misao had responded with false cheerfulness- before avoiding Kaoru like the plague. _

_Kaoru turned another corner and ignored the sounds of the city around her. She had never wanted to take a hot shower more. Waiting for a light to change, she stifled a yawn with the back of her hand._

_When work had finally slowed she had been in abject misery. Practically ripping the heavy costume from her form, she had wiggled back into her own comfy clothes. Seeing Misao sitting in the back booth, idly picking at a salad, Kaoru again had tried to make sure she was alright. It just wasn't like Misao to be so down, and as exhausted as she was she still knew that Misao was the closest thing she had to a friend. Misao had been non-committal, saying only that things were fine…and she was only a little stressed. Right. Kaoru had said enough similar things to know when someone was being less than truthful. _

_Pushing the evening from her mind, she entered her apartment building with only one goal in mind- sleep. Her feet practically dragging, she made her way down the empty hallway, and entered the apartment. Taking a quick look at her surroundings, she immediately heard Kenji's cry of glee as he came running from the living room at un unruly gait. His hair was frazzled, and it tickled at her nose. Scooping him up in her arms, she ignored the brief flash of discomfort in her limbs and held him close. He smelled like cherry popsicles. _

_"Did you guys have a nice time tonight?"_

_Mary followed shortly after him, her own smile wide and laughing. _

_Kaoru listened as her son ticked off the many events him and Mary had done. She leaned over and grabbed a twenty out of her purse, handing it to Mary before she forgot._

_"Thanks for babysitting on such short notice."_

_And she really was ecstatic. Kaoru had needed that time to simply loose herself, to not think of a certain red haired individual that had sprung up seemingly out of nowhere. She would admit to herself that having him around was painful, that every moment she spent in his presence made her want to just spill her guts. She didn't even want to think about his touch. The way his hands had caressed her frame earlier, how close she had come to clawing at the clothes on his body. Kaoru was perfectly aware that if she had done that he wouldn't have objected. Hell, he probably would have helped her. She wondered if his skin still felt the same, if his hair would still slide smoothly through her fingertips like it used to. The memories she had of him from the past were wonderful, but they paled in comparison to the real thing. _

_She said her goodbyes to Mary quietly, going through the weekly schedule with her before she left. Carrying Kenji to his room, she helped him pull on his sailboat pajamas, noting the way he seemed to talk himself out of energy._

_"And then, and then Mary and I made a house out of blocks, and you should have seen it. I can make one with you too if you want…cause I'm really good at building blocks…at least Mary thinks I am. Do you think I am?"_

_She nodded her assent._

_"You are the best builder I know sweetie."_

_His smile grew even greater, and he pulled at the loose strands of her hair. _

_"So tomorrow can we build something?"_

_His voice was hopeful and it caused her grin to grow soft and watery. She would do that with him. She would make the time._

_"Of course honey. Tomorrow we'll build ourselves a huge fortress."_

_Kenji's hands clapped in glee. It saddened her that such a small thing would make him happy. She was an awful mom…she was horrible. She would need to get better, she would need to get stronger. Kenji was depending on her._

_"Alright buddy, I need to jump in the shower. Why don't you sit on my bed and then I'll read you a story."_

_"The one with Hunny Bunny?"_

_He spoke curled against her shoulder._

_"Of course, one Hunny Bunny story coming up."_

_Grabbing Kenji's stuffed cat, Momo off the bed, she carried him to her room and bundled him up in her covers. He yawned wildly, his little mouth opening into a large 'o'. His free hand curled around the stuffed animal and she watched him pull the animal closer. _

_Stepping into the bathroom, she quietly undressed and turned on the shower. Pulling the curtain behind her as the hot water hit her sore muscles, she found her thoughts returning to Kenshin. Her hands traced the places he had touched earlier, and her mind conjured up the image of his strong body hunched protectively over hers. It had been wonderful…it had been terrible. _

_She had expected him to knock on the door the minute she was back. She had the situation all planned out. Kenshin would have knocked, and she would have ignored it and kept the door locked. Kaoru would have pretended he wasn't even there, and he would have gone away. At least, that's how it had happened in her mind. He hadn't come however, and that seemed to be causing her even more worry. What was he planning? He hadn't given up, had he? She wanted him to stop, she should be thrilled that he was leaving her alone. _

_So why did Kaoru feel miserable?_

_Washing away the lingering scent of food and sweat, she turned off the stream of water with a twist of her hand. She couldn't take a long soak with Kenji outside alone. Stepping out of the shower, she towel dried her hair and ignored the warm chain around her neck. Quickly dressing in a loose long sleeve shirt and a clean pair of underwear, she braided her thick locks efficiently and turned off the overhead light. _

_Opening the door quietly, she walked out and waited for her eyes to adjust. Was Kenji still awake? She was ready to read him a story and send him off to lullaby land. Hunny Bunny, even that story made her grin. The lump in her bed was larger than Kenji, and she frowned in an attempt to figure it out. Had Kenji bunched up all the blankets? Her eyes came into focus, and she started at the plethora of dark red hair spread out across her pillow. Her heart fluttered at the sight, beating itself against her rib cage almost painfully. Kenshin lay in her bed, with Kenji next to him. They were both asleep, Kenji curled up in a content ball- his soft snores echoing through the room. She bit her lip at the sight. The look between the two of them was darling. They looked amazing together. In her mind she had sometimes pictured Kenshin and Kenji together, but never had they looked so much like…family. They belonged together and maybe…maybe even if she and Kenshin couldn't…be together…the father and son could become better acquainted. Maybe. She didn't acknowledge the relief she felt at his presence. _

A couple of times on the way home she had sensed some sort of presence that she usually associated with Kenshin, but in her exhaustion she had ignored it- too tired to care. As long as he kept her distance, she didn't care. Kaoru wasn't sure what she wanted to do with Kenshin, what she wanted to say.

After watching them sleep for several minutes she had come to a simple realization. She was worn out and ready for bed, but her bed was otherwise occupied. Kaoru hadn't had the heart to wake and move Kenji, and she hadn't been sure what Kenshin would do if he woke up. She had debated sleeping on the couch or in Kenji's room, but the couch was uncomfortable, and Kenji's bed was way to small. So she had done the only thing she could think of and packed in next to Kenji.

Now, however, Kaoru wasn't sure if crawling into her bed had been a good idea. It had seemed innocent last night, but this morning, with Kenji nowhere in sight, she was left feeling some sort of anticipation. It probably had something to do with the man snuggled up against her back. She needed to figure out a way to disentangle herself from him. He was probably still asleep, at least…she hoped he was.

Had he wrapped himself around her in such a suggestive way knowingly, or was it an unconscious act in his sleep? Which would she prefer? Either way, this…position…was making her feel… uncomfortable. Trying to subtly shift away from him, Kaoru stilled when the body around her moved. If possible he fit his frame even closer to hers, and the arm touching her pulled her closer. The hand on her chest moved, and Kaoru heard the loud sound of her breathe catching. It felt amazing, and she hated herself for it.

She needed to get out.

"Kaoru."

His voice was low, gravelly, a mix between a whisper and a groan. Kaoru loved the way he said her name. It didn't help that his lips were pressed to the shell of her ear. She tried to reposition herself again, but his body wouldn't budge. Kenshin's voice always could make her toes curl. The hand on her breast moved again, and this time Kaoru knew that it was intentional. Her eyes fluttered open as he became much more aggressive, his jean clad legs moving against hers provocatively. He was truly using whatever he could to his advantage, and Kaoru could feel herself slowly succumbing. She wasn't even sure if she wanted to fight.

His touch was wonderful, and she had gone four years without it. She started moving her legs against his, enjoying the friction created by her smooth legs against the coarse material of his pants. Tilting her head back, she didn't object to Kenshin's lips and teeth working their way down her neck. He kissed gently at the chain that held the diamond he had given her on it and she shuddered at the tenderness. Not bothering to censor herself, she let her free hand come up to cup the back of his head. She wanted to see his face. He lit a fire deep inside of her.

"That's it Kaoru. My Kaoru."

His words were spoken possessively against her neck, and she could feel his lips draw back into a smile against her. It felt sinful. It felt heavenly.

Kenshin's free hand moved down from her breasts and ghosted along the top of her panties. She knew immediately that this was getting out of control, but the only sort of response she could produce was one of pleasure, her hand fisting and entangling itself deeper into his hair. Kenshin's hair felt like strands of silk between her fingers. Just like she remembered. A wordless half moan followed shortly after.

"Shhhh Kaoru," his hand dipped underneath the cotton fabric and she jumped in shock and delight as Kenshin's fingers moved against her, the strokes firm and teasing. His voice was pure seduction, "I'll take care of you. Let me take care of you."

Kaoru wasn't clear if the desperation she heard in his voice was real or not. But she believed him. He really truly unconditionally loved her, and she didn't deserve him. She pushed herself forward, not sure if she was attempting to pull away from his body or closer to his hand and the wicked pleasure it gave to her. He chuckled low against her ear, and she knew exactly which one he thought she was doing.

Kaoru could feel the pleasure twist and grow inside of her, her breath turning into sharp gasps as her hips continued to move of their own volition. Kenshin's voice was unrelenting and speaking in low tones against her ear, his hot breath and intimate words increasing the heat within her. His hand changed its pattern and Kaoru reeled, unable to find footing. Kaoru's pants sounded loud in her ears, the moans growing into soft cries as her legs attempted to find footing in the tangled sheets. Her fingers clenched and unclenched in abrupt spasms, her body becoming tighter and tighter.

"Come on Kaoru, you're almost there."

Kenshin's voice ghosted over her, the words triggering something deep within her.

Her desire crested in an abrupt wave that left her mouth open in a sharp keening noise. Before it could emerge Kenshin turned her head to his and covered it with his mouth. He swallowed her scream, and for the first time in four years, Kaoru kissed Kenshin. His lips tasted just as she remembered, and his kiss was just as familiar. Her eyes shut in concentration, and her body shuddered repeatedly before slowly coming down. The twisting movement of her hips slowed their frantic actions. She lay quiet, still trembling, his mouth moving over hers softly. His hand drew circles on her abdomen, his fingers damp against her stomach. Kaoru's sweat cooled against her skin, and pieces of her hair stuck against her face. Eventually her body stopped shivering and she lay unmoving in his arms, her mouth accepting Kenshin's lips and intruding tongue.

Kenshin made her feel beautiful, sexy, and wanted. He had given her pleasure, unconcerned with his own, and she knew that he didn't mind. His focus was on her, it was always on her, even when they were dating. He loved to make her smile, hear her laugh. And he would give and give and think nothing of himself. She adored that about him, loved his giving nature.

He slowly rolled her over to her other side so that she faced him. Kaoru couldn't bring herself to open her eyes. She felt weak and shaky. His mouth left hers, and she leaned forward in an effort to keep the contact. His hand continued its slow exploration of her stomach and side. She heard him sigh and felt his hand move along her hip in a soothing fashion.

"Kaoru," his voice was soft and coaxing, "Open your eyes Kaoru, let me see your eyes."

Listening to his voice, she couldn't help but force them open. He lay close to her, his nose nearly touching hers. The light from the window lit up his red hair, creating a look of fire and enhancing his nearly amber eyes. He seemed to focus on her alone, seemed to be taking in her every expression and move. In that second she realized exactly what had happened. She could feel the sudden flush on her cheeks and the self-consciousness that quickly followed. Did he think less of her? Was she nothing but an easy slut? Did he worry that she slept around? Where did this put them? Did he expect her to fold? What had she just done?

"Please Kaoru," she strained her ears to hear his voice, "Don't be embarrassed. That was beautiful, you are so beautiful."

She struggled at the sudden urge she had to cry. Her eyes felt watery and she blinked repeatedly in an effort to quell them. He leaned forward and she held her breath as Kenshin kissed away the few tears that had escaped. Always he seemed to know exactly what she was feeling.

"I love you."

Kaoru nodded her head, accepting the words he spoke. Reaching forward with her hand, she allowed herself the luxury of touching his face. He seemed to freeze beneath her hand, his eyes searching hers for something. What it was he wanted to see, she didn't know.

"I know you do Kenshin."

They were the first words she had spoken to him that day, and they were the truth. And she knew that this morning, no matter how wonderful, only weakened her resolve. Shaking her head slightly, she rolled away from him, putting her feet over the side of the bed and sitting up.

Kaoru still felt slightly flustered, and she brought her hand up to try and adjust her messy hair. There were several red strands threaded through her fingers. She didn't remember clenching her hands that much. Hastily she pulled them off. What was she supposed to do now? What had she just done? He moved up behind her, placing his hands carefully on her shoulders.

"Don't shut me out. Don't push me away."

He spoke quietly into her ear, his face incredibly close to her own. Although he was still as powerful and intense as he always was, there seemed to be an added sense of knowing in his words. What did he know now that he hadn't known before? She had no idea.

"I just…" she tried to gather her thoughts, "I just need to think a bit."

Kenshin rubbed at her shoulders, his strong hands easing out knots that hadn't relaxed during his earlier ministrations. He kissed her cheek then removed himself.

"Okay." his voice was calmer than she'd thought it would be, "Why don't you take a shower and I'll check on Kenji."

What? Just like that? Wasn't he going to pester her for more information and then use what had just happened against her? If he hadn't done what he did to gain an advantage, than what exactly was he thinking? Shouldn't they be arguing? Shouldn't she be trying to throw him out? Why hadn't he continued in his previous motions. She had been more than willing to help him remove his jeans. If he removed his shirt now and pulled her back, she still wouldn't say no. She loved that he wasn't overly concerned with his own release, but…she wanted to give him the same pleasure he gave her.

Ignoring her inner monologue, she stood up and made her way across the room, trying to disregard the feeling of his eyes watching her. Her legs felt unstable beneath her. His actions had…unnerved her. She wished she had slipped on her robe, but it was hung up in the bathroom. Kaoru pulled at the bottom of her shirt, wishing it were a bit longer.

Opening her bedroom door she shrieked and closed it again. There were two men standing in her living room with Kenji between them- and she was half naked. How long had they been there? She felt a violent blush on her cheeks. Had they…heard her and Kenshin?

Kenshin was instantly next to her, pushing her back and stepping protectively in front of her. He hadn't seen what was outside of the door, but she had cried out. Instinctively he protected her, and Kaoru felt her heart both soar and sink at this. Turning to her, his eyes traveled the length of her frame quickly, making sure there wasn't any damage. She resisted the urge to shake him. Kenshin's eyes moved up to her own, and he gently pushed at her shoulders so she was far from the door. She tried to get his attention, but he was already approaching it, a tenseness and fierceness suddenly in his stance.

Crap. This was not good.

* * *

AN- I know what all of you are probably thinking. This chapter was wayyyy to short. Well, you are right. But, because I'm on a school break right now, I am going to work my bum off to get you another chapter in the next week and a half. I'm hoping that will quell any anger. Oh, and by the way I know Yahiko didn't make an appearance this chapter…unfortunately I didn't get to him, that will happen next time. So, feel free to review, they make me sooo happy. Oh, and where did ALL that sexiness come from? I have no idea.

Next Time- Yahiko works with his hair (finally), Kenshin finds himself in an awkward situation, and we get to see Misao during one of her stressful moments.

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	11. Analyzing the Situation

Author's Note- As everyone may or may not know; Things Left Unsaid has been nominated for an RK AWARD at Meiji Tales! If you enjoy this story, and you also enjoy voting and participating in these sorts of things, please, go there. Because every year they always have a great collection of tales, and if nothing else, you may find a great read that you haven't seen before.

* * *

Things Left Unsaid

Chapter 11

Analyzing the Situation

* * *

Misao sat hunched over her desk, her long unkempt hair hanging in tangles over her face and back. She had taken a shower earlier and hadn't bothered to even comb through it. Still damp, it hung heavy and limp, the water adding extra weight and strain. Although she had used conditioner, she could feel the snarls and kinks setting in stubbornly. Usually even the thought of having tangles made her squirm, but tonight it just didn't seem important. Dressed in a long t-shirt covered with Pluto the Disney dog and matching shorts, she stared blankly through the curtain of her hair at the magazine she had borrowed from her roommate. The newest Cosmopolitan, she had been paging through it for the last half hour without taking in a word. It was rather unfortunate, considering that she really needed the relationship advice.

Her roommate was fast asleep, and the dim light of the television lit up the otherwise dark room in a soft barely-there light. The volume was on its lowed setting, and the sound filled the room with a comfortable background murmur. A late night infomercial praised the advantages of a seven layered strainer. It was her third time watching it tonight. Bleary eyed, she focused her gaze on the alarm clock propped up next to her unmade bed. It was past four. Misao rubbed the back of her hand across her face, wishing that she could snuggle under her covers and fall asleep.

She'd tried that already. From twelve to two she had tossed and turned, pulling on both her comforter and sheets. After that long, she'd tried a shower, hoping the hot water would be soothing. The water had been as hot as she could handle, and when she'd climbed out of it her skin had been pink and raw. Unfortunately, the warm water hadn't calmed her rampant thoughts. It was much later now, and Misao's mind was still so twisted she could barely think straight. She felt like she was being put through the wash, like her heart had been stomped on by a herd of cows.

Shutting the magazine with a sigh, she hunched forward until her head was resting against the cool surface of the desk. Her eyes closed in reflex, and beneath her lids swarmed a plethora of color. Misao stretched her legs out beneath her; the muscles were cramped and stiff with tension. Her entire body felt tight with worry, and even though she'd taken three ibuprofens, her head was still throbbing. The coolness of the desk beneath her helped with the pounding. She wished again for drowsiness.

It wasn't her fault though. At least, she was pretty sure it wasn't her fault. Her legs kicked reflexively as she sat up again. Who was she kidding? This was a huge knotted insane mess she was wrapped up in, and it was her fault as much as it was his. Perhaps even more. Blinking her grain filled eyes; she banished the sudden image of a tall lanky man with cool eyes and a hot touch.

Pushing her chair back, Misao stood on shaky legs. She didn't want to think about it, she'd been thinking about it all afternoon. _Him._ With his cold then hot personality, good looks, and the incredibly confusing scene he had been a part of earlier that day. She still wasn't sure what to think, what to feel. Biting at her fingernails, Misao tottered toward her dresser. She needed to find her comb. Needed to focus on something else that wasn't Aoshi or his perplexing words.

The battered piece of furniture was covered in lotions, old movie stubs, comic books, hair bands, text books, and somewhere…a comb. Peering under her worn copy of her English MLA Formatting book, she spied the pink end of it. Pulling it out while barely disturbing the surrounding objects, she sat on the edge of her bed and attempted to pull the comb through her hair. It was so snarled that when she jerked it, she felt herself tear up. Sucking in a deep breath, she mercilessly dragged it through her locks. Her head burned with pain, and she could feel the strands twisting and breaking under the pressure. However, it was a distraction from the confusion filling her mind.

She was stupid to think that things could keep on going the way they were. Her mind conjured up the picture he had made earlier today. When Aoshi had gotten back this morning, he had been ferocious, merciless, _amazing_. A shiver spread from her toes to the tip of her head. Her cheeks warmed, and she touched her neck unconsciously. She'd need more than a couple of turtlenecks to hide all of the marks he had left. Misao had never been the focus of so much…want. He'd taken and taken and taken, until she thought she had nothing left to give. And still he had taken more from her. And she had wanted him to take all of her. She had wanted to disappear inside of him. To become a part of him, because she had known that all too soon he would have to leave her again.

She still wasn't sure what had happened to make him suddenly so desperate and needy. Something had altered him, and it had happened between when he'd left and then returned to the hotel room. Unfortunately, she had no idea. He was always in control of his emotions, aware of his surroundings. Aoshi this morning had been anything but. And she had loved it, loved seeing all of him and showing all of herself. He had been stripped bare; she'd seen it in his eyes. The desperate desire that had looked like love. And he had stripped her equally bare beneath him, peered into the core of her as she had him. Now she wondered what he had seen inside of her. What had she unintentionally given away?

She winced at a particularly tough knot. And then he'd apologized. Apologized for finally showing her the real him beneath his icy exterior. Misao had seen glimpses, knew different parts of him…but this had been so much more. That he could think she would feel anything but deliciously tired after such an ordeal was beyond her. It had been unnerving to see him so uncertain over his actions. It had also been strangely, cute.

But then, then he had said… Setting her comb to the side, she lay back and tucked herself into bed. She stared blankly at the bottom of the top bunk. Then he had gone and ruined everything by asking her to move! Her arm rose to cover her eyes, as if by blocking her sight she could shut out the images. She had known, _known_ that a long distance relationship couldn't continue. But, still… Misao rolled to her side and pulled out her stuffed bear- the one Aoshi had given her.

Putting it under her chin, she breathed in the smell of Aoshi. She had obviously been embarrassed receiving it from him…and she would never admit to sleeping with it as some sort of substitute for him. And she had no idea how he'd even known that something so silly would make her so happy.

Now the poor bear was worn from hugs and snuggles, its dark brown fur faded, and the red velvet ribbon around its neck frayed. He had stopped by once to pick her up, and had seen it sitting on her bed. Tattered, he had picked it up while she rummaged around for a clean pair of socks. She had been so uncomfortable she'd ignored him and the bear that betrayed her intense affections.

And now…now she might never have that sort of couple moment that they'd shared again. One way or another, things were changing. And she didn't want them too. She didn't do well with change, she never had. He wanted her to move. She had thought originally that he was breaking up with her. She snuggled closer to her stuffed bear and sighed. It had hurt, more than she thought possible. When she'd thought he was dumping her, every one of her fears had spread uncontrollably. He didn't want her, didn't care for her, he had just needed a warm willing body. She would never fit into his daily life, he could never see her in any more than a 'fuck buddy' situation. Misao remembered feeling as if the floor had dropped out from under her, and she'd wanted so badly to just leave. It had been humiliating.

But then he'd said he needed her.

He'd looked bemused first, then fierce in his proclamation. It was hard to know what to do.

She rolled to her other side and reached for the remote. The first infomercial had ended and now one on a magical blender played. Ignoring the chattering host, she flipped it off and left the room in stillness.

Aoshi had seemed more than sincere. He did want her with him in New York. The question was, why? To continue dating? Exclusively? That she supposed was the first question. She wasn't even sure if they were exclusive right now. Misao knew she was. She had no desire to see anyone else besides him. Did he feel the same way? And if they weren't really exclusive and she moved…what then? Did they become exclusive, or did this… this, whatever this was, continue?

She pulled her pillow over her head and let out a frustrated sigh. Why did she have to overanalyze everything? It wasn't fair! She needed Aoshi, but she just couldn't believe that he really needed her. How could he possibly need _her_? She wasn't like him, so unique, so special, so extra-ordinary. She was just…Misao. Tomboyish, skinny, annoying Misao.

And if she did move to be closer to him, would he finally see that? That was it. That was the biggest question. The gut wrenching fear. Would he finally see her for what she was? Just like everyone else she had dated or wanted to date. Why would he date her when there were so many others that were…anything but her? She knew that she trusted him, that wasn't the question. But this was more than trust to her. Could Misao trust him to take care of her as long as they went out? Could she really believe that he could see her everyday and still want her with the intensity he did now?

She wanted to say yes.

And if his intentions were everything she hoped they were, then what? Was she willing to move for him, pick and go? Oh God, if this was for real…she couldn't let him leave. Misao knew what her friends would say. That she was still so young, that a person should never give up everything for a boy; that she should shop around for other boys. She buried her head into the teddy she was holding. Aoshi wasn't just any boy though. Moving would be hard, but it would hardly be a sacrifice. After all, she'd always wanted to travel. Her family was small, but their closeness wouldn't be put in jeopardy by her leaving. She had come to crave him. His dry wit, smoky eyes, and quiet personality were an intricate part of her daydreams. She didn't want to shop around, didn't want anyone else. Why couldn't anyone around her see that? Misao wanted Aoshi. Just Aoshi, day in and day out.

Her hand slowly came down from her eyes. This was why the talk had been long overdue. She didn't know what they were; what he wanted from her. He'd said he needed her. She needed to know for how long, and in what capacity.

So…Misao took a deep breath and half sat up. She would finally really think of everything, really put herself out there and admit that there was a problem. This was a relationship, and not thinking of the problems wouldn't make them go away. A shaky breath escaped her lips.

"Things are not okay."

She smiled self depreciatingly. Saying it out loud was a big step. Hopefully she could keep up this self honesty up until tomorrow.

* * *

Yahiko glanced out of the taxi window, his eyes swollen and raw from the lack of good sleep. They burned with dryness, and he craved a bottle of Visine and five to ten blissful undisturbed hours of sleep. Although he had changed at the bus station, the clothes he had put on still felt dirty and un-kept. The worn jeans hung low on his hips, and the equally tattered shirt was soft from multiple washings and wearings. They were both perfect for traveling, but lacked the fresh clean feeling he wanted. He would have killed for a hot long shower. Hell, maybe he would be able to fulfill both of his desires once he got to Kaoru's. Rolling his shoulders, he glanced out of the window at the approaching apartment complex.

The early morning light had just begun to wash over the city, making the practically empty streets glitter despite the filth that covered them. It was still too early for rush hour, and he silently thanked his luck. It had taken hours to get there, and even though he was absolutely physically miserable, he was still glad. Kaoru. A younger version of his sister flashed in his mind and he smiled softly. He had been trying to think of some excuse to visit her for months. But she was so god awful stubborn, that if he'd even suggested it she would have thrown a hissy fit. She'd done it before.

He wanted to be a part of her life, part of his nephew's life. His head rolled back in his seat. That still shocked him. Yahiko was an uncle. A freakn' uncle. His sister, the girl he'd teased and poked and prodded, was a mother. And a damn good one at that. The things she did for her son, the hell she put herself through for him. Not that she would ever say so. The last time he had visited he'd seen the way she was slowly coming apart. She just couldn't cope. Supporting Kenji, relying on no one, and hiding from a past even he didn't know. She was floundering. He wanted to take some of the burden off of her. More than that, he wanted to be what she needed. And when he watched her he knew that it wasn't him she required.

Fuck Kenshin. He hated the guy. The red haired man had come by the house just after she'd disappeared, when Yahiko was still so sure that she would show up at any moment. He'd always been so good to his sister, always been so kind to him. It didn't matter to him now if Kenshin rescued a bus full of children. The only way he could possibly redeem himself was to fix this mess and fix his sister. And until then, Yahiko didn't want to even think about him.

He'd do what he could instead. The young man knew it was impossible for him to make things the way they were, but he sure as hell could come see her when she called.

Yahiko glanced at the equally creased man next to him. A strong shadow covered his jaw, and with his equally messy hair he looked like a cross between a biker and a homeless person. His eyes were partly closed and he kept jerking as if he were fighting sleep. They opened completely after a few seconds and took in Kaoru's neighborhood. His hand covered his mouth as he yawned before moving to ruffle his already chaotic hair.

"We're almost there, finally."

Sano's voice sounded like he looked. Like shit. Yahiko nodded his head in agreement.

He didn't know if Sanosuke coming was a good idea. Sano was a big personality, and he didn't know if he was what Kaoru needed. Maybe she would have preferred just him. No, that wasn't true. Yahiko wanted to be there for his sister. Himself. Even he would admit it. He didn't ever get to see her or Kenji. He'd depended on her for so much of his youth; he just wanted to be there for her. It was selfish and small minded of him, and he hated himself for it. He didn't want to share her, not when he saw her every six months or more. It was stupid, and he knew it.

He pinched at the bridge of his nose and added a third item to his wish list. On top of Visine and five to ten hours of sleep; he wanted four aspirin. He did not need to have his own self-centered childhood hang-ups making an appearance today. Kaoru was in some sort of trouble. Yahiko would do what he could to help her, and maybe he'd convince her to let him come up again soon and see her. He couldn't do anymore. And it pissed him off to no end that he was able to do so little.

The taxi stopped and Yahiko pulled himself out of the vehicle. Standing made him perfectly aware of how long he'd been sitting on that blasted bus. He turned and twisted, shaking his legs out as he did so. The pins and needles feeling slowly faded, but didn't completely disappear.

Pulling his bag out from the trunk while Sano paid the driver, Yahiko let his full attention fall on the building across the street. The sun seemed to highlight each crumbling brick and piece of litter. Every time he saw the place Kaoru was living, he resisted the urge to yell at her. She and Kenji shouldn't even have to look at such a rundown building. Instead, he knew that she had to save and live thrifty just to pay the rent for her excuse of an apartment. It was ridiculous and idiotic. Yahiko took a deep breath through his clenched teeth.

Setting off across the street, he ignored the grumbling man following a few steps behind him. He crinkled his nose at the heavy stench of pollution and garbage that permeated the air. Entering the old building, he tried not to smile as he let go of the door at the most opportune moment.

"Hey!" Sano groused; catching the frame before it could smack him in the face, "Watch it you pip squeak!"

Yahiko ignored Sano, inwardly laughing at the older man. He loved picking at Sanosuke, the two of them were at their best when they were annoying each other. It was also a great stress reliever. Even he would admit that he was wound too tightly. The tension running through his frame had only grown since he had spoken with her. There was just something about his and Kaoru's conversation that he couldn't let go. It had set him on edge. Her voice had wavered, nearly crying, and it had torn into him. Yahiko could not stand his sister so apprehensive.

He worried that his premonition had finally come to pass. Kaoru, strong as she was- had finally broken down.

"Whatever Sano, it was an accident."

He spoke in his most insolent voice.

"Yeah right."

Adjusting the bag on his shoulders, he examined the hallway with a critical eye as he traveled farther into the building. Approaching the door, he glanced down at his wrist watch. At nine o'clock in the morning he wasn't sure yet if his sister would be up. It all depended on her rambunctious son.

Sanosuke stepped up next to him and raised an inquiring eyebrow. Yahiko gave him a blank look. Shrugging his shoulders, the taller man rapped loudly on the door before leaning against the door frame. He stifled a yawn.

Waiting a few seconds, Yahiko covered his own exhausted yawn with the back of his hand. Growing impatient he nearly knocked too before he heard movement on the other side of the wood.

"Who is it?"

The childish voice was barely audible to him. Kenji. Yahiko felt a real grin on his mouth grow.

"Hey bud, it's your uncle Yahiko. Is your mom around?"

An excited gasp came out from behind the door and he heard the deadlock being undone. Yahiko knew he should be upset that Kenji was letting them in without looking through the peephole to check. Then again, the boy couldn't reach the viewer even if he wanted to. Unless his nephew had grown exponentially since the last time he'd seen him. He grinned at the thought. And where was Kaoru? She wasn't one to let her son answer the door independently.

The worn wood swung open, and a small red head peeked out. Large eyes peered up through thick bangs, and a wide smile split Kenji's face. Stepping forward he wrapped his arms around Yahiko and made a squeaking noise.

"Yahiko Yahiko Yahiko Yahiko!"

The small boy jumped up and down in glee, his voice repeating his uncle's name over and over again. Laughing, Yahiko brought his hand down and ruffled the younger boy's hair. It was still messy from sleep. The boy had grown, the last time his uncle had seen him he'd been unable to correctly pronounce 'Yahiko.' It had come out sounding closer to 'Ya-ko.' Kenji giggled, his laughter ringing in the otherwise quiet hallway.

"Hey squirt!"

Sano's voice cut through, in its most 'tough guy' teasing mode. Kenji laughed even harder, his attention moving to Yahiko's companion.

"Sanono!"

Sanosuke blushed and scratched at the back of his head as Kenji moved to hug him too. The tough brute looked both embarrassed at the nickname, and pleased at Kenji's memory.

"It's Sano, Kenji."

Yahiko snickered. He wasn't sure when Kenji had started calling Sanosuke, Sanono- but he sure as hell thought it was hilarious. Sano glared at him while Kenji started repeating 'Sanono' over and over again.

"Hey Kenji," Yahiko kneeled down, "Can we come in and see your Mom?"

Kenji nodded his head enthusiastically before turning and heading into the apartment. The footie pajamas caused the boy to swerve and stumble in his hastiness. Yahiko followed, Sano shutting the door behind them. Kenji bounced through the room, obviously thrilled at the unexpected visit. Yahiko eyed the apartment critically, taking in the disintegrating wallpaper and old furniture. He tried to push it out of his mind.

Bringing a hand up to his head, he tried to flatten his dirty hair. It was hopeless. He turned his attention to Kenji when he didn't see Kaoru in the kitchen or living room.

"Hey bud, where's your mom?"

Yahiko was certain that Kaoru would never leave her son unsupervised in the apartment. But was she changing? Sleeping? In the bathroom? Cleaning? Kenji eyed him as he pulled playfully at Sano's hand, chortling with amusement every time the older man pulled him up to his tip toes. His pajamas were so cute they made his teeth hurt.

"Mom's sleeping." The boy was suddenly whispering, "So we have to be very very quiet."

Kenji was in the best no-nonsense voice his youth would allow. Yahiko nodded in solemn agreement, and watched Sano do the same thing. If Kaoru was sleeping, there was no way that he wanted to wake her. She worked way too hard, and if he could help watch Kenji so she could catch up on some much needed rest- he would gladly.

Twenty minutes later and they were sprawled out over the living room floor. Colorful blocks of all shapes and sizes littered the area, a half formed block mass covering much of the available floor. Sano lay on his stomach, more asleep then awake, a ridiculous line of drool starting to pool on the arm beneath his head. At least he wasn't snoring. Yahiko eyed the man with envy and wished longingly that he was able to fall asleep at the drop of a hat. Sanosuke had been snoozing within the first five minutes of settling himself onto the floor. Yahiko was not so lucky.

He sat next to Kenji, running a hand over his eyes every few minutes in an effort to wake himself. The luke warm cup of coffee next to him hadn't helped him in the least. Kaoru's coffee maker produced some of the weakest, most awful tasting coffee he'd ever drunk. Kenji sat next to Sano, so enthralled by the blocks and his guests that Yahiko was having a hard time following the boy's one sided conversation. The boy chatted in a quiet voice that grew louder and louder as time passed. He didn't even seem to remember that his mom was napping only a room over.

After putting each block in place, Kenji would turn to Yahiko and ask him what he thought before moving onto the next one. So far Yahiko had done his best to respond in an excited voice. However, he wasn't quite sure how to react when he had no idea what the boy was making. So he nodded in what he thought was an appropriate way, and tried to add what he could.

Kenji added a bright blue block to the top of a curved wall….thingie…

"Kenji? What _are_ we making again?"

He hoped his nephew wouldn't be offended.

The red haired boy looked at the blocks quizzically. Chewing on his lower lip he turned his head up toward Yahiko. Kenji's face was completely serious.

"An impenin…inpentrible fortress."

Yahiko fought a wide smile. _Impenentrible _indeed. It was so sweet he was sure to get cavities.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah!" Kenji's voice was trembling with animation, "We have to be ready for when the ninjas come!"

Yahiko knew, without needing a mirror, that a puzzled expression covered his face.

"Ninjas?"

He couldn't remember Kenji mentioning them earlier.

"Yeah, they are hiding under that mountain."

Back to a whisper soft voice, Kenji pointed a knowing finger at Sanosuke. The man's arms were shiny with drool.

"Ahhh, that mountain."

Yahiko's smile grew wildly. He wished he had a camera.

They continued working, the mess of a blocks slowly coming together into a building of sorts. When Kenji declared the project 'done,' Yahiko's back had a crick in it from bending and reaching.

Stretching his arms over his head, his stomach growled in protest. He hadn't even noticed until now how hungry he was. He eyed Kaoru's bedroom. Would it be rude of him to cook and eat breakfast without her? Five minutes ago he could have sworn he heard someone stirring in there, but he didn't want to bother her before she was ready. Besides, he could still fondly remember his sister's cooking…half done eggs, stringy chicken, luke warm soup…he repressed a shiver. Poor Kenji.

"Hey bud? You hungry for breakfast?"

Kenji jumped so high, he nearly tipped over what he'd just built. Yahiko brought a hand forward to steady him. The boy had a serious case of the wiggles. Completely ignoring what he'd just assembled, his nephew jumped over the sleeping Sano and tore through into the kitchen. Yahiko stood up slowly, and half kicked Sano as he stepped over him. The man didn't even bat an eyelash.

In the kitchen, Yahiko opened and closed cupboards, looking for something quick and easy. Seeing only frozen dinners and dry cereal, he turned to Kenji.

"What would you like Kenji? What do you and your mom usually have for breakfast?"

Looking through Kaoru's kitchen, he truly was curious. There was nothing here that he found the least bit appropriate for an early morning meal. He supposed that later today he'd go grocery shopping with her. Frozen meals were not his favorite. And Sano could probably eat five in one sitting.

"Me and Mom and Kenshin had pancakes!"

Yahiko nodded his head while opening the freezer and half listening. Seeing nothing, he shut it and turned back to Kenji. The boy was digging through a lower shelf full of dry goods. Well, if they usually had pancakes….wait…The words Kenji had said made his mind standstill.

"Kenji? When was Kenshin here?"

His body went cold with apprehension. His breathing seemed suddenly loud and fast in his ears. The conversation that Yahiko had had with Kaoru came rushing back. How her voice had wavered, how she had needed to see him. If Kenshin was here, if Kenshin had approached Kaoru…Shit. Shit. Shit. His fists clenched painfully. She had stayed away from New York and her family for a reason. He had found her?

Goddammit. Yahiko's gaze strayed down to his oblivious nephew. If Kenshin was here, then he was aware of Kenji. His sister must have nearly had a heart attack.

Kenji seemed thrilled to discuss his new friend.

"He was here… and he was sooo cool! And the pancakes he made were so yummy, and," Kenji's voice dropped again, "Mommy and him are having a sleep over so we have to be quiet."

Yahiko felt his jaw go slack. A sleepover? Kenshin was here? Now? With Kaoru? Had he been here since last night? That motherfucker. Yahiko was not going to let Kenshin step all over his sister. Not this time. Kenshin had wrecked Kaoru's life already once before. If he wasn't fixing the mess he'd started, he could get the hell out of his sister's room. Not thinking, Yahiko turned abruptly back into the living room.

Walking up beside the dozing Sano, he kicked the man. The hard move knocked the tall man onto his back. Sano jerked awake, mumbling and wiping at his mouth. Although hilarious, Yahiko was no longer in the mood to laugh. He was pissed.

Sano blinked several times before fully waking. Grumbling he turned his scowl filled face up.

"Yahiko, what the hell?"

The younger man leaned down and helped haul his friend to his feet. They both nearly tripped over Kenji, who had managed to wedge himself between the two of them.

Yahiko leaned in and tried to ignore Sano's atrocious breath.

"You are never going to be-"

Kaoru's bedroom door opened, and Yahiko's words halted. Both he and Sano found their eyes gluedto her. She stood within the doorframe, her hair tousled and tangled. His sister looked exhausted, tired, and at the end of her rope. Dressed in only a shirt, a rosy flush stained her cheeks and a look of both surprise and horror crossed her face.

She shrieked before shutting the door with a loud thump.

Trying to recover from the unexpected noise, he watched Sano rub his ears.

"What the hell is her deal?"

Yahiko had no time to warn his friend that Kenshin was there and the core of Kaoru's problem. He heard the door click open again, and in a blur of red saw Sanosuke eat carpet.

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AN: Wow, that chapter got so unbelievably long., but I just couldn't leave it off anywhere else. I know you were all sad about the lack of KK…but I'll do what I can next chapter. By the way, please feel free to leave a review. (wink wink)

Next Time: Kenshin apologizes to Sano about the carpet eating; Yahiko gives Kenshin the 'Don't mess with my sister' talk… and Kenshin feels a little deflated and irked.

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